Hi Sha, Sue, "Group" ..... ;-)
Thanks for the welcome and please forgive me my ill manners.... I should have introduced myself prior to posting.
I have garnered much from this group's posts and I want to thank you all.
~~~~~~~That being said.~~~~~~~
Hello everyone, my name is Susan/Sue (which ever) and I'm an addict. As I said in my post re: floaters, I'm 49 (eeeeeeowwwwwch!!!!!!!!! that hurts) widowed and in recovery.
Recovery is going well and I pray daily for a reunion with my children.My four grandchildren love me and we "hang" whenever we can but their parents are, shall I say, a wee bit PO'd at me.
My story is not in any way unique but perhaps some of you can relate.
I was a "speed freak" in the late 60's & 70's who "dabbled" with anything and everything until I found the love of my life and began our family.
My husband was shot and killed in 1980 and that's when I fell down and went boom. (For you who may have concerns... the children were well cared for by two wonderful sets of grandparents)
I was, for all intents and purpose, LOST. Twenty-four,facing cancer surgery and scared "chitless that GOD or whoever was in charge would see how much I loved those kids and take them away too that I ran into drugs, booze whatever and stayed there off and on for 20 yrs.
Recovery for me is akin to "self discovery".. some days are good...some days aren't.. some hours are good.....some hours last a week.
Today is a TERRIFIC day! The sun is shining and the rent is paid and all is well in Sue's world!
My recovery began because one day I looked in a mirror and hated who I saw. I couldn't find one redeeming thing in that mirror and I reached out and was blessed.
My younger brother had just gotten out of rehab and we were talking... I had ZERO wisdom to impart so for the first time in my adult life I listened, saw he had something I dearly wanted and me being the elder sibling ( somewhat jealous...ya see?) just had to have it. It's been no picnic!!! Hell, it's been an awful lot of continuing work. But...Peace of mind and those not so rare anymore moments of "calm" are worth the price.
I attempt to live by a simple creed:
I may not be where I want to be....but....I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
Keeping it simple & real in Ontario, Canada & wishing you all Peace....
Susan