How to keep a healthy level of insanity:

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and
Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They

Want Fries with That.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone

Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors"

7. Finish all Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. dont use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

11. Sing Along At The Opera.

12. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme.

13. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play

Tropical Sounds All Day.

14. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

15. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards

The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

16. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, we are

Going to have To Let One Of You Go."