I wanted to send some sort of Festive greeting, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on his advice I wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes  for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress,  non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice 
holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious  persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the  religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their
choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and  medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally  accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society  have helped make our country great (not to imply that America is  necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual
preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely  transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies  no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for
her/himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is  revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted  to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings  for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

 Regards,