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| | From:  krissaean (Original Message) | Sent: 1/27/2007 4:22 PM |
Hello my love, your hard at work right now and Im being very lazy lol. I love you! I miss you! Im very much looking forward to watching movies together and having a nice weekend. I am sorry Glen, I am so sorry that I dont inspire trustworthiness, I know its true so please dont say I do. You past actions do affect your future, they do, so I know essp as a man it does affect you. Yes it hurts still though knowing Im not fully trusted yet, but I know that day will come, because I will work hard to earn it and I will never do anything to hurt it. Although I know as we work through this at times you will still have problems with trusting me, I know this and its so okay because we cant ever get better from something if we dont admit it and face it and accept it and then begin work on it. You cant work on something you deny is even there. So as i know for you certain things will be harder and such until we work through this and I will be extra sensitive to that, please also know, certain times I will have sensitive emotions surrounding this. Even though I can see why and know its my fault for this, it doesnt stop from hurting or from feeling upset with myself. Because I want so bad for you to totally trust and believe in me. And I know that day will come someday, I know it. Just have to get there. Ive never been trustworthy to someone, even my parents, so its not new and its not without merit, Im a tough girl and dont feel bad that you have very human and very understandable feelings and emotions my love. I promise you Glen I have never and would never intentionally do anything to cause a lack of trust or hiding anything from you. No, I dont always tell you every single thing I do or say or see online or off, but I truely feel thats a very human and okay thing, even as a couple we still will have our own stuff sometimes, (your group with Rob is an example) and thats not just so okay but I think important, that we can be okay with having little things that are ours. As long as its innocent of things that we both know would hurt the other, its natural to sometimes want and need our own "stuff" sometimes. Little things, nothing big, because we are one, we are a couple, and we share our lives all of our lives, but at the same time we should have little times or things for ourself. So I know you think I was "hiding" the fact that I talked to someone online, or that i made tags for someone, and right now you might not be able to believe different but I promise you Glen I so wasnt, I swear to you I wasnt hiding anything, I just sometimes do or did little tiny things without thinking I was hiding anything. I didnt know you had to know everything or feel it was hiding. I do now and I'll try to not instill in you more a lack of trust in that way. And I know the day will come when you fully trust me, I know it, because were soulmates, were together forever and we have many wonderful years together to work through all our problems and issues and such. We have forever together. You are the most important thing to me, and nothing matters more. I love you so much Glen, so very much. I would never intentionally hurt or cause you upset, and someday you will know this without one doubt, one worry. We'll talk more when you come home. Good talks, important to talk, to share, to share everything, even negative feelings. Dont ever be afraid to tell me ANYTHING you feel or worry or are upset over. Because Im never leaving your side, Im yours, through bad, through good, through it all, forever. I love you my man!! xxxxooooo I'll see you soon! Forever yours, Amber |
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Hey again darling, got off the phone with you and I know you dont want to be at work, I wish you werent, but you also sounded I dont know, down, upset, something? Tell me if you are, or if Im just wrong. I love you Glen, I miss you! Do you want me to not be online when your gone now? Is it bothering you? Tell me honestly. I dont want our weekend to have any stress or upsetness, I dont want you to feel anything but happy. I love you! Forever, me |
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Awww baby. I love your post. I love you so very much. I'm not upset about anything, I promise you sweety. And you know that I don't mind you being online. Please don't think that. I am your lover, friend and soulmate, not prison guard...okay? Like I said, I was up early with diarhea... been to the bathroom twice this morning and my stomache is a little queesy (sp?) Plus, it's snowing pretty heavily on this end of town, which is a bit depressing. But I promise on my life baby that I am not upset, or even giving a thought about you being online. I look forward to our weekend, even if the weather is crappy, and just being together and maybe doing some much needed sharing and communicating. I love you, and miss you. Please, please don't think anything negative, or upsetting about what I may be thinking, okay? I will see you soon darling. Forever my love for only you...me  |
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Im sorry your tummy is upset love. I hope it gets better quickly. I understand I cant wait till your home my love. I love you just as much darling. See you soon! xxoo |
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 I LOVE it.... but of course, I love you, more I think I will be leaving here very soon sweety, so I will see you soonish. I miss you.. |
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