BIRTH ORDER OF
CHILDREN
Your Clothes:
1st baby: You begin
wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your
pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your
regular clothes for as long as
possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity
clothes ARE your regular clothes.
_____________________________________________________
Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby:
You practice your breathing
religiously.
2nd baby: You don't
bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a
thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an
epidural in your eighth month.
______________________________________________________
The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash
newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's
little bureau.
2nd baby: You check
to make sure that th! e clothe s are clean and discard only the ones with the
darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can
wear pink, can't they?
______________________________________________________
Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign
of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the
baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up
when her wails threaten to wake your
firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your
three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical
swing.
______________________________________________________
Pacifier:
1st baby: If the pacifier
falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil
it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier
falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's
bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on
your shirt and pop it back in.
______________________________________________________
Diapering:
1st baby: You change your
baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or
not.
2nd baby: You change their
diaper every two to three hours, if
needed.
3rd baby: You try to change
their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it
sagging to their knees.
______________________________________________________
Activities:
1st baby: You take your
infant to Baby Gymnastics , Baby Swing, and Baby Story
Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant
to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You
take your infant to the supermarket and the dry
cleaner.
_____________________________________________________
_
Going
Out:
1st baby: The first time you
leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five
times.
2nd baby: Just before you
walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be
reached.
3rd baby: You leave
instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees
blood.
______________________________________________________
At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good
bit of every day just gazing at the
baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of
everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or
hitting the baby.
3rd
baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the
children.
______________________________________________________
Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st
child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and
demand x-rays.
2nd child: When
second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to
pass.
3rd child: When third child
swallows a coin you deduct it from his
allowance!
______________________________________________________
Pass this on to everyone you know who has children . . . or everyone who KNOWS
someone who has had children .
(The older the mother, the funnier this is!)
GRANDCHILDREN:
God's reward for
allowing your children to live!!!
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