~Gary Craig

The Palace of Possibilities 2--The writing on our walls

 

We live in a Palace of Possibilities.

It is an ever expanding structure and is filled with awesome rooms and annexes that are loaded with achievements and joy.

These rooms are open to everyone, although most of us only visit a few of them. It's not that we are barred from any of the rooms.

No indeed!! They are our birthright. Rather, it's that we choose to dwell only in those rooms within which we are comfortable.

Somehow, we don't "belong" in those other, more expansive rooms.

They are for others. They are for richer people and more privileged people and people with more talent than us.

We stay within the familiar (our comfort zones) and don't venture beyond the walls (limits) of the rooms we have chosen.

Why? Because our cans and can'ts are written on those walls and we obey those dictates as though they were real.

Our incomes reflect those limits.

So does our self image.

In fact, there is scarcely any part of our makeup that is not affected by what's written on those walls.

The words on our walls are metaphors for our self talk, of course.

They represent the attitudes, opinions & beliefs that we have accumulated over the years.

Many of them are hand-me-downs from our parents, grandparents, teachers, coaches, religion, peers, books, TV and an endless list of other "authorities" in our lives.

Upon inspection (which we will do) many of them are laughable. Nonetheless, they still seem to have a hold on our progress.

We all have different words on our walls. '

That's why we appear to have different limits.

Your limits are different from mine because the "truths" written on your walls are different from the "truths" written on mine.

However, they are not really "truths" at all.

They are just the guidelines we have adopted for getting through life--AND--many of them are fictions.

They are hand-me-down beliefs that were written on our walls by others and we have been dutifully obeying them ever since.

This need not be.

This brings me to a foundational concept upon which The Palace of Possibilities is built.

It is of critical importance and underlies just about every idea we are going to explore in this series.

It should be tattooed on the insides of our eyelids so that we see it every time we blink.

Its truth is undeniable, yet it is so subtle that we tend to ignore it. Here it is:

"We constantly consult the writing on our walls."

That writing is our most prominent advisor and we consult it all day long. And why not?

It represents every experience we have ever had.

It contains all of our "how to's".

It contains our cans & can'ts as well as our shoulds & should nots.

It contains our musts & must nots as well as our sense of fair play.

It contains our version of proper behavior as well as what is right or wrong in this world.

It contains our judgments, our successes and our failures.

It's all there--everything we hold to be true--written on our walls.

For example, we eat soup with a spoon instead of a fork because our knowledge base (the writing on our walls) advises us to do so.

This is subtle, I know, but it's as if we ask the question, "How do I eat this soup?" and the writing on our walls says, "Use a spoon."

This is why we wear jeans on some occasions and black tie or evening gowns on others.

We constantly consult the writing on our walls for what to do.

Those words represent the "truth" as we have learned it.

We consult those walls for just about everything.

Those words tell us about our opportunities as well as our limits.

Often they conflict with each other.

On the subject of finances, for example, they may tell us, "This is America, the land of opportunity--go for it."

But they may also tell us....

• "You are too young (or too old) for that."
• "You don't have enough education."
• "You are a woman and are limited by the glass ceiling."
• "You are a minority."
• "People who take risks end up broke."
• "Getting ahead depends on who you know."
• "Rich people are dishonest."

This fictional list of limits goes on indefinitely, of course.

Are any of them written on your walls?

If you believe any of them--or if any of them rings true--I suggest that you have bought into an expensive "limit" that need not be there.

There is nothing inherently good or bad about money.

It is a form of energy. It can be used to finance wars and destruction OR it can be used to ease love into the hard to reach corners of the world.

We can build our own barriers to it or let it flow through us as a sign of our birthright to abundance.

All of this is dictated by the cans and can'ts written on our financial walls.

Eventually EFT will be used uniformly in business, sports, academics, spirituality and human achievements of all kinds.

This is inevitable. Accordingly, healers need to expand their visions.

They must move outside the walls of their previous rooms in the Palace of Possibilities and dwell in rooms that allow their own emotional freedom to expand with that of their clients.

I see a day when the proficient healer will engage clients and take them from the dungeon to the Palace Penthouse and beyond.

Further, I see the healer leading the way by example.

What better way to teach abundance, joy and emotional freedom than to develop new levels of it for ourselves first.

This whole series can be reduced to one sentence....

"My consistent thoughts become my reality."

It all boils down to that.

This is not new, of course. It is perhaps the most fundamental rule in all of psychotherapy.

To emphasize this, I list below a few quotes from established literature. Ladies will note (and hopefully excuse) that the male gender is used in these quotes.

