"This is the plan determined for the whole earth,
This is the hand stretched out over all nations.
For the Lord Almighty has purposed, and who can tharwt Him?
His hand is stretched out, and who can turn it back?"
Isaiah 14:26-27
Suspended time...
It is a peculiar ability of the mind to suspend natural movement so that it appears to be occurring in slow motion. I experienced this phenomenon as I followed the movements of the soldier whose task it was to open and unload the final storage compartment of our bus. I watched with an emotional mixture of fear and fascination, as though the events occurring before me were part of a movie scene being played out before my eyes. Teammate #2 later recalled whispering something in my ear, which I did not acknowledge. With every ounce of my being transfixed on the soldier's actions, it was highly unlikely that I would have perceived her speech.
More suspended time...
Although all else around me was shut off from sensory perception, I was acutely aware of the female soldier who stood just behind and to the right side of me. I could actually feel her bodily presence, which caused a tingling sensation to travel along my spine. In an odd way, it was though only myself, the female soldier, and the soldier opening the remaining storage compartment were the only people involved the unfolding events. This was how completely focalized my attention was.
And more suspended time...
I began to sense that I was experiencing a slight physical discomfort. In my anticipation, I had drawn in and held my breath, cutting off my oxygen flow. I released my breath in a slow and exaggerated sigh. The tingling sensation continued along my spine.
Yet more suspended time...
I became subconsciously aware that something was wrong, but couldn't quite process what that "something" was. Suddenly, it dawned on me...
It was taking much too long to open the final storage compartment.
It finally became obvious to me that I was no longer experiencing the false reality of suspended time. A true delay was occurring in the unfolding events. My altered sense of reality dissapated and I took in the scene around me. The soldier standing in front of the storage compartment had been joined by the bus driver. The soldier scowled as the bus driver huddled over an area of the compartment door. I could tell by the jerking movements of the driver's arms that he was vigorously fumbling with the compartment's door handle. It was clear that the driver was having no success with getting the compartment to open. The scowling soldier, whose arms had been crossed, abruptly pushed the bus driver aside and began jerking the door's handle with great force. The sound emanating from the door handle was deafening in comparison to the surrounding silence. Although all passengers and several guards had congregated near the unfolding scene, no one moved or spoke.The assault on the door handle continued for what seemed like ten minutes.
In exasperation, the soldier let out an exclamation which I could only assume to be some Arabic curse word...it certainly wasn't a word supplied in my Arabic language books. The soldier then proceeded to bark out a command which sent the female soldier scrambling toward the nearby building. With all that was happening, I had completely forgotten about my former nemesis.
My body began to visibly shake as I processed what I then knew to be happening.
"This is it. This is definitely Your doing, Jesus." I excitedly prayed.
When the female soldier returned she was trailing another soldier who held a crowbar type apparatus. This new soldier shoved aside the soldier who had thus far been unsuccessful and began to pry at the stubborn door.
No go.
At some point, unbeknownst to me, I had regained my bodily movement. I turned to visually seek out my teammates. My and teammate #1's eyes locked. Although her eyes betrayed a lingering apprehension, teammate #1's mouth was twisted into a odd looking half smile-half smirk. Teammate #2's mouth hung slightly ajar and she appeared mesmerized by all that was occurring. I was certain she was mentally existing in that altered "movie watching" state that I had recently come out of. All she needed was a bucket of popcorn and some raisinettes.
"You go, God!" I prayed, struggling not to smile. "Handle Your business!"
My newfound elation gave way to a sobering realization...
"I felt doubt." I admitted guiltily. "I'm sorry I wasn't more faithful."
I immediately felt that wash of soothing peace which I have now come to understand as my God saying: "It's okay".
Teammate #1 was in no way struggling to hide her emotional state. She was beaming from ear to ear. Her far away look cued me that she was also conversing with God. Teammate #2 must have come to an "intermission". She approached me and grabbed hold of my hand. Her palm was hot and wet with perspiration, but oddly comforting. I didn't pull away.
"It's Jesus!" she whispered, hardly containing her excitement. "He's saving us!"
I was suddenly startled by a loud repetition of "booms", which were caused by
the forceful kicks of a furious soldier against the offending compartment's door. The soldier who had originally attempted to open the remaining storage compartment spoke gruffly to the bus driver, who then waved his hands towards the door of the bus and yelled instructions at us passengers. Obediently, passengers began hoarding onto the bus.
They were allowing us go!
I sank heavily back into my old familiar seat. A seat never felt so glorious. As the bus pulled out from the border checkpoint, I began praising God. I don't believe I (or my teammates) stopped praising Him for the duration of that bus trip! The rest of the bus trip proved uneventful...which certainly was fine with the three of us.
At the stop which preceeded our final destination, I disembarked to use the restroom. While waiting in line, I felt a familiar tap on my shoulder.
