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Since we have some PINK RAYGUN fans I fihured to put the ladies recaps in their own threads. That way you do not have to keep looking in the TV thread recaps and have one place for them. If the show has a thread, you will find it there as well... tick Here is PINK RAYGUNS RECAP on last nights.... SMALLVILLE..... “Is he a pig? He sure eats like one.�?- Gertie, E.T. By TinityVixen If I’d bothered to find out the title of this episode in advance, I might have spoiled the fairly surprising ending. Ignorance = 1, Knowledge = 0. When last we left what we call, for lack of a better term, our hero, Clark was in the Fortress facing a smackdown from Jor-El over yet another act of disobedience. I wonder if Jor-El ever turns his all-seeing eye inwards to realize that the failure of the dog to obey might, in fact, be the failure of the owner to inspire authority. In Jor-El’s defense, it is rather hard to be dominating when you’re only a voice from a dead world. Lights go up, and Clark disappears into Jor-El’s punishment. Let’s hope it works better than the last one he dreamt up; making Clark human worked out so that he could bone Lana, which hardly seems a punishment to anyone but the audience.
In terms us pitiful humans can understand, Clark is absent without leave from his many significant female others for two weeks. Chloe’s frantic, as she actually gives two shits about his welfare and what her implausibly perilous world is likely to do while he is away. Lois is imperious and dismissive, as she is too busy continuing the least clandestine secret relationship with a boss ever. Lana assumes Clark’s prolonged vacation is a Kryptonian time-out after Clark got sketched by her stalking of Lex. As usual, only Chloe will suffer for Clark’s absence because, obviously, no one cares if she does. This time around, Chloe’s a walking time bomb as a loony janitor threatens Lois with some explosive C4-on-cousin if she doesn’t print a wildly unprintable, libelous story about Lex Luthor. That must suck for Lois, as she’s already trying to print a libelous story about Lex and not getting as far as she’d like. Having a maniac working through her to get at Lex gets her farther on her story than her non-existent reporting skills, which must really grind her gears. Repeated failure seems to have gotten stuck up her nose, much like a sinus infection (this is the only possible explanation for why her awful nose job has gone unnoticed by everyone else).
Meanwhile, Chloe figures out too late that she’s toting more than a gift card to Target in her Secret Santa present to stop Jimmy from getting in the elevator with her. The villain-of-the-week seals up the elevator car with the bomb and certain doom. Naturally, they assume the worst as one: this is Smallville (okay, Metropolis, but still Kansas); and two: their fate lies in Lois�?hands. Chloe comes clean to Jimmy about her meteor freak side. The revelation drops more anvils about their sustained mutual affection than when Chloe dropped the contents of her purse–including candids of her and Jimmy in happier times–all over the elevator floor. They get their freak on while the bomb counts down to doom. Doom has been brought to us by the letters C, L, O, N, E, and S. Dun-dun-dun! Instead of Julian Luthor’s sudden appearance being really, really bad ret-conning of the Luthor family drama to date, it is instead really, really cliché plotting! The man threatening Lois is an early attempt at cloning Julian, and when Lois fails at her task of begging Lex to incriminate himself for no reason whatsoever, the kidnapper faces both Luthors and lets Julian in on the secret. Blah blah blah angst fest, and the kidnapper is dead while Lex tries to convince his brother that the crazy man was just that, who only coincidentally knew all of Julian’s memories as his own. Yeah, that’s some good Luthor Kool Aid, but Julian ain’t thirsty. In the background, where he works best (as befits the star of the show), Clark returns to Kansas from the Fortress a changed man. He decides to reconcile with Lana’s darker impulses by giving into them completely. After all, if they both are obsessed with Lex, then the only thing that could bring them closer together is to share that obsession. Lana, who’d been prepared to drop her vendetta, is confused by this development but swayed by the newly eloquent and humbled Clark. At this point, I was sure Jor-El mind-wiped his idiot son, threw his own brain into the mix, and emerged ready to carry on his agenda at long friggin�?last.
The new and improved Kal-El hears Chloe and Jimmy’s ticking time bomb in time to throw it off the top of the Planet’s roof. Jimmy asks no questions about this whatsoever. His mind is all on Chloe’s ability when she shows him that she can heal cuts and scrapes (at a cost to herself), and they end the episode with more out in the open and, somehow, less. Chloe refuses to test those waters again and brings up Jimmy’s poor new girlfriend. Seeing as Kara’s been gone at least as long as Clark, I wouldn’t assume she was still my girlfriend, were I Jimmy, but compared to the track record of disclosure amongst couples on this show, I think a two-week span of dead air counts as a commitment ceremony. Chloe and Jimmy, to be continued? Perhaps, but Lois and Julian are through. Having seen what the ElderClone Julian went through, the man who would be Grant Gabriel breaks it off with Lois. Right at Christmas, too, which can be superceded in douchebaggery only by breaking up with someone on Valentine’s Day, the equally manufactured but more love-specific Hallmark Holiday.
Surprisingly, Clark and Lana come out…ahead! There are no awkward pauses or even many long refusals to make eye contact (since he can’t have changed that much, there are still a few). Now that they share the real passion that unites them-hating Lex Luthor so very, very much-Clark and Lana are the happiest they’ve ever been. Well, Brainiac might come back because part of him never died and is slowly learning through the body he took over how to turn himself back into a full-bodied being again, and Clark is really Bizarro, but still! They’re happy! It’s a miracle! God Bless Us, Every One!
Yes, it turns out Clark’s turn for the mature is all an insidiously genius feint on behalf of last half-season’s baddie, the phantom zone creature that took on Clark’s form. (Back at the Fortress, Jor-El has the real deal encased in an ice casket, hopefully for the purposes of forcible education that might lead Clark to be half as cool and collected as his doppelganger.) Color me impressed: this makes Bizarro the first baddie to really make a comeback after his weeks of build up and instantaneous defeat. More than that, I could see how he’s pulling the wool over on people. Assuming that Clark’s been learning to be better than a pile of pretty cheekbones and pouty faces, everyone thinks his transformation to be Jor-El induced. And, let’s face it, even when he destroys the world because of being so damned sneaky, there are going to be at least some among Clark’s friends who’ll defend the Bizarro version. “I don’t care that he wiped humanity off the face of the Earth. I’m telling you, he was smarter; he played well with others; he listened; he kept the angst to a minimum; and gosh darn it, he was cuter. I think we can let him destroy one little species.�?/P> Or maybe that’s just me. I’m really impressed with Bizarro’s subtlety and cunning. Every responsibility you’d ever wished Clark would take seriously, Bizarro does. Even the agonizing ones, like romancing Lana, he gets right. Imagining seven seasons of Bizarro going through Clark’s life actually causes me physical pain for thinking how much crap we might have avoided were that the case. By now, Bizarro would have been married to Lana (or, better still, killed her), Chloe would be unanimously elected President of Being Foxy for life, and Lex’s skin would be a rug in the Fortress�?romper room. If Bizarro and Milton Fine team up, pucker up, world! It’s time to kiss your ass goodbye! |
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By Lisa Fary Cake didn’t try hard enough to fix everything. Maybe cake could have prevented Sylar from launching into the worst spoken word performance ever. Had a slice of cake been shoved in his hand, perhaps he would have lost interest in playing Saw with the Company gang.