That is because they came from men who, at the time, didn't know any better (smile).

• From the Bible: "As a man thinketh, in his heart so is he."
• From Ralph Waldo Emerson: "As a man thinketh, so he becomes."
• From A Course In Miracles: "The world you see is what you gave it, nothing more than that. But though it is no more than that, it is not less. Therefore, to you it is important. It is the witness to your state of mind, the outside picture of an inward condition. As a man thinketh, so does he perceive."

Although we don't often hear it stated this way,

the main goal of psychotherapy has always been to have clients change their consistent thoughts so that the quality of their lives (their reality) will shift for the better.

The primary goal has been to get clients to think differently about their traumas, fears, guilt, grief, etc.

in hopes that they will put these things "in perspective" and go about their lives more positively.

Their consistent thoughts, once changed, become their new reality.

Many clients are unaware of The Palace of Possibilities in which they live because

they dwell in their own personal dungeons amidst their thoughts of past abuses, war memories, fear, guilt and the like.

Their consistent thoughts have become their reality and, when they walk into your office, they bring their dungeons with them.

The writing on their walls provides graphic evidence of their personal guilt, shame, etc. and IT IS WRITTEN THERE IN CAPITAL LETTERS, SHOUTING AT THEM.

There is other writing, of course--even some writing of a more positive nature.

However, it is overwhelmed by those capital letters.

Those capital letters become the focus of their thinking--the centerpiece of their existence.

They have become lifetime "limits" and will continue to do so until that writing is erased and replaced.

This reminds me of "Ned," 

 Ned is the ultimate pessimist and is quite proud of it. His conversation consistently turns to the problems in his life, the world, etc.

 and, as you might expect, he has managed to manifest many problems in his reality.

By contrast, I am quite optimistic. In the eyes of some (especially Ned), I would give major competition to Pollyanna.

I am forever looking for opportunity and, interestingly enough, I seem to find it.

Ned also seems to find what he is looking for (problems). He rarely finds opportunity.

We see the world quite differently, yet we are both looking at the same world.

Even if we wentto a movie that was identical for both of us--exactly the same words, pictures, music, etc.-- we had diametrically opposed reactions.

How could this be? The only difference, of course, was what we brought to the movie.

It was our filter (our consistent thoughts) through which we perceived the events and gave them meaning (our reality).

That movie, like life, was the outer projection of an inner state.

Our experience of it was strictly an "inside job." We see life as a projection/reflection of our mind set.

Our consistent thoughts become our reality.

"Yesterday's thoughts have created your present. Today's thoughts are creating your future."

This is yet another way to say, "my consistent thoughts become my reality."

So is, "A happy face does not come by chance, it comes by happy thoughts."

See--the idea is everywhere. Think what you have always thought and you will get what you have always gotten.

We are constantly consulting the writing on our walls.

We do it all day long and the most prominently written words on our walls become our consistent thoughts (and thus our reality).

We would, of course, all like to have a better reality.

We would prefer to have more emotional freedom--to be more spiritually evolved--

to live in the more expansive annexes of our personal Palace of Possibilities.

It follows then, that the way to achieve a better reality is to change our consistent thoughts

because changing our consistent thoughts automatically changes our reality.

I am aware that this is a cognitive sort of approach and, as such, some of it is old (but powerful) stuff.

What takes us to new levels here is the combination of these tools with EFT and the energy approaches.

The tapping technologies clear away (erase) the heavy emotional stuff far more efficiently than do the cognitive approaches.

This relief, together with the creative use of cognitive type tools, allows us to more easily rewrite (replace) the words on our walls.

Once we erase the limiting words from our walls, we can replace them with whatever we want.

Erase and replace. Erase and replace. Our aim here is to approach limitlessness. Oh my!

Affirmations are the real sleepers in our Personal Performance Toolkit and we are about to wake them up.

To some people affirmations are considered useless and to others they just plain suck.

To many they represent a good idea that, unfortunately, doesn't deliver on its promises.

Many people have tried them but quit because "They don't work!"

In truth, however, they do work and work superbly.

They are highly reliable (perhaps more reliable than any other tool) and do, indeed, manifest in people's lives that which is affirmed.

Now listen up! This is a critical

Affirmations seem to be ineffective only because there is a missing piece to the affirmation process that has gone mostly unrecognized.

It has to do with what is actually affirmed.

This is often NOT the affirmation that is stated.

In fact, it is frequently the opposite.

Our affirmations are impressive in their ability to shape our lives.

