There's a place just north of nowhere,

Where the big ones tend to hide.

I've seen them in the mountains,

Over valleys deep and wide.

 

Age it is important,

But size does play a part.

They say you'll never find it,

If you haven't got the heart .

 

Nothing short of records,

Will be found amongst the land.

I've seen them croossing rainbows,

Too complete their final slam.

 

There's elk that break four hundred,

There's rams that broom like fists,

There's deer that outclass Hansons,

There's horns among the mist.

 

Very few have ever been there,

And those who have will never tell.

They say it's just pastsed heaven,

But the valleys pass though hell.

 

But if you ever find it,

You'll come accross a bridge.

There's a sign upon a fencepost,

That reads " NO-Tellum' Ridge ".