Hi Kate,
In your post, you address so many points to which I could relate myself so well. I completely understand what you mean. I can see that you are depressed and worried, you want to stop smoking but you don't know what will come next. But smoking is low class and you know it. You know you have to change something.
I think the key problem is the following: You come from a family of smokers, and your closest friends are smokers. Therefore, in the back of your mind there is that gloomy thought that all the good times, the bad times, everything you did with these people you love will not count any more. Even worse: There will be no more good times. It will be so different...
From my experience, the answer is both yes and no:
Yes, it will be different. When they go out for a cigarette, you might join them but you won't smoke. Maybe you won't join them out there though, because it is freezing cold and raining, and you don't want your coat to stink of cigarettes. (Isn't it great that you smell so nice now?)
No, it will be just the same. You won't change by stopping smoking. You will be still yourself. It is hard to imagine, I know. Smoking used to be a part of you and everything you did. But you can do everything you used to do as a smoker, just as well or even better without cigarettes. You have to believe me there. I swear it is true. *solemn oath*
Someone has to be the first one: My friends (used to) smoke, too. There is a group of ten people I meet regularly, and some of them are my closest friends. Many of them smoke. I was one of them. When the heaviest smoker of us all quit 15 months ago, I could not believe it. It almost felt like she had betrayed us smokers. I watched her being quit for three months, apparently having a good time, maybe even better than before. Then I quit, too. You might inspire your friends and family to quit, and help them save their lives.
If you woke up tomorrow and it would be the first anniversary of your being quit, what difference would it make? OK, you would be more comfortable in your quit. But apart from that, you would still wake up and make a vow that you will not smoke today.
Congratulate yourself every night for another smoke-free day accomplished. You can make quitting a lot easier if you think positive about it: You are not depriving yourself of something you need. You are getting rid of something that will kill you in the end. "My cigarette, my friend" is a good one to read.
Take it in small steps. "Never take another puff" does not mean: Think about the next fifty years without smoking. It means, even when you are tempted, do not take that fateful first puff.
38 days is a long time. You have come a long way already. A good investment! 
PinkFlowers
Investing since 2 March 2005
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