If we will but listen to our own self talk we will hear glowing evidence of this.

Our self talk contains constant affirmations regarding our existing beliefs and attitudes.

So does our every day conversation.

These affirmations have brought us to the current status in our lives and confined us within our own limiting rooms in The Palace of Possibilities.

To truly harness the power of affirmations, we must make sure the actual affirmations that are taking effect are the ones we want.

Therein lies our major challenge and an indispensable use for EFT.

Here's an example of what I mean.

Let's say a 200 pound woman uses an affirmation aimed at weighing 130. She might affirm something like this...

"My normal weight is 130 pounds and that's what I weigh."

The logic here is that if she keeps repeating that affirmation she will perform a form of mental conditioning.

As a result, she will begin to see herself differently and will naturally adjust her food intake and exercise habits to permanently achieve this new weight level.

Properly done, there would be no will power involved.

Her life habits would simply evolve to someone who behaved as a 130 pound woman.

But most people don't have this experience.

Why? Because the affirmation they are stating is not the "true" affirmation. You see, the stated affirmation often has competition within the person's system.

That competing affirmation gets tagged on at the tail end of the stated affirmation in a subtle, yet powerful, way and becomes the "true" affirmation.

For example, our 200 pound woman who says, "My normal weight is 130 pounds and that's what I weigh"

 is likely to have one or more "tail enders" show up at the end of her affirmation. They might go like this...

• "But if you lose the weight, others will expect you to keep it off."
• "But if you lose the weight, you will have to spend a lot of money for new clothes."
• "But if you lose the weight, men will hit on you and expect sex."
• "But if you lose the weight, men won't hit on you and then you will know you aren't loveable.
• "But if you lose the weight, you will have to give up your favorite foods."

This list of tail enders is endless. These are just examples.

They are not spoken or articulated, of course, but are subtle (and powerful) reflections of the existing obstacles for losing weight.

Can they be eventually overridden by the persistent use of the affirmation? Probably.

However, it's a rare person who will keep up this persistence. Why?

Because first, they are not seeing any immediate results and, second,

they feel uncomfortable with the emotional discord that goes on between the stated affirmation and the competing tail enders.

They often conclude that they are lying to themselves and just give up.

As you can see, the affirmation process usually needs help. It needs EFT to erase those existing tail enders.

This brings us to one of the truly powerful aspects of affirmations, namely, that once an affirmation is truly installed, it is not easily moved.

It becomes a permanent part of your persona until you replace it.

For example, those tail end affirmations for our 200 pound woman have taken up residence within her system.

They are entrenched. They are written on her walls and have become her consistent thoughts which, of course, have become her reality.

They are stubborn and are not about to be easily "talked away" with an unaided new affirmation.

That would be like trying to topple the Empire State Building with a piece of limp spaghetti.

She sees herself as a 200 pound woman--and that's it!

Her weight is a reflection of her existing affirmations--the writing on her walls.

The good news here is that once the new "130 pound affirmation" truly takes place, it becomes the new consistent thought

and is just as obstinate as the previous "200 pound tail enders" which it replaced.

To gain weight back would be inconsistent with the newly resident consistent thoughts.

If we listen to ourselves talk, we will hear our "limits" and other forms of affirmations come rolling out of our faces. Things like...

• "I can't sing,"
• "Making money isn't spiritual,"
• "Women can't compete in a man's world,"
• "I never seem to find the right words," etc. etc. etc.
• I never have enough time
• my family is always needing me for something 

...serve as affirmations that keep us right where we are.

Affirmations are powerful, very powerful.

We are using them every minute of the day.

They shape our lives because they reflect our beliefs and our attitudes.

You are using them right now as you read this.

You are consulting the writing on your walls (your existing affirmations) to agree or disagree with what I am saying.

Have you found yourself saying, "Yes, but..." while reading this? If so, you are affirming something, probably a limit.

This is why I said earlier that affirmations....

"...are highly reliable (perhaps more reliable than any other tool) and do, indeed, manifest in people's lives that which is affirmed."

There is no question that properly installed affirmations work very powerfully.

The only trick here is to make sure that the affirmation that you really want is the true affirmation.

This is where EFT comes in.

 It serves as a highly effective eraser for all the negative emotions & beliefs that serve as competing tail enders.

With the skillful use of EFT, each and every block to personal performance can be eliminated,

thereby providing a clean wall on which to write our new consistent thoughts.

Erase and replace. Erase and replace. Once the competition is gone, the affirmation will have clear sailing. T

his is exciting. It is transformational.

