It's one hundred percent true that Roxy didn't bat an eye when the tabloids came out...because she batted them both. As the history books will show, it was mere minutes after the article was posted upon BUDnews.com, that Roxy came out with a response. Not only that, but it was small minutes after that, in which she dialed up Perez Hilton. If you don't know him, he's the tabloid queen - famous for marking trashy rish bitches like Amy Winehouse (crackhead), Paris Hilton (whore), and Foxy Roxy (crackhead, whore, and untalented wrestling company owner). Although it would be just like Roxy to deny it, to lie, it seems to be all she's good at lately.

Zarek was running his stuff on BUDnews.com, but what Roxy failed to notice, as ignorant as she is, is that she caused her own downfall. As soon as Perez posted on his website, the general public instantly became interested. Mikey's been contacted numerous time by the mass media, and has given several public interviews. It shows, that Perez Hilton is easily down in the polls. People just don't like him as much anymore, why? Because he hates on the talented. Simple, but true. He only likes the crazy bitchy. Take Brittany Spaars for instance. She was Perez's favorite in the year she shaved her head and went psycho. Now that she's actually getting better, making a comeback, Perez will probably dump her ass. He can't handle talent, they outshine him, which is why he feels so comfortable around Roxy. What she's failed to see, is that Zarek has never been humiliated by these tabloids, mainly because they're tired, they're the same thing over and over again. All it's done is increase Zarek's fans, if that was even possible, and expose Roxy for the lowlife she is. But of course, only to the people who didn't already know.

Once Perez and Roxy's scene cuts out, a new scene cuts in. The sound of someone typing upon a keyboard is all that's heard as the camera focuses soley upon the keyboard. The fingers of the individual are seen, and they are obviously male. The camera then raises to the computer screen and sees that someone is typing in perezhilton.com and pressing enter. The pages instantly flickers to life, overwhelming with pink. Perez's annoying face pops up on the screen on a banner as well, but the person quickly scrolls down to the updated stories. As the camera pans out, it's revealed that Mikey Svarro is the person on the computer. As if you didn't know.

"So let's see, the Jonai Help Ring In 2009."

Wow, great story. I especially like the fact that anyone watching that specific channel, which is probably a lot given how big these guys have gotten, already knew this.

"Kiki Drunks, looking lovely - as usual"

A story about how bad Kristen Dunst dresses badly. Defintely A quality there. [sarcasm]

"Oprah Gives $365,000 to Atlanta Inner City School"

That's cool, Oprah's always been up for charity. Though it's hardly anything tabloid worthy. Oprah's has enough money to hand out thousands of dollars, thanks for telling us again.

"Wow, great writing there. Stuff that we not only already knew, but stuff that we don't rightly care about. These are the most updated stories you have up?"

He laughes a most demeaning laugh, directed, of course, at Perez's so called 'great' website, that provides you with close to nothing, and let's you read upon mediocre news written by a mediocre reporter and his butt buddies.

"It's pretty fitting that Perez finally speak about the match, AFTER I already did. I came up with my own stuff, and all he did was prove what a bottomfeeder he is, by feeding off of mine. Nice job Perez, I'm glad you didn't stray from what people already thought about you."

Sidenote by Non-pathetic Reporter: Christina Gellar wasn't onto something, given the fact that she tried to hook up with Zarek after such reports were posted. Perez Hilton was just, AGAIN, picking up somebody else's tired scraps. Feeding off somebody's elses words. Doing something that's already been done.

"When are you going to realize that not everybody is gay, Perez? Really though, how many people have you reported as gay? Vin Diesel, Mathew McConaughey, Lance Armstrong, and now Zarek Lyle? The man who's been with two of the most gorgeaous beauties in the wrestling entertainment today? This gay thing, let it go. It's tired out now, and you're pathetic for thinking you have something. Let me ask you something, why is it that you can never come up with something of your own? Exactly. It's always been a mystery to me how people have already come out with a story, and then suddenly the same exact thing is posted on your website. You steal other's stories Perez, and this is no different. What makes this even more sad, is that this isn't even a true tabloid. It was disproven about a year ago. Get your facts straight. Then again, I wouldn't expect anything straight to come from you, Perez."

He types youtube up into the address bar, searching up Perez's and Roxy's recent 'promo' (if you can call it that). He fasts forwards to the part where Perez out right admits that he doesn't write his own stories, he doesn't do his own research, but has somebody do it for him, instead.

"By the way, you just proved me right, idiot. You don't have to do research, is exactly what you said. You have people to 'get your stories FOR YOU' are your exact words. I don't doubt that these people, who GIVE you stories, as you said. I believe that these stolen stories come from a top source, some of the biggest tabloid magazines in the world, as you say. Like that one, that reported on UFOs taking over the world come New Years of 2009. I especially liked that one. Although, I'm still here, so I guess it wasn't true, just like the stories you're given."

Now, he heads to google, and types his name into the address bar. While it's true some stuff about Sbarro comes up, which is a given considering his last name is so close in spelling, other things also begint to pop up. The ones that stand out the most are the pieces he's written on BUD superstars. He even recieved a high merrit on some of them, mainly because he ended up being right on way more than one occasion.

