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General : "What on earth is stopping me?"  
 Message 1 of 3 in Discussion 
From: Joel  (Original Message)Sent: 12/30/2005 8:14 PM
Dear Joel,

I stopped from January 1997-February 2000-and started again
I stopped from February 2004-July 2005 and started again
Have done Cold Turkey on both occasions

Stopped December 2005 for 10 days- and started again
Stopped December 2005 for 3 days- and started again
Stopped December 2005 for another 3 days-and started again

I am so angry,I know i can do it,my brain just doesnt seem in the right
place,maybe i need to read more.
I know i can do it and do it quite easily so what on earth is stopping me?

Any advice-I think my BIG problem is my partner smokes and there is always
tobacco in the house so its so easy to have a puff.I am not using this as an
excuse but it must be an influence because if my partner didnt smoke then the
puff wouldnt be there.

Best Wishes Clare

First  Previous  2-3 of 3  Next  Last 
 Message 2 of 3 in Discussion 
From: JoelSent: 12/30/2005 8:26 PM
Hello Clare:
You basically have proven to yourself that you are able to quit. You have also proven to yourself how easy it is to relapse. Your idea of maybe needing to read more is right on the money. Not that you need to read more on how to quit--you know how to do this. What you need to focus your attention on is how to stay off. We have made a lot of information available for all on this very topic.
I am going to attach all of our relapse prevention article links below. Every one of these articles will give you the understanding of what went wrong with every one of your past failed quits. All you will need to do is to read the articles all the way through to the last four words on any of them. If you make it all the way to the end they will all make it abundantly clear that all you will need to do to make this quits last from January 30, 2005 to the rest of your likely extended and healthier life is to make and stick to a personal commitment to never take another puff.

The Smokers Vow

The Law of Addiction

"Just One Little Puff"

"Was I Addicted?"

Divine Revelations

Maybe I'm Different?

Everyone is Different

New Year's Resolution

Fixating on a Cigarette

Never Take Another Puff!

I Can't Quit or I Won't Quit

The Lucky Ones Get Hooked!

Negative Support From Others

"I feel 100% better since I Quit"

"I'm Not Going to Smoke Today!"

"New Reactions to Anger as an Ex-smoker"

"Why are you so hard on the concept of cheating?"

"Things were just so bad at work I had to take a cigarette!"

"If they ever cure lung cancer, I am going back to smoking!"

"I went back to smoking while in the hospital with pneumonia!"

Come Share Your Strength, Come Recognize Your Vulnerabilities

"You said it would get better!" "It's just as bad as the day I quit!"

"The only time I think of cigarettes is when I receive your stupid letters!"

"Help, I've Relapsed!" - a plea for help or a cry for attention?

 Message 3 of 3 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameJoeJFree-Gold-Sent: 12/31/2005 12:13 AM
Hello Clare,
My name is Joe, I was born addicted to nicotine and used tobacco in many forms to secure nicotine for just about 40 years until 1/10/05. 
I chose to write to you so I could let you know the same person who kept me from stopping (you really didn't say what) myself from smoking was ME.
What on earth keeps stopping you?  Same person - Yourself.
I know you can stop, you know you can stop - but go stand in front of a mirror and ask youself (and yes I mean this literally)
"When are you gonna stop stopping and just QUIT?!"
In order to quit smoking I found you had to only do one thing - QUIT SMOKING.
But you don't have to quit or even stop for a few days or a week or a month or a couple months or a year or even the rest of your life. 
You only have to decide to just not smoke A single cigarette (or take a chew or use a patch or chew some gum)
 - Just ONE is all you need to not use -
the NEXT one doesn't enter your body. 
Irregardless of whether you have a spouse that smokes or not the only person you need to be concerned about getting to quit smoking to no longer bring nicotine into your body is ... You.
Stop stopping (it infers you will start again like with a car) and just decide to quit allowing nicotine to control your every move.
You know how.  Do it Now.  Do it for you.  Do it for LIFE - you life which will be a better life when you decide you do not want to allow nicotine to control you every action and every thought.
Stop thinking about not smoking and begin to acknowledge that what we also have in common is that we are nicotine addicts.  If we want to maintain conrol over our addiction we just need to refuse to use, one day at a time.
If I could then so can you.  I believe you can & I hope you do too!