How to Make Your Husband Happy
by Debra Johanyak

Chat: Rekindling romance
Monday, February 7 @ 11:30pm Eastern

Ever wonder what it takes to make your husband happy? Scripture offers terrific insights to help wives please their spouses. From Genesis comes the teaching that women were created for the honorable role of helpers (Genesis 2:18). At the other end of the Bible is the admonition for wives to display "purity and reverence" as the most exquisite beauty (1 Peter 3:1-6). And almost squarely in the middle of the Bible is Proverbs 31, the definition of the wife of noble character.

A key verse in the Proverbs 31 passage of Scripture says, "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value" (Proverbs 31:11).

What does that mean for marriages today? "Full confidence" means complete trust. According to several Christian leaders and psychologists, here are five important ways in which women can gain their husbands' trust:

1. Sex. A husband can trust that his wife won't go out with another man, flirt, or neglect his sexual needs. He will gain the value of rejoicing in his God-given manhood, exulting in his wife's singular desire for him. Many marriage books point out that sex is often a man's primary marital need. When a wife is trustworthy in honoring, protecting, and enjoying her mate in this key area, she can bring great happiness to their union.

2. Finances. He can trust that his wife won't nag him to buy a bigger house or a newer car, and that she will show Godly stewardship in managing household income. Secure financial footing keeps a man healthy in both body and soul. Research shows that men are more likely than women to become depressed about financial pressures like losing a job or increased expenditure. Wives who work with their husbands to maintain financial integrity help soothe their husbands' worries.

3. Emotions. He can trust that his wife will maintain self-control when they disagree without making unrealistic demands on his talents or his time. Emotional instability impacts everyone in the family. A recent book title reminds us that "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." A woman who maintains self-control and balanced emotions helps to create a calm home environment. Husbands love the secure demeanor of a confident woman who's in charge of a loving, controlled household.

4. Children. He can trust that his wife will raise their children by Biblical standards and set a good example. Obedient children reflect a Godly heritage. Some men have been known to divorce their wives from embarrassment caused by undisciplined or coddled children. While such divorces are wrong, they point out the distasteful effects of unruly children on the marriage relationship.

5. Home. He can trust that his wife will share his domestic goals and values, and work with him to keep their home neat and clean. Men enjoy a peaceful and attractive home setting. A romantic bedroom is an added plus. If a man can trust his wife to help keep their home tidy and orderly, he will enjoy coming (and staying) home with her.

Many wives make these areas a priority in their families. Take comfort in knowing that when your husband trusts you in these areas of your life together, you are giving him the gift of happiness.

~ Debra Johanyak teaches college literature and writing. She helps to coordinate women's ministries at Mogadore Baptist Church in Mogadore, Ohio and provides communications consulting to local businessnes. Debra has just published her first book, Shakespeare's World (Prentice Hall, 2004).