What is a friend? Friends are people with whom you dare to be yourself. Your soul can be naked with them. They ask you to put on nothing, only to be what you are. They do not want you to be better or worse. When you are with them, you feel as a prisoner feels who has been declared innocent. You do not have to be on your guard. You can say what you think, as long as it is genuinely you. Friends understand those contradictions in your nature that lead others to misjudge you. With them you breathe freely. You can avow your little vanities and envies and hates and vicious sparks, your meannesses and absurdities, and in opening them up to friends, they are lost, dissolved on the white ocean of their loyalty. They understand. You do not have to be careful. You can abuse them, neglect them, tolerate them. Best of all, you can keep still with them. It makes no matter. They like you. They are like fire that purges to the bone. They understand. You can weep with them, sing with them, laugh with them, pray with them. Through it all - and underneath - they see, know and love you. A friend? What is a friend? Just one, I repeat, with whom you dare to be yourself.

    Job is a classic example of someone who has friends who turn against him when he is experiencing trouble. At the moment when Job's friends should have been standing by him, they brought charges against him. They assumed that God was punishing him for some secret sin he had committed. Tragically, Job found no help or hope from his friends.
    A friend will stand by a person in times of need without becoming part of the problem. Many times the easy way is to accuse or to assume guilt before all the facts are known. But a true friend will reach out to support and help in a time of need and not join in the chorus of "nay sayers."
    Jumping to a false conclusion can ruin lifelong friendships. Joe and Paul had known each other all their lives. As adults, they found themselves on apposite sides of an issue facing their town. It was an honest difference of opinion. Joe refused to even speak to Paul, but Paul continued to pray for Joe and treat him as he always had - as a friend. Years passed, and Joe came to Paul to seek restoration of the friendship, admitting that he had been wrong. Paul was forgiving, and the friendship was restored. Devoted friends never hold a grudge, even though the times or issues might divide them.