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Being In My Head Is Like ....Contains "mature" content, but not necessarily adult.[email protected] 
  
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Members Poetry : gothic funk
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 Message 1 of 4 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamehawaiideecee  (Original Message)Sent: 11/19/2006 8:21 AM
gothic funk
 
transfixed on that window
 
the tallest point
between two
people
one who looks away from the middle to her, i don't want to be here, left
one who's proud to be a farmer, even on portrait day, he looks at me
 
transfixed on that window
it sets the time
it bespeaks the architecture
it is graced with the curve in an arch
on a hard-edged linear home
 
curves appear in all the usual places
the cameo between the V of her collar
his glasses and the top of his head
 
and unassuming traces
the pitchfork is an arch upside-down
her chin lays out the shape of her
upside-down arch head
his is not so obvious, he looks at me
 
curves - the piping of her apron draping her frail neckline
curves - the stitching on the bib of his sturdy coveralls
his face slightly foregrounding her
 
i choose to look beyond them
 
transfixed on that window
it brings the eye upward
away from the subjects
of the portrait
 
he suddenly looks sad,
slightly pouty in his jowl
she's had tight lips all along
 
transfixed on that window
the time is late 19th century
gothic hues of black
 
a window should let the light in
but this one is covered
mourn the gothic hues
 
of a day in the life of an american
i can hear the rooster's accent cockle
woman who doesn't want to be there anymore
and a man who knows he will be
for all eternity in this gothic funk
_________________________________________________________________© dlc july 30, 2006
 
 

American Gothic
oil on beaverboard, 74.3 × 62.4 cm


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Reply
 Message 2 of 4 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameGothicAddictionSent: 11/19/2006 7:57 PM
this is really cool, I know the painting but read the poem first "didn't scroll down, honest ..lol) The cool thing was though, the way you wrote it, you don't have to see it visually, you painted a perfect picture with your words instead!
 
Well done Dee !!

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 Message 3 of 4 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknamehawaiideeceeSent: 11/19/2006 10:28 PM
the odd thing, for me anyway, i found the picture at a museum's website, snagged it and suddenly sat down and found myself writing this.  very little editing, changing... it came out pretty much as you read it. 
 
 i wish i could write like that all the time.
 
mahalo for noticing my description of that painting, i tried to capture it as best i could... there will be more to share. 
 
having a visual with poems can at times be distracting, but if done with the intention of it stressing your point or just used as an illustrative tool, as i've done here...  that is why i put the picture at the end of the poem... to let you know that what you were thinking, is right!

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 Message 4 of 4 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameGothicAddictionSent: 11/20/2006 5:00 AM
it was a good idea and kind of neat to find out that it was what I thought "without peeking" of course!

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