Although, even cake probably couldn’t have saved another black character, Knox, from certain death. As much as I dig President Worf, I’m not going to get too attached. Michael Dorn is black and this is Heroes. At least one thing President Worf isn’t going to have to worry about is getting shot by Peter Petrelli. Hey, Peter! You and a gun? Not threatening. Here’s a hint: pull the trigger. Future!Peter could do that. Present!Peter did once, too. Remember in the Haitian jungle? All those guerrillas? Oh, wait. Those guys were all black. Maybe President Worf should worry if Peter comes around with a gun. In the meantime, President Worf has given the Flying Senator the go ahead to build a prison for the supers. So, in the space of a single episode, Nathan Petrelli went from Superpowers will save the world! Let’s give ‘em to the Marines! to Concentration camps will rocket me to the presidency! Nathan’s only Super Marine, played by stuntcasting guest star Chad Faust, was killed within minutes, now that the obligatory nod toward The 4400 has been made as well as dumped on the floor and set on fire, but not before giving Mohinder a much needed exfoliation. That was disappointing (the death, not the beauty treatment) because that kid had the potential to be a really scary attack dog to carry out Nathan’s evil plan. But, Chad Faust was too much of a reminder that the Red Promicin storyline was lifted from basic cable. Heroes, if we’re going to stuntcast, let’s stuntcast (and move away from the Star Trek co-stars). Here are some guest stars I’d like to see in volume four and beyond: Clancy Brown. His imposing size and voice get him typecast as the villain most of the time. Let’s see him play against type as a good guy. Ron Glass from Firefly. Let’s try not killing him off. Ernie Hudson. Come on. You know you want to see a Ghostbuster on Heroes. Let’s try not killing him off, either. Bruce Campbell. As himself. With superpowers. Carrie Fisher. The Heroes girls need a mentor to show them how to be strong, how to be their own people, how to have their own thoughts, and if necessary, how to turn a bikini into an instrument of death. Carrie Fisher, superpowered or not, should play that role. She could co-mentor the Heroes girls with Gina Torres, who hopefully won’t get killed off. How about it, Heroes? |
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By TrinityVixen “Allllllll riiiiiiiggghhhttt!! It’s nine in the pee-em, I’m Gabriel Gray, and you’re rocking out to KPWR’s non-stop vengeance block! There’s still time to call in and request a person you would like to have me smite on air!�?/SPAN> Volume Three, Chapter Thirteen �?“Dual�?/EM> Watch the opener of this episode and tell me that’s an exaggeration. I dare you. Sylar leads us over the loftily philosophical starting monologue. (I assume Sendhil Rammamurthy had laryngitis that day?) He wants to play a little game. Some people are so ungrateful just to be alive�?/SPAN> Ooh, I beg your pardon; I’ve gotten this episode confused with the Saw movies. Can’t imagine how that happened. Having Sylar, who was most notorious for moving in for quick, efficient kills before they neutered him, suddenly act out a death game for the players at Primatech (Angela Petrelli, Mr. Bennet, Claire, and Meredith) is another swerving turn in this frequently derailed “volume.�?Don’t get me wrong, having Sylar be a knock-off Jigsaw is still preferable to him being a good boy. I just didn’t know that you could make more than one 180-degree turn in a story and not just wind up exactly where you were. I suppose if you move through a three-dimensional Cartesian system, you can. But that would suppose that this show is capable of constructing three-dimensional characters, which is, frankly, unsupported by the evidence of at least two, if not all three of the volumes so far. In Sylar’s Primatech playground, his on-going obsession with Claire merges with his desire for revenge on Angela for lying to him about being his mommy. Either Claire pops Angela in the face with a shotgun, or Daddy Bennet bites it. Sylar leaves Claire to decide which one she’ll protect at the expense of the other. (“Live or die: make your choice.�?/EM>) All the while, as he admits to her when he tracks her down himself, Sylar is aware that it’s a foregone conclusion that Claire will save Mr. B over Angela. This would appear to make trying to force her into a damned-if-she-does-and-damned-if-she-doesn’t situation sort of pointless, really. Maybe he’s turned on by her comment that he needs a spanking. (Claire, like me, readily volunteers to handle that particular duty. And Sylar must approve because he immediately calls her after she issues the idle threat to turn all twenty feet of him over her tiny knees.) Also, since he’s used to sneak-attack decapitations, it’s no surprise that Sylar is really bad at setting up his death traps. Mr. Bennet unlocks the cages in Level 5 and sets some bad guys after the Big Bad Sylar with the promise of freedom in exchange for Sylar’s head. (Mr. Bennet isn’t trapped in a building with Sylar: Sylar is trapped in tight quarters with Mr. Bennet.) The Puppetmaster tries to control Sylar and gets his brain blended out his nose. It must be the height of insult that Sylar doesn’t bother to take his powers. And why should he? Sylar’s will is more supernaturally strong than the guy whose entire power is suggestion. All this so Sylar can just hit Meredith up with some adrenaline and lock her in a cell with Bennet and one bullet to prove to Claire that Mr. B isn’t a nice guy. (Duh, dude.) And Claire still goes to save him. When Claire can thwart your death trap, it’s time to throw in the towel. Meredith explodes, probably dying in the process, but Claire, Mr. Bennet and Angela are well clear of the building when it happens. Because not only has Sylar lost track of how simple plans are always better than complicated ones vis a vis homicide, but he let Claire sneak up on him and stick him in the sweet spot. Sylar finds out Angela knows who his real parents are and then bang! Dead (-ish). But yes, he’s still vulnerable in the parents. Bottom line: Primatech is gone, and the survivors are on the run. It’s not a good day for the Petrelli legacy in general because across the city, Pinehearst’s futures are also going up in smoke. Peter teams with Knox and Flint (I know!) to take out Pinehearst’s supply of the Formula before any more soldiers can get the Kyle Baldwin treatment. Mohinder, not dying fast enough from his out-of-control mutation, screams at Peter about how he’s teamed with monsters and murderers in pursuit of eliminating the Formula. Funny how the guy who kidnapped people and sticky-tacked them to the walls of his laboratory thinks he has moral high ground under his scaly feet–against Peter Paragon, no less. Mohinder gets some stuffing knocked out of him and is then bathed in the Formula when Peter and Flint decide to spill it on the floor and set it on fire. So much for Peter’s disgust at his new compatriot’s bloodthirstiness: he doesn’t even seem to notice that Suresh is left behind when he flies the coop. Yes, flies. Nathan has a taken a turn for the megalomaniacal; he’s ready to turn the world super by hook or by crook. Or by pipe! I confess I enjoyed Nathan beating the tar out of Peter with a giant pipe. Of course, Nathan’s sudden, neck-breaking turn for the wicked has to come to a bad end: he is trapped in the flames as the Formula burns and Peter must dose himself in order to save his brother. Miles away, Peter lands so Nathan can then call shenanigans on Peter’s moral stance against the Formula. Peter pretends to be ashamed; the show doesn’t blame him because he did it to save Nathan (whom he still loves because PETER IS AWESOME). Nathan, who would not have been so generous were the tables turned, says as much and gets to look like a total douche. (Oh, and Mohinder escaped and is totally fine now and riding with Tracey to destinations unknown, thanks for asking. Srsly u guys.) In the preview for Volume Four, Nathan decides to narc on the heroes. Why, yessir, Mr. President, sir, Nathan will go fascist on his super-brothers and –sisters and help round them up into camps. This show really hates Nathan for no reason at all except that it adores Peter and wants to exploit the brother vs. brother narrative for at least thirteen more seasons. (Please, Nathan’s God, I’m begging you: NO.) At least the show is finally moving in the right direction. For starters, they’re burning off extraneous characters and plot devices. (Sometimes literally. Rest in fiery peace, Meredith. Have fun in frosty Hell, Knox.) The Formula and all the insanity it has unleashed are gone forever, much like the Shanti virus. (The what?) Except not because Formula-created supers Nathan, Tracey (and possibly another of her sisters), Mohinder, Ando (there are no humans left besides Mr. Bennet at this point), and Peter all still have powers as a result of this plot travesty. “La-la-la can’t hear you, Ms. Continuity, you’ll have to try again when we’re not all stupid here. Bryan Fuller should be back soon. He can help you then.�?/SPAN> I realize sarcasm is difficult to parse some times, so I will admit up front I didn’t hate this ridiculousness. It was almost campy and it was definitely fun. They touched briefly on deeper things—the nature of time travel, why supers get the powers they do (hint: Daphne thinks it has to do with the problems they face in their lives before the powers activate), the stupidity of setting companies against companies instead of people against people—most of which will probably be ignored in the new year. However, as the last two episodes have been surprisingly less awful than the rest of the season so far, I’m prepared to be fair about the show’s chances of turning the Titanic around. I hereby resolve not to hate this show in advance and dread its airing every week as I have done for the past three months. That’s the best I can do. Happy Holidays, one and all. See you in Volume Four. |
