Hi Rosie, 
I finally got over here to read this!!... And what a joy it was.
Wow... what a life you've had. Lots of sorrow and pain mixed in with the love. I'm so glad things finally worked out for the good in the neighborhood for you. I have such respect for people of other races who have shown such strength of character and heart to go through and survive the wrongs done to them. I often feel so disconnected from "life's realities" having not ever be through such attacks... because I realise I have never had to fight for my identity. It was handed to me, and never questioned or denied, never ridiculed or put down. (although I did enough of that on my own to myself for being poorer than some of our other relatives.. yet in reality, not really poor at all.)
I'm also happy for you that you were able to have a wonderful relationship with your mother in her latter years. If only as children we were able to know how to ask those all important questions... and share our needs and feelings... and get those things in the open sooner.
I could identify often with the description of your mother. It was kind of like that for me..... she was not 'loving' towards me in the usual sense. Not a lot of cuddling or hugs etc. When I got sick, daddy tended me. Daddy tucked me in at night and made the blankets secure on cold nights. They both died before I got old enough and mature enough to appreciate who they were and all that they did do for us kids... and so I was never able to express it to them, or have a 'good' mature/fun relationship with them. I was such a self centered person... still battle that sin to this day too. And some 27 years since they passed it still breaks my heart to think of what we missed out on.. the better kind of relationships we might have been able to have. Yet, so many had so much worse than I did.... I am only grateful for all. And thankful I learned my own faults and mistakes in time to attempt to be a better parent and grandparent.
I'm looking forward to the next chapter! Grace 
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