Q. My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you!
Knowing that there is only one of you he can only
settle for the next best thing, your best friend. Far
from being an issue, this can bring you closer together.
Why not get some of your old college roommates
involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you
should let him be with your friends without you. If
you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him

and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.


Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it! Semen can help you lose weight and gives a
great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this.
His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is
totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best
thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a
day; then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

A: This is perfectly natural behaviour and it should
be encouraged. The Man is a hunter and he needs to
prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing
young single girls is a great stress relief and can
foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember,
nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the
man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to
clean the house too)! Just look at how emotional and
happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The
best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your
best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him
a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If
you must mess with it, do it in your own time or ask
your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape
yourself while doing this, and present it to your
husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish
guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a
delicious meal.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should
seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very
stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available
to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for
foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your
man as much as you should; He should never have to
work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish!
Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral
sex on him and cooking him a nice meal.

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and
goes to sleep without giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps
you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.