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By Sonia Aurora This week: Orlando Jones! I’m trying to muster up the love here, but to be quite honest this was not one of the season’s strongest eps and knowing it’s also one of its last just made it harder to bear. We did learn a few nifty nuggets in the interwoven history of the Pushing Daisies World, notably how Ned came to resurrect the dead for answers. Coming across a dead (and shot) lumberjack, he believes resurrecting him and finding his killer will make him a hero, and prompt his father to come for him to the School for Boys which he’s been banished to. Alas, it was an accident, even if the sheriff doesn’t believe him, and no visit from dad materializes. And so we now have Ned who still does the resurrection trick, and call me impatient, but as the bell tolls I’d really like to see how Emerson and Ned hooked up in their detecting duet. And speaking of detecting, Aunt Vivian tries to commission Emerson to find dear old Dwight who is missing, and since Emerson knows he’s in Charles Charles�?grave, he brushes off the assignment, which causes her to hire The Norwegians - Magnus Alstadder, the leader, played by Orlando Jones, Mills Nilsson and Hedda Lillihammer, played by character actors whose faces you have surely seen before. Ned and Chuck, meanwhile, are stressed at the disappearance of Chuck’s father, and even moreso now that the potential fallout of the Norwegian’s investigation might pose for our dynamic trio. In the meanwhile, Chuck wants to let Olive in on Ned’s magical finger properties, but she’s not a good variable and it winds up biting them in the butt as she turns itty bitty traitor…or does she? No, she couldn’t, and she doesn’t, but her little investigating and help for the other team does lead them to an exhumation of both Chuck and Charles Charles�?graves…which turn out to be empty! What?? Chuck wants to believe it’s her father’s doing and who else could it be? Who else indeed�? As it happens, our Olive was trying to work deep undercover, and even though our other 3 detectives won’t let her in on the secrets, she has a devotion to them that is unshakeable. You can’t help but love her for it, and when Ned and she steal the Mother (Mobile Investigative Laboratory Facility- the Lab on wheels for the Norwegians) to destroy the evidence, she asks Ned questions of the yes or no variety so that she can get some answers without getting the whole truth �?she’s really just looking for honesty. As they reach a dead end, the van careening off, and Olive clinging to Ned �?now physically as well as emotionally, she regrets that he never felt for her the way he feels for Chuck. Ned replies �?I wouldn’t say never,�?and I daresay if my heart didn’t swell the way Olive’s did, as her face shone in sweet requited satisfaction �?even though it was fleeting. They are saved by a mysterious man, who just continues to solidify the case that it was Charles Charles, watching his girl and her friends in the peripheral sense, helping as he can. The Norwegians then find Dwight in his hotel room, dead by natural causes, and what it does is it proves Lilly right that he just abandoned her and was a bad man, and Vivian hates her for it…until they learn about the desecration of Chuck’s grave (and the implication that the body was burned by Dwight along with Charles Charles). In a tender moment, Emerson tells Vivian that the body wasn’t Chuck, her spirit lives on (I’ll say) and now Vivian, even as she is upset with Lilly, knows how her sister’s heart will break at learning about Chuck, breaks the news gently, as a sister would. It makes me take pause that Vivian knows how much this Chuck news would affect Lilly, and I wonder if our delicate aunt doesn’t know more –or as much as �?we do. And so some loose ends are tied and Ned’s secret is still thus…and he decides to start using fresh fruit instead of reviving the rotting fruit: �?EM>no more dead fruit no more dead people�?is his new motto and he’s just going to go cold turkey since this was too close a call…but the thing is, it wasn’t Chuck’s father helping to clean up Ned’s mess…it was. . . Ned’s father! Who, has a surprising perma-tan in the form of…George Hamilton! I have a hard time with stunt casting and celeb cameos, and while that can be deemed a loose description for Mr. Hamilton, it felt flat to me that Ned’s dad would look like that or be him. I don’t know that he’s quirky enough for the show as a whole, and I admit with the exception of seeing only his face and not much performance except for the reveal of who he is in the Pushing Daisies-verse I wonder if the fit will take or remain unfit. With less time to spend at the Pie Hole, I become more and more regrettably aware of the end and the disappointment of complete closure, and rumors of Bryan Fuller completing the arc in comic book form are small consolation. I can only hope the rest of the truncated season (and series) can deliver at its height. This episode was not it, and I hope it’s not my disappointment at the network that is coloring my opinion. Only 4 more to go, and it won’t be til after the holidays that we know how much we can learn and live in the world that is Pushing Daisies. |
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or, Are Geeks Becoming Social Fascists? By Lisa Fary Wired is running their Sexiest Geeks of 2008 poll, getting reactions from drooled-on keyboards to geek elitism. Drool, I expect. The elitism concerns me. The Sexiest Geeks of 2008 is a user generated list, not something developed by editors. True, several of the women on the list have acted in geeky movies and television shows and it’s not known if they’re actually into geeky stuff. But, there are a lot of women on the list who are into traditionally geeky stuff. Danica McKellar is an actress and mathematician who has written two math books aimed at middle school girls. There is also Jade Raymond, producer at Ubisoft Games. Philologist Marina Orlova from Hot for Words. Chess Grandmaster Alexandra Kosteniuk. Geek singer Marina Call. And so on and so on. Real geeks, real pretty. I’m not bothered by this. I’ve moved past the second-wave feminist ideas about physical beauty and the patriarchy that I flung around with abandon in my former life as a collegiate academic. I get that making an effort to look presentable really does help in life and I don’t resent it. The sexy sex-object part doesn’t bother me either because, let’s face it, I’m always looking for reasons to post hot pictures of guys on Pink Raygun. Come on, Pink Raygun once ran an analysis of Jack Sheppard’s chest hair and has made references to the TV Boyfriend Petting Zoo. Obviously, I dig sexy. What does bother me about the Sexiest Geeks of 2008 is the geek elitism appearing in the comments. Comments listing characteristics of true geekdom, many of which had me questioning my own geekdom. Here’s a sampler: - I’ll bet none of them know the difference between a Blackberry and an iPhone
- Must be able to write your own Desktop widgets or customize you system in some way.
- Simply liking games isn’t enough for a girl to be considered a geek anymore.
- For true geek cred you must have an intellectual pursuit, preferably obscure. of some kind. Such as ancient egyptian algebra or perl.
- Have you ever READ McKellar’s book? It’s targeted towards bimbo tweeners.
- A woman loses geek cred in my book when she poses in lingerie or a bathing suit.
- So these girls are “geeks�?because they once appeared in *some kind* of geek-related movie???? Or write in their little blog???!
And then, the comment thread wouldn’t be complete if some guy didn’t say all the girls were ugly: - Those pics made you drool? if bad posing & bad lighting turn you on, you need help. What does a Hanes Her Way, or Victoria’s Secret ad do for you? Sorry, I just don’t see them as drool-able.
Sooooo, according to these criteria, in order to be a geek, I must be able to do some level of programming beyond HTML, have a weird hobby I pursue with the singlemindedness of an Asperger’s sufferer, and be good at math so I won’t have to reference McKellar’s books. Because, apparently, if you suck at math, you’re a bimbo. I guess I’ll just go try out for the cheerleading squad, then. Oh wait. I can’t, because I like weird stuff, won’t wear contacts, and think that “Must like Star Wars or Star Trek, preferably both�?is an acceptable criterion to list for the perfect guy on a Match.com profile. Sorry, but I’ve always been a geek, not just self-identified, but identified by others and not in an endearing way. “Geek�?was what I was called in middle school and in high school because I liked getting good grades, I liked science labs, I liked reading. “Geek�?was what I was called because my clothes didn’t fit me properly, my skin was broken out, and my hair was too oily to feather properly.
