Smiling Fibros

as some of you know it was a year since my mom passed away on 24 September....................i miss her so much but i also know she is in a better place with my dad..................my mom was born in scotland and moved over here in her early twenties..............i can remember growing up and constantly fighting with my mom cause i never thought she understood me................it was the opposite i later found out..........the trouble was that we were so much alike and our personalities would clash when i was in the teenage years.................after getting into my early twenties and then having my first child it was my mom i wanted the most...................all the books you read when you are pregnant and all the things that people tell you still do not prepare you for when you take that little bundle of joy home for the first time................i even stopped on the way home from the hospital to pick my mom up and she came over to my place for the first few days.....................i think it was then when we made such a special bond together that it only grew stronger from there..............my mom was never selfish and never tried to show favortism with her children or grandchildren..................if i needed anything and if it was possible for her to give it to me she would...............every sunday i would still be at my parent;s place having sunday dinner and as i had my second child thats a tradition that carried on for many years.................6 years ago my father was dignosed with cancer and he had a fierce battle with it........my dad's dream was to see my son turn 16 but unfortunately the cancer was too far advanced and he passed away 3 years ago....................for the last year of his life i left my job and spent my time taking my dad to treatments and surgery and just basically caring for him every day.................my mom was sick with lung cancer at the same time so i knew where my priorties were through the day................i was with my dad to the very end in the hospital and held him as god came for him.....................after that i just took over taking care of my mom..........we had so many good times together that i cannot count them all and although my parents didnt have alot of money they helped me out with buying my house.............i used to call my mom or go over there every day or take her shopping or drs appointments and the hardest after she passed away was i kept thinking that phone would ring and it would be my mom..................even 4 months later on my birthday i still expected her to call and wish me happy bday..................it was around that time i was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and everything made sense then...............yes i still hurt and have fuzzy mind at times and everything else that goes with it but at least i have something and it explains so much..............even as my mom was in her hospital bed just before she passed away she would always ask me how i was feeling and forget about her own pain...............she passed away in her sleep at the hospital and i never got to say goodbye to her like i did with dad but knowing my mom that is the way she would have wanted it.

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Smiling Fibros	[email protected]