Palsied, dressed in only the classiest of a turban, sits on his couch, which is made of only the classiest of leather. He pets the pug on his lap, which is only the classiest of pug. He places his well manicured hand on his phone and brings it up to his ear as he dials Con's number on the base of his phone. (Haha, base).
Palsied: "Hello, Connypoo."
Con: "Hey, bitch."
Palsied: "What's up?"
Con: "I'm making love to someone, is this important?"
Palsied: "Not really. I just wanted to talk."
Con: "You wanted to what?"
Palsied: "Talk. So how was your day?"
Con: "I'm hanging up."
Palsied: "No, wait! I do have something important to say!"
Con: "Then get to it! This bitch isn't going to wait forever, and besides, she's waking up."
Palsied: "Alright, here goes-"
Con: "Shit, she's stirring. Hurry up, dickvagina!"
Palsied: "Con . . . I . . ."
Con: "Oh! Good morning, beautiful! I bet you're wondering what you're doing with your pants down and a headless baby seal on your chest. God damn you, Palsied."
Palsied: "I . . . love . . ."
Con: "Shit, baby! Don't leave! Come on! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT, TOMMY?!"
Palsied: "I loved the new Narnia movie! You should go see it with me!"
Con hangs up.
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