A lot of modern geeks were similarly ostracized in middle and high school and our punishers were the Beautiful People. You know, the Beautiful People who had fabulous parties on the weekends while their parents were away. The Beautiful People who got by on their looks while shoving group work off on us. The Beautiful People who got attention for nothing more than their genetic luck. The Sexiest Geeks of 2008 cuts right down to our insecure high school geek selves. For the adult geek boy, it’s a lot like looking at the hot girls you could never get in high school, except now, they can talk to you about your stuff (and you’re still never gonna get them). For the adult geek girl, this list is a lot like looking on our high school tormentors again, but now they’ve appropriated our stuff and our dating pool. Of course, in American culture, “geek�?and “sexy�?are antithetical and we learn that at a very young age, usually at about middle school, when puberty rides in and being smart starts being really sucky. Psychotherpist David Anderegg says it’s because tweens and teens are, socially, fascist pigs, imposing their preconceived sense of normality on themselves and everyone around them. Sexy is normal; smart and geeky are not. Anderegg postulates that this social fascism is one of the reasons why math scores in the United States plummet in the middle school years and never recover, and why you have to go to India to get an engineer. Hence the need for Danica McKellar’s math books. Girls in particular are most likely to stop trying in math class in middle school because it’s not socially acceptable at that age to be good at math. Geek = Death in middle school. The world is hostile enough to geeks. Do we have to be hostile to each other within our own ranks? Shouldn’t we, as enlightened, adult geeks, be more open minded than your average middle school tween? Besides, all those commenters are wrong about true geekdom. To be a true geek in the original sense of the world, you have to bite the heads off of live chickens at a carnival. I’m just saying. |
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Here is thre annual List Pink Raygun does each year. Of course I can not argue about the TOP 10 except for Lois Lane but I am happy with who is on the list, if not most of their placing... tick For all our discussion about the lack of strong women in genre film and TV, we certainly had a hard time narrowing it down to 100 this year’s list of the most powerful fictional femmes. The Pink Raygun list of the most powerful fictional femmes is inducting several newcomers this year as well making several changes from last year’s rankings. Most notably, last year’s number one, Death, dropping off the list entirely. Her movie, which had been announced at the time of last year’s list, has been stuck in development hell and appears to be going nowhere. Battlestar Galactica’s Cally Tyrol has also dropped off the list due to an incurable (and inexplicably sudden) case of the crazies. BSG’s Starbuck is still on the list, but has dropped in rank considerably, as has Heroes�?Angela Petrelli. When compiling the list, Pink Raygun’s writers considered several factors. Who has been the most influential, both in their universe and our own? Who has the greatest real-world resonance? Who has the greatest power, physical, mental, super, or otherwise? And now, the staff of Pink Raygun give you the 2008 edition of the 100 Most Powerful Fictional Femmes of Genre Film and Television: | | 100. Penny (Dr. Horrible’s Sing-A-Long Blog) - Penny doesn’t break stereotypes or do much of anything besides get snowed by Captain Hammer (corporate tool) and die, but she was an inspiration to Dr. Horrible. Her power lay in her death, caused by Dr. Horrble’s very own death ray, guaranteeing that he’ll be way more evil than he otherwise would have been. |  | | 99. Princess Buttercup (The Princess Bride) - You can look at Buttercup two different ways. In one view she is a spoiled girl who forces her true love to go out and get possibly killed by the Dread Pirate Roberts just to prove how much he is willing to do for her and realizes a bit too late just how important he was to her. In the other she is a spoiled princess who is devastated when her true love is possible killed by the Dread Pirate Roberts and agrees to marry a controlling, murderous freak because she doesn’t care about anything anymore. However you choose to see her, she is a fascinating character, and a cultural icon ever since the first time she pushed her Wesley around and he whispered “As you wish�?to her. |  | | 98. Daisy Steiner (Spaced) - Providing a voice for the numerous girl geeks out there that didn’t have someone to represent them on screen, Daisy Steiner’s geekiness is accessible and real and proves that yeah, girls geek out just as hard as boys. |  | | 97. Seven of Nine (Star Trek: Voyager) - Her Borgish background has given Seven of Nine heightened vision and the ability to sense when other Borg are nearby. She is physically strong and very intelligent, but has limited social skills and is in many ways a child. |  | | 96. Mrs. Journeyman (Journeyman) - Yes, her actual name is Katie Vasser, but “Mrs. Journeyman�?is so much more accurate because she was a true partner in dealing with their little time-travel problem (she didn’t consider it his problem, it was theirs to handle together). After the initial - and understandable - freak out upon finding that her husband is not only time traveling, but doing so with his hot, previously dead fiance, Katie is remarkably supportive, sane, and pragmatic. |  | | 95. Molly Weasley (Harry Potter) - Thus far in the movies, Mrs. Weasley has been a good, old-fashioned, doting mum, but her moment of bad-ass against Bellatrix Lestrange is coming. |  | | 94. Marion Ravenwood (Indiana Jones) - Sure, she was the only woman on the planet to snare Indy in marriage, Marion was also the only person on the planet who could save Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull by injecting some life into what seemed to be a zombie Indy. And she raised a hell of a kid on her own. |  | | 93. Judy Dench as M (007) - She’s so cold and mean that she’s been called “The Evil Queen of Numbers�? As head of the British Secret Service, she can have James Bond killed with a phone call. This M is also open about missing the Cold War when spy movie plots didn’t take an hour to set up because of the labyrinthine world of international terrorism. “Flamboyant Commie with a giant nuke�?was much simpler. |  | | 92. Sun Hwa-Kwon (Lost) - We only saw a little bit of what she was capable of after coming back from Craphole Island, but that little bit was significant. Sun took over her controlling father’s company and brought him to his knees. In the wake of Jin’s death, she is more driven than ever. |  | | 91. Mary Jane Watson (Spider-Man) - Model. Actress. (But please god don’t let her try to sing “Fever�?again.) She often plays the role of damsel in distress, but she’s a bit of normalcy in Peter Parker’s otherwise hectic life. |  | |
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| 90. Pepper Potts (Iron Man) - Sassy, smart and yet still human without being the stereotypical whiny and complainy superhero girlfriend. |  | | 89. Padme Amidala (Star Wars) - OK, so she was in a couple of fights, was a queen and a senator and blah, blah, blah. She could have been one of the truly awesome if it weren’t for dying from a frigging broken heart and entering into a secret - possibly illegal - marriage born from blurting out “I love you!�?just before her public execution. Romantics may say that love conquers all, but it doesn’t conquer this list. |  | | 88. Angela Petrelli (Heroes) - While she was under the control of her husband for a time, Mama Petrelli remains a master manipulator with seemingly encyclopedic knowledge of those around her and a keen sense for distributing information. She successfully unleashed her skills on Sylar this season and even after the jig was up and she admitted that she’d used him, Mama P confidently kept stringing Sylar along with carefully placed information dispersal. For all her faults, Mama P shows the most self-control, the most rational behavior of all the women on Heroes. She should teach a course. |  | | 87. Auntie Entity (Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome) - Being the leader of Bartertown must be a lot like being the mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Instead of being the meth capital of the state, Bartertown is the pig poop capital of post-apocalyptic Australia. And working with Master Blaster must have been a lot like campaigning with John McCain. However, unlike another small town leader who tried to make it big, Auntie Entity is genuinely charismatic and ruthless in her pursuit of power. |  | | 86. Eowyn (Lord of the Rings) - A sheildmaiden of Rohan, she disguised herself as a man in the Battle of the Pelennor Fields where she slew the Witch-king of Angmar. But, she did have that clingy obsession with Aragorn, not that we can blame her. |  | | 85. Barbarella - Her sexuality is still edgy in a prudish American culture; however, she’s not terribly pro-active. Barbarella blunders around the galaxy with the naive belief that people will help her, and they do, but she does very little on her own. That said, Barbarella has some of the most awesome costumes in sci-fi (and possibly the best hair). |  | | 84. Brigitte (Ginger Snaps I and II) - High school sucks. A lot. So it’s good to have a partner. But when a werewolf bites Brigitte’s sister Ginger, ruining their suicide pact, what’s a girl to do? She takes it upon herself to find a cure, delaying and postponing the eventual. Brigitte doesn’t have a really great plan, but her unshakeable devotion to her sister makes her stupidly brave, and that is tremendous. |  | | 83. Chani (Dune) - Not just anyone can handle being the lover of the Universe’s Super Being, but this Freman lass handles the duties well. Sure she can’t ever marry her Emperor Messiah in name because of all that political garbage, but she doesn’t let that stop her from fighting weakling challengers, bearing royal twins, or slapping down over-reaching Imperial Princesses. |  | | 82. Dr. Zira (Planet of the Apes) - Psychologist, veterinarian, human specialist, and loud liberal, Dr. Zira saw the intelligence of astronaut George Taylor and helped him escape the planet of the apes. |  | | 81. Dr. Helena Russell (Space: 1999) - If the last guy in charge of Moonbase Alpha had taken care of the nuclear waste dump leakage that Dr. Russell had warned about, the moonbase wouldn’t have had the accident and wouldn’t have been thrown out of Earth’s orbit. Once, while drifting in unknown space, Dr. Russell used her medical expertise and scientific smarts to treat the crew and handle whatever was coming up from behind the next planet. |  | |