"You will visit here long?" It was the University student, ever bubbly.
"A few weeks." I had now developed my own bubbliness.
"Will you someday return?"
"Maybe not here, but I do love the Middle East and hope to come back."
"If you again come to my country," the student offered,
"my village shall be your village and my home shall be your home."
The young woman was demonstrating the Arab hospitality we would routinely encounter throughout our journey.
"That would give me great honor." I replied with sincerity.
The student gushed at my response. Arabs derive much pleasure from
bestowing honor on their guests. Her final words were strangely prophetic:
"Maybe you shall return for a longer time and shall accomplish many things."
"All that you desire in your heart, Insha' Allah."
"Insha' Allah" I repeated back to her,
mimicking the Arabic phrase most often spoken throughout the Middle East:
"If God wills"
Epilogue
What an awesome God we serve. What a loving Father we belong to!
The above testimony describes an unquestionable demonstration of God's faithfulness in protecting His own. It was one of several powerful incidents which my teammates and I experienced during our recent mission in the Arab World. We came to realize that God was purposefully behind each incident, using them as a means to teach the three of us an extremely important lesson. We needed to ultimately learn not to rely on our own capabilities, strengths, and ingenuities in carrying out God's plan of salvation for His lost children. We had to begin the necessary process of developing COMPLETE trust and reliance on HIS capabilities, HIS strengths, and HIS ingenuities.
Prior to embarking on this journey, my teammates and I had a preconceived notion about what our mission was to be. However, we soon discovered that God's primary mission during our journey was to begin significantly shaping us into the future missionaries He desired us to be. Shortly after the incident at the (country deleted)border, God revealed to me that the trust and reliance He required from me could only be developed through deeper intimacy with Him. Therefore, my real mission as an Ambassador for Jesus was to KNOW GOD. To know Him so intimately that my trust and reliance would consistently come, without doubt or hesitation. So intimately that I could consistently discern His voice. And so intimately that I could consistently determine His will and act upon it, without question. God cautioned me that until I developed such reliance, He couId never truly use me for what His Son had called me forth to perform.
While God could have easily allowed the "tampon ploy" to be successful, would we have truly credited Him with this ingenuity....or ourselves? Many times, we Christians are quick to proclaim, "Praise God!", while within our hearts we secretly harbor pride regarding the "assists" we have provided Him. During the border incident, our Father and faithful Protector needed to show us His undeniable hand of protection in a way which we could never proclaim involvement. In doing this He proved once again that His promise is true: "I will never leave nor forsake you."
Throughout our journey, God continued to develop our reliance in Him not only through acts of protection. Time and again, He provided divine opportunities for us to witness which invariably occurred after our own ingenious and "sure fire" plans for creating these opportunities had fallen through. And those times, when we least felt capable of effectively witnessing; times when we were extremely ill or physically exhausted, were the VERY times when the Spirit surged strongest within us and our witnessing became most effective. We literally felt the Spirit take over and His words rush forth from our mouths!!!
And while I must admit that I heaved an ENORMOUS sigh of relief when, nearly five weeks later, the last load of contraband material was safely placed in the hands of our final long term contacts, I never experienced the same doubt that had plagued me during the previous border incident. For I understood, with certainty, that whatever would have transpired regarding those materials...even detainment...my Father would neither leave nor forsake me. He would faithfully make a way out of no way.
How comforting it is to realize that we belong to a God who calls us forth in weakness and allows us to be mighty through His power. How assuring it is that we belong to a God Who loves us as we are, but never allows us to stay that way. I have a much more intimate relationship with God than I had before landing on Arab soil several months ago. And although I have quite a way to go before I'm where my Heavenly Father desires me to be....I'm excited about the journey.
By the way, are any of you wondering how we retrieved our contraband luggage?
Much to the bus driver's annoyance, when we reached our final destination we apologetically mentioned that our luggage was stored in the hopelessly stuck storage compartment. To the dejected driver's amazement, when he halfheartedly jiggled the handle of the stubborn compartment door, it immediately popped open without any effort.
And to MY amazement, our contraband suitcases were the only items
located within.
I will exalt You, My God and King;
I will praise Your name forever and ever.
Every day I will praise You and extol Your name for ever and ever.
Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise;
His greatness no one can fathom...
The Lord is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and rich in love.
The Lord is good to all;
He has compassion on all He has made.
...Your saints will extol You.
They will tell of the glory of Your Kingdom and speak of Your might;
so that all men may know of Your mighty acts...
The Lord is faithful to all His promises and loving to all He has made...
The Lord is righteous in all His ways and loving to all He has made.
The Lord is near to all who call on Him,
to all who call on Him in truth.
He fulfills the desires of those who revere Him;
He hears their cry and saves them...
Psalm 145
THE END
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