This combination of EFT and affirmations allows us to completely re-engineer our systems.

It allows us to erase our blocks and install our dreams. Finances can flourish.

Friendships can flower. And personal peace can proliferate.

Until now EFT has been a stand-alone eraser of pain without any means to install dreams.

Affirmations, on the other hand, have been a stand-alone tool for installing dreams but without an eraser for the competing tail enders.

Now we can blend both tools together and take ourselves & our clients into the more glorious rooms of the Palace of Possibilities.

I love people who pursue their possibilities.

I love people with dreams. They make things happen. They lead by example. Doesn't that make your juices run?

As children, we made great use of our imaginations.

There were no limits. We could fly. We could become Cinderella or Superman at a moment's notice.

We could even imagine living in a Palace, maybe even a Palace of Possibilities (ahem!). What fun!

Whatever we imagined became our own creations.

Sooner or later, however, someone came along and squashed our imaginations by writing on our walls things like...

• "Quit spending your time in fantasy land and get real."
• "Get your head out of the clouds!"
• "Quit dreaming. You'll never be able to live out those things."

Most of us bought this "advice" and don't daydream much any more.

Too bad. Why? Because the purposeful use of daydreaming is one of the most powerful devices we have for moving freely through the Palace of Possibilities.

When combined with affirmations, goals and EFT, daydreams become a magnet which draws us ever forward into the excitement of our tomorrows.

We still have the use of our imaginations and can use them to create fabulous futures. We just need to dust them off.

Please note the ideas that...

1. The brain does not distinguish between what is real and what is vividly imagined.

This allows us to condition our minds with the purposeful use of daydreaming.

We can actually create experiences (as though they were real) that were not there before.

2. Dreams do not necessarily come true but they DO take us in directions.

Let's start with an exercise. Please take everything out of your hands and sit back in your chair.

Hold your hand out in front of you and imagine you are holding a lemon that has been cut in half.

Hold the lemon so you can see the exposed juicy part.

Use your imagination as vividly as you can and feel the texture of the lemon with your fingertips.

Notice the little indent marks on the outer peel as well as the oily feel. Can you feel that?

Now bring it up to your nose and smell it. [ inhales] Can you smell it?

Okay. Bring it back down.

Next, I'm going to have you bite into this lemon.

To do this correctly and get the true purpose behind this exercise, you must put your vivid imagination into it.

That means you must really chomp into this lemon.

Not a little nibble. I want you to really bite it. Ready?

One, two, three, bite...ah-hh and chew it, okay?

Do it like this, agh, agh.

Okay...take it out.

How many of you noticed that you salivated?

 Oh, most of you. That's because you really involved your imaginations. You vividly imagined it.

"The brain does NOT distinguish between what is real and what is vividly imagined."

We are going to make great use out of that idea because the whole daydreaming process relies on that one concept.

Do you want the new weight? Imagine it first.

Do you want to install the new health practice? Imagine it first.

Do you want the new Rolls Royce?

 Imagine yourself sitting behind the wheel and driving it and putting gas in it and paying the bills on it as though they were nothing to you.

Imagine the "new you"....vividly....and your own brain will start taking you in that direction.

After a while, you won't be satisfied with where you were.

You will reach the new vision of yourself and will behave in a manner to bring it about.

Before we proceed, let's look at where we have been.

We have established that we live in a Palace of Possibilities

but tend to stay in rooms whose limits are written on our walls in the form of cans, can'ts, shoulds, shouldn'ts, etc.

 These are our existing affirmations (which we constantly consult) and serve to keep us where we are.

They are our consistent thoughts which have become our reality.

If we are to have a new reality (weight, health, relationships, business, money, spirituality, etc.),

we must first establish new consistent thoughts.

Our true goals (WANTS, not SHOULDS) can be put in affirmation form and written on our walls.

This will move us toward a new reality *if* the competing tail enders are erased by EFT.

Once the competition is gone, the affirmations have a clear path to bring about new empowerment.

The purposeful use of our imaginations, or daydreaming, adds substantial oomph to the process.

now, I am laying the foundation so that we have a common understanding on which to build.

Our time is up for tonight, but we will continue on Tuesday. Until then I'd like you to think about what things are written on your walls and what you would LIKE to have written on them.

 

Use the EFT technique to help erase those negative old things and affirmations to replace them on your newly cleaned walls.

 

Next time we will be sharing experiences with how using affirmations worked and covering Abundance issues, percieved money barriers, and self empowerment.

 

I'll look forward to seeing you then ...Goddess Bless