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| 80. Olive Snook (Pushing Daisies) - Itty-bitty is a go-getter and a do-gooder and in the face of unrequited love, she presses on with a song. Sure, Chuck has the whole “I can’t touch my boyfriend�?thing, but Olive has the “I’m in love with the boyfriend you can’t touch�?thing and rises above it to befriend Chuck and help her keep her secret (or a version thereof) from the Darling Mermaid Darlings. Olive does it without bitterness, without cattiness, and without some sinister plan to drive Chuck away. OK, Olive is a bit bitter and a bit catty, but it doesn’t get the best of her. |  | | 79. Chloe Sullivan (Smallville) - It’s tragic that she doesn’t receive half the respect that she deserves. It’s a testament to her sense of humor, devotion to justice, and dogged curiosity that fans of the show assumed she was a nascent Lois Lane. A greater compliment could not exist, as Lois Lane is another top, top, top fictional femme in the same fictional universe. Over time, she’s morphed into the only responsible adult in a two-state radius, and she’s proven that she can navigate the dictates of her conscience even in a world where she must battle both Earth-bound and intergalactic threats. |  | | 78. Veronica Mars (Veronica Mars) - There’s a mystery. She solves it. Simple? Rarely. The devious deeds of 09ers are as tangled as their financial records; falsified documents, hidden identities, and a ridiculous power differential are just some of the obstacles working against the blonde avenger. While life-or-death situations are a daily casualty of the job, Veronica always nabs the guilty party, peppering her triumph with snark. |  | | 77. The Bride (Kill Bill v 1 and 2) - Talk about an iconic Fictional Femme character. We have all fought with her, laughed with her (or around her, she didn’t laugh much), and sought vengeance with her. We were with her in Japan and Texas and even the suburbs, in a hospital bed and a rinky dink church and atop a mountain being treated like a slave. She is the ultimate warrior of the modern age, smart, vicious, sexy, and probably a darn good mother to boot. |  | | 76. Coraline (Moonlight) - This 400-year old vampire is fabulous, if a bit deceitful and kidnappy. But, we are talking about snagging the extremely sexy Mick St. John for eternity - we can’t really blame Coraline for turning him vamp without his knowledge and going to extreme lengths to keep him in her life. Have you seen him half-naked? |  | | 75. Dr. Evelyn Carnahan-O’Connell (The Mummy and sequels) - A more bookish version of Lara Croft, Evelyn started out as a klutzy librarian but became a capable adventurer, easily the equal of her husband. A triumph for smart, awkward girls everywhere. |  | | 74. E.V.E. (Wall- E) - She shoots, she scores. Eve has the sort of appreciation for beauty that humans NOW don’t, let alone in her time, but she doesn’t entirely allow herself to be distracted by it. Her joy in living is matched only by her conscious dedication to duty. Instead of running on auto-pilot, she makes the deliberate decision to prioritize human growth over human comfort and friendship over all else |  | | 73. Juliet Parrish (V) - In a world overtaken by evil, killer, reptile people, it fell on a little blonde scientist to step up and take control of the fledgling resistance movement. She had no idea how to run a military operation or keep her troop of willing (but oftentimes stupid and reckless) soldiers alive, but still managed to not only keep them alive but eventually lead them to victory. Even after being taken prisoner by an evil reptile scientist who tried to brainwash her. |  | | 72. Olivia Dunham (Fringe) - Flesh-dissolving chemicals, rapidly aging serial killers, microwave emitting brains, hallucinations of a dead lover and other fun, X-File-y stuff is continually thrown at FBI Agent Dunham, who manages to embody both Mulder and Scully in her pursuit of the truth. |  | | 71. Grendel’s Mother (Beowulf) - A descendant of Cain, she’s a much stronger and destructive adversary than her son. The CG movie from Robert Zemeckis also added “sexy temptress�?to her bag of tricks and made her all the more triumphant over the weaknesses of men. |  | |
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| 70. Starbuck (BSG) - Oh, how far she’s fallen (down almost thirty points from last year). This formerly strong and brave Viper pilot has been overcome with mental imbalance trying to play off as depth. However, she did know the way to Earth and may still lead all of Cylon-kind to destruction. |  | | 69. Chihiro Ogino/Sen (Spirited Away) - Chihiro begins as a whiny and self-centered girl but at the end of her journey, matures and takes away the value of hard work and caring for others. |  | | 68. Cylon Hybrid (Battlestar Galactica): She permanently lives in a hot tub: of course, we’re jealous. In her spare time, the space-oracle with a fortune for everyone keeps the oxygen flowing and rambles stream-of-consciousness poetry stylings that would make Joyce dizzy. Sexier than your GPS, she’ll take you where you want to go, and might kidnap Laura Roslin in the process. Jump! |  | | 67. Diana (V) - Second in command of the Visitor fleet, Diana is possibly the most sinister of the human-craving, water-stealing alien species. She rivals Mama Peterelli for manipulation abilities, and has a vast arsenal with which to back them up. |  | | 66. Nauiscca (Nausicaa of the Valley of the Winds) - Directory Hayao Miyazaki loves his female characters to be strong, independent, and adorable. One of this greatest examples of these kinds of characters is Nausicaa. She flies, she shoots, she empathizes with giant, mutant bugs, and she manages to save the world by making the ultimate sacrifice. She’s tough and she’s cute, plus she has an adorable furry sidekick. |  | | 65. Tory Foster (Battlestar Galactica): Stealing elections, stealing babies, all dangerous work, so the less you notice her the better. Most don’t truly know Tory Foster until they’re halfway out an airlock (sayonara Cally!). She’s the only Cylon who realizes JUST HOW AWESOME IT IS TO BE A ROBOT. In fact, she’s the only Cylon who truly aspires to be nothing greater than herself. Which is fine, because, remember: Tory Foster is perfect |  | | 64. Sofie (Carnivale) - She’s either the Anti-Christ or pregnant with the Anti-Christ by the end of the final episode of Carnivale. Either way, by the end of the second season, she was sporting pupil-less black eyes and bringing Brother Justin back to life in the corn fields. Too bad we never had closure with Sofie. |  | | 63. Dr. Elizabeth Weir (Stargate: Atlantis) Briefly the leader of Stargate Command, this expert diplomatic mediator is now in charge of the Atlantis expedition to the Pegasus galaxy. |  | | 62. Samantha Carter (Stargate SG1) - The woman, whose brain is a national treasure, just doesn’t stop. Carter has a Ph.D. in astrophysics, knows her way around a coding environment, biological threats and quantum physics, and is a decorated fighter pilot to boot. |  | | 61. Vala Mal Doran (Stargate: SG-1) - This arms-dealer was single-handedly responsible for preventing an invasion of the Milky Way galaxy by destroying a Supergate with a cargo ship. |  | |
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| 60. Livia Beale (Journeyman) - While Dan Vasser traveled to the past, Livia traveled to the future from the 1940s. When she got stuck in that future, she took advantage of opportunities she didn’t have in her own time: she went to law school and made a life for herself on her own and on her own terms. When she met up with Dan again several years after her supposed death, she didn’t want him back, didn’t instigate a love triangle (which could have been easy to do considering the amount of Dan’s sexy). |  | | 59. Elizabeth Bathory (Countess Dracula, Bathory, The Countess, and dozens more): like Vlad the Impaler, the Countess who seduced virgins and then bathed in their blood has roots in reality, and yet, she’s spawned dozens of cinema vampires that emulate her example in a quest for youth and beauty. Vanity? Maybe, or it could be the unquenchable lust of a sexual sadist so reviled that her desire prevents us from seeing her as human. The female vamp wouldn’t be the same without her. |  | | 58. Aeryn Sun (Farscape) - She lost her entire world and built a new one. She over-wrote her prejudices to find happiness among people she long disdained and had been trained from her birth to hate. It’s the kind of conversion that is especially enviable after years of divisive politics have driven most people to self-select refuge among the like-minded. Aeryn grew, trained herself into a curiosity about the world that her upbringing denied her and learned to use