from the inside looking out
it's what you see that i'm about
how i get lost and begin to doubt the names i feed myself
from the outside looking within
you know not how or where to begin
dissecting words to find bare bones' skin coveting denial
using the pretense of dense
i try to cover my tracks, a deliberate steadfast deference
at the expense of a mark uncovered, one letter at a time
this comfortable place where i struggle alone
keeps me weary and docile and humanity prone
it's the life that i've sown that leaves me blank and uncertain
behind my socket curtain, where i concoct
the denseness i choose to become unlocked
efforts go within myself, but to you i am still an illusion
i am twisting my thoughts to a braid
usually feeling unwelcome. i've overstayed
i tire back
to my seclusion, did not intend on intrusion
sorry
a word i over-use
apologies said for what deeds I'VE abused?
or think that i've shamed
myself in this life game, because i never learned of the rules?
i ask, is it me that is going insane?
as i've said,
i'm intense
at the
expense
of only myself
synapses scatter the insight
behind blinded eyes
second guessing,
feeling barren
yet, still, i've surmised
i am a beautiful model
for picasso's abstractions
in ALL
of my
extractions
_________________________________________________________tentatievely, © dlc 04.27.07