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sorry
Clowns, I hate 'em
I'm leaving the chiropractor's for the massage therapist. Going down a small grade. At the bottom is a 90 degree right turn onto the freeway onramp. Several decades of experience have taught me to listen to my vehicle and drive accordingly rather than just look at the speed gauge and base my responses according to that only. Yes, that propensity has earned me more than one speeding ticket on clear roads, but it has also kept my vehicle on the road when others around me are losing control of theirs. Today, the car, the tires, and my experience are pegging the speed at 20 mph, with a suggested slow to 10- for negotiating the 90 degree turn. There was not a lot of sand on this particular road. And no lane for passing.
Unfortunately, Bozo the Clown behind me has a 4-wheel drive SUV with either chains or studded tires. He wants to go at least 30. I stupidly allow myself to go 25, and idiot boy stays on top on my rear bumper. Where's a gun when you need one? I move my left wheels into the unpacked snow at road center to slow down some without sliding, and at the last minute, to avoid getting rear-ended, I turn the wheels right. Yep, couldn't slow enough in time with a rear bumper clown ornament. My car slides left out of traction, skidding in slo-mo for the side of the road and one of those metal posts with a reflector on top. I'm busy gauging momentum, lack of friction for the tires, and depth of snow between me and the metal post.
Turns out I was right. There was enough snow to protect my fender. Meanwhile Bozo has clamped on his brakes, not only blocking the onramp from other cars, but blocking the street as well. He is sitting there with his flashers on, as though to protect me so he can come to my rescue. Swearing aloud, I won't give him the satisfaction of playing hero after causing the situation. Backing up about three feet I turn the tires to the right and spin 'em until the car slides back into the snow ruts and I can gain the onramp to the freeway. In my rearview I can see it takes him a minute to get back in his SUV and start up the ramp.
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