her most effective weapon–her brain–to its utmost. |  | | 57. Emma Peel (The Avengers) - Genius, martial arts expert, and fabulous dresser, The Avengers�?Mrs. Peel is the mama of modern lady spies such as Sydney Bristow of Alias and Chuck’s Agent Sarah Walker. |  | | 56. Liz Sherman (Hellboy) - Liz was kind of wasted in the first Hellboy movie, but was given more to do in this summer’s sequel, The Golden Army. A powerful pyrokinetic, Liz accidentally destroyed a city block and killed her family at age eleven. Since then, she’s gained control of her power and gained a demonic boyfriend (but “demonic�?in a good way, not like that guy you went out with last week). |  | | 55. Sue Storm (Fantastic Four) - Really? All that education to second fiddle to Mr. Fantastic? All that trauma to get cheap laughs over public nudity? Sue may be the most powerful of the Fantastic Four crew: The Human Torch can flame on, but Sue can contain the flames. The Thing is strong, but Sue could stop him dead in his tracks with an invisible force-shield. Mr. Fantastic can stretch, but Sue can contain him, too, and make him take out the trash if he wants some lovin�?later that night. We’re horrified at the way she’s been portrayed in the recent movies and demand justice for Sue Storm. |  | | 54. Jamie Summers (Bionic Woman) - Tennis pro, schoolteacher, bartender, big sister, Bionic Woman. Rebuilt after a near fatal accident (skydiving in the 1970s, a car accident in 2007), Summers now has bionic implants that allow her to perform superhuman feats. However, like many lady heroes, Summers has been grossly misused. In the 1970s, her bionic skills went up against Fembots and truth serum shampoo. In 2007, they went up against. . . well, we’ve tried to block that from our memory. |  | | 53. Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) - Bucking her noble birth, Croft searches for fantastic artifacts such as Excalibur, The Spear of Destiny and Pandora’s Box. She also searches for box office success and seems confused that audiences don’t pack in at the mere mention of Angelina Jolie. |  | | 52. Elizabeth Swan (Pirates of the Caribbean and sequels) - Never a damsel in distress, Elizabeth Swan fights pirates, takes on the likes of Davy Jones, and has the fortitude to sacrifice Jack Sparrow when she realizes that’s what it will take to appease the Kraken. Her toughness, swordsmanship, and deceptive ruthlessness land her the title of Pirate King by the end of the third movie. |  | | 51. Sydney Bristow (Alias) - This super spy is fluent in 24 languages and multiple forms of armed and unarmed combat. But, even Sydney couldn’t stand off against American Idol and a Thursday night time slot. |  | |
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| 50. Max Guevara (Dark Angel) - Post-Pulse Seattle. A genetically engineered supersoldier works as a bike messenger and hides out from Manticore, the company that made her. Max gets herself involved in some pretty high-profile hijinks for a girl on the lamb. |  | | 49. Sharon Valerii (BSG) - Out of all of the women on BSG, Sharon, model Eight, is the most complex. Of course she has several versions of herself to live out all her possible life paths through, which not just anyone can count on. But to have the Athena version turn against the other Cylons and help their enemy, while the Boomer version continues to fight on the side of the toasters is a very interesting twist on the idea of “inner demons.�?/SPAN> |  | | 48. Maleficent (Disney’s Sleeping Beauty): Did anyone scare you as a child like Maleficent? She isn’t simply powerful and capricious; it’s not that she can turn into a dragon (we all can agree: one of her more admirable qualities); Maleficent is evil because she wants to be. It’s a choice, and she grabs it by both hands without remorse. |  | | 47. Dana Scully (X-Files) - Placed on the X-Files in an effort to debunk Mulder’s life’s work, instead she played by her own rules: the laws of science. Collecting fanboys (Lone Gunmen, Mulder, Skinner, Doggett, et. al.) and fangirls (Leila Harrison, Monica Reyes) like marbles, it’s hard not to notice how easily she pwns. Aliens, cancer, serial killers, the medical industry, there’s nothing she can’t conquer. Did we mention she’s immortal? |  | | 46. Rose Tyler (Doctor Who) - She was magnificent. Blazing through time and space with the Doctor, absorbing the time vortex itself, traveling within and between universes, Rose Tyler saved the world-as-we-know-it countless times. The choice to leave the TARDIS crossed her path on a few occasions, but working with the Doctor wasn’t an once-in-a-lifetime adventure for Rose, it was her life’s work as well. |  | | 45. Susan Ivanova (Babylon 5) - Susan Ivanova overcame stilted dialogue and an embarrassing first season to become second in command of Babylon 5, latent telepath and eventually, a general and leader of the Rangers. |  | | 44. Powerpuff Girls - The fact that sugar, spice, and everything nice leads to–surprise!–supergirls who are still as fractious and self-aware as average girls is the trio’s most endearing trait. Normal little girls still want to have fun and play and be innocent, but they also long to be taken seriously and treated with respect. The Powerpuffs have fun by saving the city of Townsville on a regular basis, but they earn the respect of the citizens by prioritizing them above all. |  | | 43. Sookie Stackhouse (True Blood) - This telepathic waitress holds her own against vampires, werewolves, and the like in the small town of Bon Temps, Louisiana both in her print novels and her HBO series. HBO has ordered two more seasons of her show, guaranteeing that Sookie Stackhouse will be on our TVs for quite a while. |  | | 42. Storm (X-Men) - Storm should really have her own movie where she isn’t plagued by bad dialogue and bad acting and where she can showcase her powers in a big way, an impressive way. Making it foggy in San Francisco? Not that impressive. She’s far too powerful to suffer the indignities of the movies. Or the indignities of Halle Berry. |  | | 41. Nancy Thompson (Nightmare on Elm Street) - Nancy gets major props–more so than Laurie Strode–for defeating an indefatiguable villain because she not only did it repeatedly, but she did it in her dreams, in her real world, and in the really, real world as the actress who played her, Heather Langenkamp. Most people would be a real mess if the fictional bully they’d made a career out of humiliating came to life in the real world and started stalking them and killing their loved ones. Heather/Nancy just stomped all over Freddy Krueger and clapped him in the irons of story-telling in a meta-circle he would never escape. (Turns out he did, but you’ll notice he never bothered Heather/Nancy ever again. Let’s see Jamie Lee/Laurie beat that.) |  | |
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| 40. Catwoman - Sexy, strong, and fabulous, Catwoman has been a worthy villainess to Batman in comics, television, and film. |  | | 39. Turanga Leela (Futurama) - Leela is just almost too perfect for this sort of thing. She’s not only the leader of her crew, but she’s their smartest member, the hardest worker, the bravest fighter, and, frequently, the most compassionate. She may occasionally lose her head over cute animals, but she is still savvy enough to navigate the tricky complications of her subordinate’s affection for her with such grace that neither lose face. She’s also achingly human without being cloyingly angsty, which an almost impossible line to skate. |  | | 38. Martha Jones (Doctor Who) - One of the few companions whose love for the Doctor didn’t encompass her whole life. Traveled with the Dcotor, loved the Doctor, left the Doctor by her own choice (important since in the new series both Rose and Donna were “robbed�?of their Doctor time), worked for UNIT, did a stint on Torchwood and saved the world a few times. Awesome and waaaay underrated as a companion. |  | | 37. Hermione Granger (Harry Potter) - There is nary a geek girl who does not deep down identify with Hermione Granger’s know-it-all charm and wit, secretly hoping her own childhood memories of awkward are merely evidence of young brilliance failing to find proper appreciation. The wishful similarities end there, however, as Hermione’s mental dexterity is matched by her acumen with a wand. Warding off Dementors or defending herself from Death Eaters, Hermione Granger is a magical force to be reckoned with. |  | | 36. Col. Wilma Deering (Buck Rogers) - It’s never been clear why she was demoted from colonel in charge of Earth’s space defense to co-pilot of the Searcher, but Deering performed those duties well and in what is possibly the most unforgiving uniform in military history. |  | | 35. Aeon Flux - A Monican spy, Aeon Flux seeks to disrupt and subvert the nearby technocratic nation of Bregna. Her dazzling acrobatics, powers of seduction as reasoning, and comfort with a weapon do not guarantee she will complete her mission. In fact, the only certainty is whether she succeeds or fails, each episode will culminate in her death. It’s futile and hauntingly poignant, as the next chapter she is inexplicably alive, continuing her pursuit of anarchy with the same single-minded tenacity. |  | 34. Dr. Girlfriend (Venture Bros.) -What’s not to love about Dr. Girlfriend? (Or Dr. Mrs. The Monarch). Hardly a feminine hanger-on to her villainous man, Dr. Girlfriend is usually the one to stay reasonable (as far as villainy goes) and is now a full, official partner in their evil duo-ship.
|  | 33. Ruby (Supernatural) -Formerly a human, this demon has been very helpful to Sam and Dean Winchester lately, helping them escape an angelic showdown, helping Sam hunt while Dean was in Hell, and getting it on with Sam. Her motives aren’t clear, but she’s obviously not an ordinary demon.
