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Verses : Things My Mother Taught Me.
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From: NineMSN NicknameJustmegreatnanrobinson  (Original Message)Sent: 16/08/2007 11:42 AM



 

Things My Mother Taught Me.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.  "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.  "If you don't straighten  up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of  next week!" 
 4. My mother taught me LOGIC.  " Because I said so, that's why."
 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC  "If you fall out of that swing and  break your neck, you're not going to  the store with me." 
 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.  "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
 7. My  mother taught me IRONY  "Keep crying, and I'll give you  something to cry about."
 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .  "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.  "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.  "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER .  "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.  "If I told you once, I've told  you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.  "I brought you into this  world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.  "Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.  "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't  have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.  "Just wait until we get home." 
 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .  "You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.  "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that  way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.  "Put your sweater on; don't you think I  know when you are cold?"
 20. My mother taught me HUMOR .  "When that lawn mower cuts off your  toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.  "If you don't eat  your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
 22. My mother taught me GENETICS.  "You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS .  "Shut that door behind  you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught meWISDOM.  "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE "One day you'll
have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU" !!! plus one more
26 My Mother taught me about bones "If you keep swallowing that chewing
gum all your bones will stick together" !

 

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