CLR,
i dont know you really well, but i know a bit about what you are going through, moodwise. i crash pretty hard at times myself, and the only thing that works sometimes is just riding out the feelings, not acting on the thoughts, and some days that may mean living hour by hour or even minute by minute. the panic attcks are the worst, sometimes..
this community is a place to vent, so feel free to post your thoughts and feelings anytime, there is usually someone around who can relate. i have read your poems, and they are very good, i know for me, poems/writing are a way to relieve the pressure, also, just getting up and doing something helps.
i am sorry i didnt read this earlier, and reply, but please know those negative thoughts and feelings do go away, i know it may not seem like they will ever let up, but they do. take care and post again soon.
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