|  | | 32. Selene (Underworld, Underworld: Evolution) - Not just anyone can look so good in latex and pleather, handle a tricked out piece that shoots silver bullets (or their uber-cool future form), and handle a boyfriend who is a real animal, but Selene manages and then some. And there is more to her than just the slick warrior that she parades around for the world to see. When she finds out that her entire vampire life has been a lie and that her undead “father�?is really the one that murdered her human family, you can see her start to fall apart on the inside. Then she manages to pull herself back together for the big, bloody, showdown save�?twice. |  | | 31. Alice (Resident Evil) - Superhuman strength, telekinesis, the ability to fight in increasingly ridiculous outfits. Despite zombie attacks and corporate evil, there seems to be no stopping Alice. |  | |
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| 30. Morgan Le Fay (Exaclibur, Mist of Avalon, the Arthurian myths) - She is one of the first strong female characters in recorded fiction (unless myths are real, in which case recorded history). Sure she does it with her brother and has his murderous son all to bring down the paradise that is Avalon (well okay, there was other stuff that helped brought it down), but deep down Morgan has some good qualities. She is strong and willing to fight against what she sees as injustice to women…and herself. |  | | 29. Toshiko Sato (Torchwood) - Possibly the most underestimated -and most emotionally beat up -member of the Torchwood crew, Tosh’s backstory showed that her involvement with the team was an alternative to a life prison term with UNIT. Timid and quiet, she is a technical genius and prone to falling in love with unattainable partners. However, her true strength wasn’t revealed until her death. Dying of a gunshot wound, she was still able to talk Owen through preventing a nuclear meltdown and saving Cardiff, and she did it without torturing him with the news that she was about to die. |  | | 28. Agent Sarah Walker (Chuck) - A modern-day Mrs. Peel with a dark history, Sarah Walker is one of the CIA’s top agents, assigned to protect Chuck. She handily kicks the ass of just about any adversary who approaches, consistently fighting her way out of the most dismal of situations. Although she is sympathetic to Chuck’s situation, is protective, and has developed feelings toward him, Sarah doesn’t get bogged down in emotions and sentimentality, the traditional weaknesses of a lady action hero. |  | | 27. Wendy Watson (The Middleman) - Maybe she’s great because she does that fast-talking thing that we all love in our TV these days. And maybe she’s great because she plays off the Middleman’s stoicism so well. But there is certainly something fascinating about “DubDub.�?She is a sassy action hero in a world that can certainly use more of them. Wendy is also handy with a Harrier jet, a quick study with the demanding Sensei Ping, and digs zombies. |  | | 26. Barbara Gordon (Batman, Birds of Prey) Though she unfortunately was the victim of a sexual assault (which occurred at the same time as her paralysis), Barbara never became bogged down in the role of the victim. She soared as Oracle, remained tough and motivated despite being confined to a wheel chair. She hasn’t crossed over into movies and her one TV outing was the lamentably awful “Birds of Prey,�?but she’s fairly infamous as both Batgirl and Oracle that I think she makes for an awesome inclusion |  | | 25. Trinity (The Matrix) - Although the sequels (which we prefer to pretend did not exist) diminished her importance, Trinity remains the apotheosis of an elite, intelligent, creative warrior. Part of her appeal is the fact that she has none of the ego of her cohorts, nothing to prove but that she lives up to her own standard of excellence. |  | | 24. Cameron (Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles) - Sure she is a reprogrammed killer robot from the future, but in a show that is increasingly lazy in its storylines, Cameron remains an interesting and complicated figure. The glimpse into her backstory was more eye-opening than expected when it turned out she was built off of a real person, and still harbors some of that human girl’s memories and thoughts. Will she eventually turn on John Connor and kill him because of her initial programming, or will she prove that a cyborg can behave as a human? It is fun to watch her and try to figure it out. |  | | 23. Major Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) - She’s a cyborg who questions her immortal soul. She also has awesome thermal camouflage built into her skin that allows her to turn invisible, can talk along brain circuits to anyone, and doesn’t mind ripping her own arms off if it will stop a tank from blowing up. Kusanagi is the definition of hardcore and sexy, all wrapped up in a delightful anime package. |  | | 22. Three (BSG) - Anyone who can walk on set and steal the show out from under Six inside of two episodes is clearly a force to be reckoned with. Three’s impact is felt in how she is able to shunt into her fits of insane faith and self-possession without losing her uncanny ability to read and play people off of one another. (Which is more than many a crazy female character on that show can claim.) She doesn’t go off the rails when absorbed by her faith, though she challenges the definition of sanity by doing all that she can to maintain and strengthen her belief in god and the plan. Not to mention that Three is the only living being who knows the identity of the final Cylon, and thus, has all of humanity and most of the Cylons by the short and curlies. |  | | 21. River Tam (Firefly, Serenity) - This wiry girl not only took out Jayne, she took out a bunch of hungry, angry Reavers singlehandedly, saving (most) of Serenity’s crew. The only thing holding her back is her unbalanced mental state. |  | |
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| 20. Gwen Cooper (Torchwood) - Compassionate, yet tough, and a great second in command to Jack Harkness. Gwen not only ran Torchwood while Jack was off chasing the Doctor, but she manages to make her job work with now-husband Rhys. To top it off, she showed up to her wedding day fully pregnant with an alien baby and managed to not only save England (and possibly the world), but pull off a pretty romantic ceremony. |  | | 19. Supergirl - Kara Zor-El, Superman’s cousin. She has all of his yellow-sun based abilities, but just can’t get a decent representation on screen. |  | | 18. Willow Rosenberg (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) - Never underestimate the shy, nerdy girl. She just may end up with the power to destroy the world. Willow’s story arc is similar to that of Jean Grey (Phoenix to Dark Phoenix) over at the X-Mansion, but unlike the Dark Phoenix story-line, Willow manages to overcome the dark magic inside her with the help of her friends. |  | | 17. Rogue (X-Men) - Not nearly as powerful in the movies as she is in the comic books, but still a force to be reckoned with. Or was, until she got the mutant cure shot at the end of X3. |  | | 16. Zoe Washburne (Firefly, Serenity) - She rises above all the female characters on Firefly because she is superlative without being subject to conditions to make her less threatening (like being cutesy, or a literal whore, or crazy). She isn’t a shut-down warrior like her captain, nor is she a hapless female laid-low by her all-too-present emotions at inconvenient times. Zoe isn’t tipped on balance from business-to-casual, she is able to be both, all things that she is, at any given time. If for nothing other than the fact that she is capable of grief larger than the wailings of thousands without shedding a single tear, she would be a worthy inclusion on this list. |  | | 15. Leeloo (The Fifth Element) - As the perfect woman and a super being, Leeloo already has alot going for her. But she is also pretty dang cute when she eats chicken, flashes her Multipass, and asks Corbin Dallas if he loves her. I’m all for mushy love scenes because I’m the kind of girl who enjoys them for some reason, but Leeloo’s mushy love scene is the ultimate in mushy love scenes. |  | | 14. Gabrielle (Xena: Warrior Princess) - Sure the show had someone else’s name on it, but truly the person who grew and changed and evolved the most was the sidekick. She started out perky and young and innocent, and morphed into a bard, an Amazon, an angel, a demon, a warrior queen, and eventually a samurai. |  | | 13. Captain Janeway (Star Trek: Voyager) - It took how long for Star Trek to get a lady captain? And then she didn’t even get the Enterprise? And then she got cast away to the Delta Quadrant? If we didn’t know better, we’d think this was some sort of conspiracy. But, like any tough woman, Janeway stretched her resources and genuinely did more with less. She handled first contact situations without the back up of the Federation and even successfully took on a Borg Queen in her efforts to bring Voyager back home. Braver than Kirk, more diplomatic than Picard, maybe Janeway was too good for the Enterprise in the first place. |  | | 12. Sarah Jane Smith (Doctor Who, Sarah Jane Adventures) - Sarah Jane does not make your coffee, but as the good Doctor soon learned, she will do your recon. It’s easy to forget, what with her frequent victimization, kidnapping, and general screaming and running about, that Sarah Jane was still a no-nonsense center around which the madness of the Doctor revolved. Sarah Jane is the sort who, in a pinch, is perfectly at ease with a rifle and a long shot if it means saving the world and the past. And she’d thank you not to interfere as she does so. Now charting her own adventures with her beloved K-9 and a gang of youths to call her own, Sarah Jane continues to explore and protect the interwoven worlds around her with an insatiable curiosity and drive for justice. |  | | 11. Jean Grey (X-Men) - In her better incarnations, she is surpassingly powerful and the force for creation and protection in the entire universe. But when she was bad, she was horrid, a threat uncontainable by the forces of all sentient species combined. Only Jean’s humanity ever caused her to retreat from the impulse to expunge all life on a whim, thus proving that despite all evidence to the contrary, human beings are intrinsically good. She’s risen and fallen and lost her way enough times to make a mess of her history (and been ridiculously abused in film adaptations), but her story will always be that of sacrifice to the greater good. |  | |
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 10.Mary Poppins (Mary Poppins) - Practically perfect in every way. She handles monotonous responsibilities tidily with a snap of her fingers leaving room for more exciting items on the agenda, such as: dancing while singing, redecorating with the contents of a magic carpet bag, traveling in chalk paintings, and feeding birds.
 9. Laura Roslin (BSG) - Laura Frakking Roslin. President, Mistress of the Airlock, Schoolteacher, Dying Leader, seemingly everything to everyone, and yet, always charting her own course. She has little interest in making nice with the Quorum, or anyone else who stands in her way, but ensuring the survival of humanity demands sacrifices no one else has the audacity to make.
