WHY IT'S GREAT TO BE A Guy!

* A 5 day holiday requires only one suitcase

* Toilet Lines are 80% shorter

* We can open all our own jars

* Phone conversations last 30 seconds

* We know useful stuff about cars and airplanes

* Old friends don't care if we've lost or gained weight

* When TV surfing, we don't have to stop on every shot of someone crying

* Our last name stays put

* We can leave a hotel room bed unmade.

* We can kill our own food

* The garage is all ours

* We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness

* We never have to clean the toilet

* We can be showered and ready in 10 minutes

* If someone forgets to invite us to something, they can still be our friend

* Our underwear costs $4.99 for a pack of 3

* None of our co-workers have the power to make us cry

* We don't have to shave below our neck

* If we're 34 and single, no one notices

* Chocolate is just another snack

* We can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat

* Flowers & duct tape - and we can fix everything

* We never have to worry about other's feelings

* Three pair of shoes are more than enough

* We can say anything and not worry about what people think

* We can whip our shirt off on a hot day

* Car mechanics tell us the truth

* We don't give a flip if someone doesn't notice our new haircut

* We can watch a game in silence for hours without our friend thinking "He must be mad at me."

* One mood, all the time

* We can admire Clint Eastwood without having to starve ourselves to look like him.

* Same work. More pay.

* Gray hair and wrinkles add character

* Wedding dress; $5000 Tux rental; 100 bucks

* We don't care if someone is talking behind our back

* We don't pass on the dessert and then insist upon sharing someone elses

* The remote is all ours

* We need not pretend we're "freshening up" to use the bathroom

* We can go to the bathroom alone

* If we don't call our friend when we said we would, he won't tell our friends I've changed

* If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, we might become lifelong buddies

* If something mechanical didn't work, we can hit it with a hammer and throw it across the room

* New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle our feet