The Sanguin Chalis Inn

You know your coven is getting old when...

The ritual feast is pureed.
Last Beltaine, the coven decided it would be nice to go out to dinner to celebrate.
The last time you tried to do a spiral dance, your oxygen feeds got tangled.
Viagra is kept in the coven supplies.
The maiden of the coven is a grandmother.
The ritual room is outfitted with defibrillators.
The coveners drive their RV’s to Scottsdale, AZ for Mabon.
When you are at a festival, you go to bed at sunset.
It takes the whole coven to move the cauldron.
The High Priest still has a vendetta going against Richard Nixon.
You find yourself using your pendulum over the stock pages in the newspaper.
You tell an initiate that in your day you had to slog through 5 feet of snow uphill both ways when you did a Yule ritual.
You drop your teeth in the ritual cup.
At Samhain, you see more of your coveners in the Wild Hunt than you do in circle.
You put your athame in the chalice during ritual, but you can’t remember why.
You hold an all-night blow-out drum frenzy and none of your neighbors noticed.
You use Glen Miller records for trance music.
All of your ritual robes are tie-died.
Your coven has a 401(k) retirement plan.
A nitro pill vial replaces the crystal on your pendant.