 8. Princess Leia (Star Wars) - Assertive, brave, and tenacious, Leia is one of few examples of a rebel leader who rose to legitimate power and who did NOT abuse it. If only we had that sort of guarantee of leaders in this galaxy.
 7. Lois Lane (Superman) - The original Plucky Girl Reporter, Lois Lane was a working girl in the vein of Mary Tyler Moore before she ever dreamed of tossing her hat cheerfully into the Minneapolis sky. Initially a manipulative reporter determined to prove that Clark Kent and Superman were the same person, Lane progressed over the years, often mirroring the changing attitudes toward professional women and becoming a tougher-than-nails, Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist.
 6. Uhura (Star Trek) - We didn’t get a female second in command on the Enterprise, as Gene Roddenberry had originally intended with the original series, but Uhura was perhaps even more groundbreaking. Starting out as chief communications officer and eventually working her way up to commander, Uhura broke gender, racial, and social boundaries along the way. Also speaking to her strength, she was the only female in the known galaxy to seemingly be unaffected by Captain Kirk’s sexy, only succumbing to advances when forced at the hands of the Platonians. Unfortunately, Uhura was limited by the expectations of the time, and although she was successful, she never had her own command and never left the Enterprise. However, she opened hailing frequencies for all of us.
 5. Xena (Xena: Warrior Princess, Hercules: The Legendary Journeys) - Xena is epic, fantastically over the top, so this entry must be peppered with appropriate descriptive language such as “bloodthirsty�? “blazed�? “sacrifice�?and “redemption�? On the surface, Xena seems to be a direct descendant, possibly a more realistic interpretation, of the original Amazon warrior princess, Wonder Woman. While Xena may owe her existence to WW, she has a power and influence all her own. Xena’s origin is that of a guest star, a bloodthirsty warlord, and an opponent worthy of Hercules, but she blazed her own path as defender of the weak in her desire for redemption. That path took her from Greece to India and even to Hell. Xena eventually traveled to Japan, where she sacrificed herself in battle to set free some 40,000 souls.
 4. Sarah Connor (Terminator/Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles) - Not so great TV series aside, Sarah Connor is the original “mother of the future.�? Not just anyone could remain sane (or at least mostly sane) after finding out their child is the leader of a future resistance against killer robots, or that they will have to continually fight to keep that future leader alive against killer robots that keep popping through time to knock him off.
 3. Buffy (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) - Is there an evil Buffy hasn’t defeated? Is there a hardship she didn’t endure? Buffy holds the power of a slayer, endowing her with strength, stamina, agility and such, which get her through battle after battle. But, falling in love, losing a parent, working a crappy job at a fast food joint, stopping a best friend from destroying herself, these are challenges that can’t be be handled with her supernatural ability. What makes Buffy such a strong character is that she isn’t just a slayer - her slayer lifestyle has consequences for her and everyone around her, adding that much more adversity to overcome when she does save the world. Again.
 2. Wonder Woman - First among warrior women, without her, there is no Xena, no Buffy, no Sarah Connor. As an idea, she is incredibly strong, but as a character she has had some problems. Wonder Woman has been relaunched several times in her publication history and with varying origin stories. She’s been poorly interpreted by the likes of Jodi Piccoult and no one can seem to figure out how to make a movie about her. However, Wonder Woman remains an icon of feminine power, which was the purpose behind her creation. Creator William Moulton Martson said, “Wonder Woman is psychological propaganda for the new type of woman who should, I believe, rule the world.�?In spite of her problems, Wonder Woman continues to be the face of the warrior woman archetype and continues to inspire.
 1. Ellen Ripley
(The Alien Series) How many times does a woman have to space-lock or incinerate a creature?! We don’t know, but we’re all lucky Ellen Ripley, the ultimate Fictional Femme, is there to do it. She manages to survive alien attacks not once but three times (it counts in the last movie even if she is a clone) and even comes back after dying. Ripley flies spaceships, shoots guns, gets it on in a creepy prison, and refuses to let others do the dirty work for her. She also works a power loader like it is no one’s business. Mirroring the simplicity of her nemesis, it’s as though Ripley’s only purpose is to fight the encroaching invasion of this devastating species. A perfect foil for her frequent enemies, Ellen Ripley has no concept of gray areas. When it comes down to a contest between self promotion and the preservation of what is right, she decides overwhelmingly for the absolute moral good. Yes, caring, yes, strong, motivated, intelligent woman, but it is her capacity to defy selfishness even when staring at a fate worse than death (and doing so frequently and with nothing other than her humanity) that is truly remarkab from tick......................... Of curuse the women I love are in bold. and yes size matters... snickers But as for Number 1, there will never be anyone that can take her place.. Ripley, you are the WOMAN!!!!! |
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By Lisa Fary I always get my hopes up about so many things coming up in the next year and 2009 is no different. From conventions to movies to a new president, this is what I’m most looking forward to in 2009: The end of Battlestar Galactica: I’ve never looked forward to the end of a show the way I’m looking forward to this. After all these years of half seasons, character assassination, and various disappointments, I’m glad to have it all resolved and over. No, I can’t just stop watching and let it go. BSG, despite its many faults, drew me in and I need to see how it ends. I’m committed to this thing. Watchmen: I had been looking forward to Watchmen until Fox moved to block its release and a judge backed their claim (Really, Judge Whoever? Are you Rupert Murdoch’s bitch?). It’s not like Warner Bros made a big secret out of shooting the movie. It’s not like Watchmen hasn’t been all over the web for months. It’s not like Zack Snyder didn’t show up to Comicon (where I’m sure there were numerous Fox people) with a Watchmen trailer. I understand that it’s a legal issue, but Fox is demonstrating douchebaggery of evil proportions. New York Comicon: I haven’t been to a convention since the 2008 Phoenix Comicon, which was about a year ago. With NYCC, not only do I get to visit New York again, I get to stay at an awesomely tacky hotel in Chelsea, and will hopefully have an opportunity to meet some PRG writers who live in the area. Gotta say, though, I’m not looking forward to New York in early February and carting my cold weather wear around the con. More Torchwood: Sure, it’s only five hours, but it’s Torchwood. I’m dying to find out where the team goes without Tosh and Owen? Will they get new team members? Can one of them be Martha Jones? Please? New Pink Raygun Writers: This year we’re welcoming Higlet and Melissa Getreu. They’re both awesome and we’re exited to have them be a part of Pink Raygun! President Obama: Everything isn’t going to change the second he’s inaugurated. Not even within the first year, probably. But, after the past eight years (which, by the way, have sucked - if you really think we’re all better off now than we were when Clinton left office, you’re delusional. Sorry you had to find out this way) I’m relieved to have someone in the White House who has a freaking clue. About anything. And will keep his religion off our science. And recognizes that bridges shouldn’t fall down when driven on. And isn’t interested in letting his friends rape the environment. The list goes on. Star Trek: A couple months ago, there would have been no way in hell that JJ Abrams�?Star Trek reboot would have made my most-anticipated list. There was nothing I liked about what I was reading about it. However, the trailer bumped it right on the list. I know that trailers can be strategically cut, but damn. This Star Trek looks bad ass. Wizard World Philly: We’re not even sure who’s coming yet; we’re just thrilled to go to a convention that’s near our apartment and big enough that it can’t be held at a hotel. Back in Tucson, we had to drive several hours out of town - and make hotel reservations - to get to a mid-sized convention. Wizard World Philly is a ten block walk from home! Avatar: Not Shyamalan’s Last Airbender adaptation (Night has used up all of my faith in his abilities) - James Cameron’s science fiction film that has been in development since, like, forever. All news points to this thing being epic in scope - beyond Titanic or even the Star Wars sextet - and production. Given the size, I’m amazed that there has only been one piece of concept art leaked (which turned out to be fake) and very few leaked set photos (which may also be fake) that show nothing but shipping crates. The only official images are the t-shirt at the left and a photo of Cameron doing some directorial suff. After the darkness of BSG and the silliness of the prequels, I’m so ready for a new, original, unabashedly science fiction movie. And since it’s from James Cameron, I feel pretty good about it already. He’s never disappointed me before. And one thing I’m dreading. . . The return of 3D. There are a ton of movies in 3D coming out in 2009 and it’s not limited to crappy horror movies like My Bloody Valentine. 3D is leaking out to movies that don’t need to be in 3D. I doing something like Avatar in 3D, but A Christmas Carol? A Jonas Brothers concert? (not that I’m going to see that one, mind you, but really?) I’m not against an enhanced movie-going experience, but 3D gives me a headache. |
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