Learning to Listen

By Helen Rosenau

Too often we walk around thinking we know less than we do. We believe that if we only had an answer, or even a clue about the answer, or on really hard days even a better understanding of the question, that we’d be richer, braver, happier, smarter, better looking, more successful, or any other attribute that seems in short supply and great demand. That’s a lot to carry around.

We all strive to hear our inner voice. But sometimes there’s a lot of static. The cues are confused, subliminal, even contradictory. We’re unsure which voice to trust, which one to listen to. The extra donation to charity or a nicer gift for your niece? The chocolate bar now or the smaller jeans later? Staying at the office late or goofing off in the park?

How can we integrate and unify these messages? How can we live in the moment and still have long-term goals? Consider the various aspects of your self: emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical.

When you listen to your heart, what do you hear? If you’re lucky you’ve experienced the deep longing and excitement that comeswith love. You’ve ridden the sharpness of desire that pushes you to the edge of temptation. You’ve felt the strength of unconditional love, be it with a partner, a friend, a family member, or even a pet. Your heart teaches you intimacy, connection, and caring.

Focus on your mind. Recall your doubts and confusion when you feel thwarted or pessimistic. But then remember the acute clarity that comes with true knowing, with finding exactly the thread of logic to solve some thorny problem. Recall your triumphs, from a game of chess to a test in school to a winning proposal at work. Your mind gives you insight, imagination, and creativity.

Your spirit is the aspect of you that yearns to comprehend your purpose, your role in the grand design, in the web of life. Whether you focus on an external deity or your own inner light, your spirit has a deep, visceral desire to know why you are here, what it all means, and how to contribute. Your spirit speaks of purpose, of goodness, of your essential nature.

We all live with a sense of hope. We want our fears to be groundless and our visions to become manifest. We want to love and be loved. We want to believe in our own self-worth. We want to make something of our lives, and to share them with others.

And through all these intermingled filters, all these bouts of motivation and desire, despite all the fretting and second-guessing, you live your life, with a partner, profession, family, chores, hobbies. You live in the material world of responsibilities and achievements, which you pursue with energy and attain with pride. You live wanting to grow, on all levels, from the emotional to the material.

So how can you be ready to take advantage of life’s possibilities, to make progress in the outer world and your inner journey?

You need to do regular check-ins about what’s happening in your life and how you feel about it. You need to be honest about your own core values. You need to find clarity, and marry it to purpose. Need to find self, and put you into the world.

You can do this in just a few moments every week. If you are willing to be quiet enough you will hear your inner voice. Though the prism of your world is in flux, and the picture seems like a constantly shifting mirror, keep remembering that you are the element of continuity. You are its focal point. Your evolving sense of connection to, and confidence in, self-knowledge is exactly the key to success that you seek. This works both in the material world and in the evolution of your spirit.

You can learn everything you need to become your own best teacher, if you know your heart, hear your mind, and trust your spirit. If you can do these things, then your inner voice will become accessible and familiar, honest and trustworthy, a valuable teacher and a reliable guide.

Don’t be afraid to amplify your inner voice. If you do, you’ll hear the melody in your mind, feel the beat in your heart, and the joy in your soul. Some days will feel like rock and roll. Others might be a Hallelujah Chorus or a solo flute. But if you learn to listen, you’ll also learn to dance with your spirit. Then every other partner or goal you choose will reflect both your inner voice and your emerging sense of grace.

Helen Rosenau, Your Jewish Fairy Godmother, offers motivation, inspiration, support, and problem solving. She coaches clients about relationships, careers, creativity, life transitions, and overcoming self-sabotage or problems in any aspect of their personal and professional lives. Helen uses brains, heart, and chutzpah to create fulfilling and effective solutions. Come visit www.yourjewishfairygodmother.com. Everybody needs one!