IF LIFE WERE NOT SO BITTER...

 

File this story under the heading: "If life were not so bitter,
revenge would not be sweet."

 

After seventeen years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for a younger
woman. The downtown luxury apartment was in his name and he wanted to
remain there with his new love, so he asked his wife to move out and
said he would buy her another place. The wife agreed to this, but
asked that she be given three days.

 

The first day she packed her personal belongings into boxes and crates
and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect
her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their
candlelit dining table, soft music playing in the background, and
feasted alone on shrimp and a bottle of Chardonnay.

 

When she had finished, she went into each room and deposited shrimp
leftovers into the hollow of her curtain rods. She then cleaned up the
kitchen and left.

 

Her husband returned with his new girl, and all was bliss for the
first few days. Then it started; slowly but surely. Clueless, the man
could not explain why the place smelled as it did.

 

They tried everything. First they cleaned and mopped and aired the
place out. That didn't work. Then they checked vents for dead rodents.
Still no luck. They steam cleaned the carpets and hung air fresheners.
That didn't solve the problem. They hired exterminators; still no
good. They ripped out the carpets and replaced them. But the smell
lingered.

 

Finally, they could take it no more and decided to move. The moving
company packed everything and moved it all to their new place.
Everything. Even the curtain rods.

 

I like the story because of the humor. But revenge is always a poor
option if we want to be healthy and happy.

 

The problem is... we can't carry a grudge and carry love in our hearts
at the same time. We have to give one of them up. It's a choice we
make.

 

Some resentments are large; they've built up over a long time and will
not be easy to part with. Some have been fed by years of pain and
anger. But all the more reason to give them up.

 

When we're tired of the anger and resentment and bitterness, we can
choose a better way. We can be forever unhappy, or we can be healthy.
We're just not made to carry a big grudge and a heart filled with
love at the same time.

 

But I still chuckle at the story.

 

Steve Goodier

 

When children try something new, they practice
over and over until they master it.  They make the
challenge of learning fun and the work of training
turns into play.

 

Unlike a child's mind, your adult mind reminds you
of the reasons why you can't do something, which
creates resistance and ultimately leads to quitting.
You end up turning back to your old ways, to
comfort zones that have nothing new to offer.
Imagine yourself as a child.  Now, how do you feel
about that new project?

 

Next time you tackle something new, adopt the
mind set of a child.  Remain open and try not to place
expectations on the outcome.  Before you know it,
you will be immersed in continual positive
reinforcement.  Success will come easily because
you are thinking like a child.

 

 

 

 

There are some assumptions that you have no choice but to make, and they can at times be helpful. Many assumptions, though, just get in the way.

When you assume that a task will be difficult, you'll likely make it even more difficult than it otherwise would have been. When you assume that something will be easy, that can lead to needless frustration and dismay when unexpected challenges arrive.

Instead of putting your energy into making assumptions, put that energy into being fully aware. Pull away the mask of your assumptions, and there is much you'll suddenly be able to see.

Rather than assuming what you'll find around the next bend, make the journey and experience what is really there. Instead of assuming how someone will be, make the effort to truly get to know that person.

When you assume, realize full well that you're doing it. And know that you could indeed be wrong.

Are there assumptions you hold that could be holding you back? Look beyond them and find much value in what is really there.

Ralph Marston