"Who am I? Oh, you're funny. If you knew anything about the wrestling world, you'd know who I was. Especially in '07, which you claim was a big year for you. Who am I? I'm the first one who reported one Novacaine being Dark Child's choice for the Heavyweight title match. I was the first who reported on Valek's FALSE return, which was hyped galore. I was the first one on the scene for Dannica's controversial move to drop the Bytch title to Mandy Manson. Who am I? You've got to be joking. If anything, I'm the king reporter of this world, and you're nothing. The only thing second rate here, are your so called 'fact checkers'. If you don't know who I am yet, then you might want to check your facts yourself next time, kay?"

He then searches the law suits that were brought against Perez in 2007, most of them are stalking charges. Apparently Perez was always willing to go to far in order to get his stories. Even with these charges against him, he still couldn't come up with a decent tabloid against people like Zarek. It's sad, really. He probably did all the digging he could, and found nothing. So he posted some bullshit story. It's doubtful this is the first time.

"Why the drama if these stories aren't true? Maybe because you, lying sack of shit, are tarning their name. Nobody likes some fat flamer trying to bring them down, after all they've worked for. Yet here you are, trying to become famous for talking shit. That's something different. By the looks of you, you've never actually worked a day in your life, so it'd be you who would try to get famous off of this. I mean, look at you, trying to be seen everywhere. The reason why you make up lies, tell these tall tales, is simply because you're jealous of the people you write about. You want to have their celebrity status, so you try to bring them down to your level. Just because you cause drama doesn't make you great, you should ask Roxy about that one."

The camera spans out even further and a computer desk is revealed. He reaches into a nearby droor and pulls out his BUD contract, signed by Stephanie McMahon. Shouldn't Roxy know who she has on staff? Mikey thinks so. It's apparent that all BUD superstars would think so, as well. Putting BUD above herself, my ass.

"So, Roxy's never heard of me, eh? Then it just proves what people have been saying about her for years now. She's not out for the good of BUD, she's out for the good of herself. She doesn't even know the people that she has on her roster. How is she supposed to be upkeeping BUD's glory while not even realizing who she has under contract? Not to mention, that the recent poll says that Roxy is even worse than Stephanie McMahon-Margera, and we all know that's saying something. A worse BUD owner than Stephanie, damn. Yeah, Stephanie was biased, but hasn't Roxy proven to be the same? Another thing, under Stephanie's ownership, BUD may have gotten close to closing, but it never did, yet, under Roxy's reign, it closed last month. Even if she does try to pass it up as a 'break', Steph never went on a break either. She stayed true to BUD's legacy as never closing, never going on a break, never stopping, and Roxy broke that. Why? Because she wanted too."

Mikey crumbles up the contract, tossing it into the nearest trash can. He had been saving it for this moment. Otherwise it would have been torched and in the dump by now.

"By the way Roxy, I don't need your janitor job, nor my old reporting job back at the Domain. I quit this morning. I refuse to work in a place that employees people like Perez Hilton, who not only admitted he doesn't do his own stuff, but he also fails at his attempts to re-do a story that's already been done. These stories launched me into something bigger. I can get a job anywhere I want. So if you think you own me, think again."

He closes the google search page upon his laptop and clicks a folder upon the laptop. A lot of files having to do with Zarek as well as anyone in his life can be seen. Interviews, info, etc. Mikey knows his shit. He then opens up a different file, a video, one that both Zarek and Gypsy had taken when they first got together. All it is is talking, but Mikey turns to the camera to explain.

"You really don't know anything, do you, Perez? You're asking why Zarek hasn't tapped that sweet ass? I didn't even have to do any researching for this one, because they've said it so many times. No need to have great sneaking skills, only ears, which apparently you don't have. Both of said hundreds of times that their past relationships were shit, and they don't want them to go the same way. It's called taking it slow Perez, something they both agreed to do. I realize you don't know what that means, considering the rumors are you jump in the bed with anyone with a hard-on. Brian Juneau isn't Zarek's best friend, but former partner. He's already explained he has no problem with homosexuals, and is even friends with people like Brian. The two had an agreement that would not only get Brain back into the Domain, but launch Zarek to the Heavyweight title scene. Guess what, it worked."

Pushing the X at the top of the page, he closes out of everything, and spins around in his chair. Now he's looking at the camera face on. He would jump through the camera and kick Perez in the face right now if it was possible.

"You know what Perez, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you have a thing for me. Not only me, but Zarek, as well. I mean you went through all the trouble of dissecting our words, and trying to make them sound homo-erotic. That takes some skill, and why would you do that unless you had a thing for me? 'Kick your ass' is a phrase commonly used to beat somebody to the ground. Seeing how 'hard' someone is refers to how tough they are. I know you didn't know these things, since this is my world, like I said before, but now you do. Let's get something straight though, I don't swing your way Perez, and even if I did, I'd still be to good for you."

A smirk. He'd have fun tonight teaching that dumbass a lesson.

"Even if you did drop fifty pounds and learn to throw a punch, you still wouldn't be able to put me down. I'd tell you to bring your A game, but I've already seen your A game writing, so maybe you just shouldn't try at all. For your sake, I'm hopping Roxy teaches you something useful. See ya then."

He does his signature hand gesture, the one-handed pistol formation, as if he's shooting the camera.

"Shooting with Mikey" ends another world class report.