Three Holy Men and a Bear

   A priest, a Pentecostal preacher, and a rabbi all served as
chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University in
Marquette. They would get together two or three times a week for
coffee and to talk shop.

   One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They
would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and
attempt to convert it.

   Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their
experience.

   Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and
had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. "Well," he
said, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him,
I began to read to him from theCatechism. Well, that bear wanted
nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly
grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he
became as gentle as a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give
him first communion and confirmation."

   Reverend Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and
both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best
fire-and-brimstone oratory, he claimed, "WELL, brothers, you KNOW
that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I
began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me.

   So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one
hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I
quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you
said, he became as gentle as a lamb.

   We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."

   The priest and the reverend both looked down at the rabbi, who was
lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs
and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
The Rabbi looked up and said, "Looking back on it, circumcision may
not have been the best way to start."

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