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DON'T MESS WITH MOM
>> > >
>> > > My son came home from school one day,
>> > > with a smirk upon his face.
>> > > He decided he was smart enough,
>> > > to put me in my place.
>> > >
>> > > "Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
>> > > that's taught by Mr. Wright?
>> > > It's all about the laws today,
>> > > The 'Children's Bill of Rights.'
>> > >
>> > > It says I need not clean my room,
>> > > don't have to cut my hair
>> > > No one can tell me what to think,
>> > > or speak, or what to wear.
>> > >
>> > > I have freedom from religion,
>> > > and regardless what you say,
>> > > I don't have to bow my head,
>> > > and I sure don't have to pray.
>> > >
>> > > I can wear earrings if I want,
>> > > and pierce my tongue & nose.
>> > > I can read & watch just what I like,
>> > > get tattoos from head to toe.
>> > >
>> > > And if you ever spank me,
>> > > I'll charge you with a crime.
>> > > I'll back up all my charges,
>> > > wi th the marks on my behind.
>> > >
>> > > Don't you ever touch me,
>> > > my body's only for my use,
>> > > not for your hugs and kisses,
>> > > that's just more child abuse.
>> > >
>> > > Don't preach about your morals,
>> > > like your Mama did to you.
>> > > That's nothing more than mind control,
>> > > And it's illegal too!
>> > >
>> > > Mom, I have these children's rights,
>> > > so you can't influence me,
>> > > or I'll call Children's Services Division,
>> > > better known as C.S.D."
>> > >
>> > > Of course my first instinct was
>> > > to toss him out the door.
>> > > But the chance to teach him a lesson
>> > > made me think a little more.
>> > >
>> > > I mulled it over carefully,
>> > > I couldn't let this go.
>> > > A smile crept upon my face,
>> > > he's messing with a pro.
>> > >
>> > > Next day I took him shopping
>> > > at the local Goodwill Store.
>> > > I told him, "Pick out all you want,
>> > > there's shirts & pants galore.
>> > >
>> > > I've called and checked with C.S.D.
>> > > who said they didn't care
>> > > if I bought you K-Mart shoes
>> > > instead of those Nike Airs.
>> > > I've canceled that appointment
>> > > to take your driver's test.
>> > > The C.S.D. is unconcerned
>> > > so I'll decide what's best."
>> > >
>> > > I said "No time to stop and eat,
>> > > or pick up stuff to munch.
>> > > And tomorrow you can start to learn
>> > > to make your own sack lunch.
>> > >
>> > > Just save the raging appetite,
>> > > and wait till dinner time.
>> > > We're having liver and onions,
>> > > a favorite dish of mine."
>> > >
>> > > He asked "Can I please rent a movie,
>> > > to watch on my VCR?"
>> > > "Sorry, but I sold your TV,
>> > > for new tires on my car.
>> > >
>> > > I also rented out your room,
>> > > you'll take the couch instead.
>> > > The C.S.D. requires
>> > > just a roof over your head.
>> > >
>> > > Your clothing won't be trendy now,
>> > > I'll choose what we eat.
>> > > That allowance that you used to get,
>> > > will buy me something neat.
>> > >
>> > > I'm selling off your jet ski,
>> > > dirt-bike & roller blades.
>> > > Check out the 'Parents Bill of Rights',
>> > > It's in effect today!
>> > >
>> > > Hey hot shot, are you crying,
>> > > Why are you on your knees?
>> > > Are you asking God to help you out,
>> > > instead of C.S.D..?"
>> > >
>> > > from a MOM (Mean Old Mother.)
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