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General : The Obama Joke Thread
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 Message 1 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameGold-PlatedDiapers  (Original Message)Sent: 11/11/2008 3:11 AM
 
So I recall that many said that the comedians were giving Obama a pass. My thought is that he doesn't give them too much amunition, but nonetheless, I'm sure that Obama jokes are starting to make the rounds. I figured that this would be a good thread to collect them. It can be a youtube video, something you got in a e-mail or the standard Jay/Dave/Conan/Jimmy/the guy that comes on after Dave that used to be on Drew Carey's show.
 
First are two that I made up on my own:
 
Tuesday night Bill Clinton called Barack Obama and congratulated him on becoming the second black president.
 
Last Tuesday David Duke called up Obama to congratulate him on becoming the 44th white president.
 
The other one was funny. It's from Jay Leno. I'm paraphrasing it but you'll get the point:
 
"Today President elect Obama named his new chief of staff Rohm Emmanuel. Now you see, he promised us change and here he's delivering on it--NO GUYS WITH REGULAR NAMES! Barrack and Rohm sounds like a sci-fi movie."


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 Message 2 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameKyKarenSueSent: 11/11/2008 6:09 AM
As his first official act, Barack Obama must raise Joe the Plumber's taxes. I'm not saying he should raise all middle-class taxes. Just Joe. Congratulations, plumber's helper, you're in a tax bracket of one. Complete with your very own tax form, the 1040FU.   -Bill Maher   New Rules

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 Message 3 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameKyKarenSueSent: 11/11/2008 6:14 AM
If he puts a moon roof in the presidential limo, he's not making himself Fuhrer; he's just trying to get the smell of stupidity out of the seats.

Bill Maher - New Rules



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 Message 4 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameKyKarenSueSent: 11/11/2008 6:15 AM
And, mostly, I don't want to hear about ACORN. Your guy lost by eight million votes. Just because you don't know any black people doesn't mean they don't exist.
Bill Maher - New Rules

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 Message 5 of 16 in Discussion 
From: NoseroseSent: 11/11/2008 12:06 PM
The Irish claim "O'Bama" as their own.
 

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 Message 6 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameRbshoots1Sent: 11/11/2008 12:31 PM
  Riddle for the  Day


Hillary, Biden and Obama were on a  donkey, at the edge of a cliff. 
The donkey got spooked and jumped off the cliff.
Who was  saved?




AMERICA  

 

 


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 Message 7 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamealaska0867Sent: 11/11/2008 6:03 PM
Good luck with this thread.

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 Message 8 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameGold-PlatedDiapersSent: 11/11/2008 6:04 PM
The Onion did a hillarious job of nailing it down:
 

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 Message 9 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknamePukedragonSent: 11/11/2008 11:48 PM
so Obama walks into Congress and goes
 
"Lalalallalalallalal ALLAH ACKBAR" and blows himself up
 
 
the end

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 Message 10 of 16 in Discussion 
From: TajSent: 11/11/2008 11:54 PM
definitely a joke...

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 Message 11 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameGold-PlatedDiapersSent: 11/12/2008 3:10 AM
I've heard this one about every president since Reagan, it's time to insert Obama's name into it...
 
Three college age guys are jogging by the Potomac River when the see a person fall off a bridge into the freezing water. They all dive in to rescue the person who turns out to be President Obama. After they're all dried off Obama says
"Gentlemen, thanks for saving my life, is there any thing, even just one thing that I can do to repay you?"
The first guy says
"I've always wanted to ride on Airforce One!"
Obama says
"No problem, I'm flying to the coast tomorrow, pack your stuff tonight!"
The second guy says
"Well, my dad has always wanted to see me in uniform..."
Obama stops him
"Say no more, you start in West Point next week."
The third guy after thinking for a while says
"I think I'd like to be burried in Arlington Cemetary"
Obama looks at him strangely and says
"Listen, as the President that's one of many things that I can do...but you're a young guy, with your whole life ahead of you. Why would you want that?"
The guys looks at him and says
"Well, when my family finds out who I pulled out of the river today..."

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The number of members that recommended this message. 0 recommendations  Message 12 of 16 in Discussion 
Sent: 11/12/2008 3:34 AM
This message has been deleted by the author.

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 Message 13 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nickname_Driver_7Sent: 11/12/2008 3:36 AM
President Obama is walking along and comes across a little boy trying to find homes for a litter of puppies. 
Obama askes, "What kind of puppies are these?"
The little boy says, "They are Liberals!"   Obama smiles and walks away.....
 
A week later President Obama walks by the same little boy with a few puppies who need homes....
Obama asks, "What kind of puppies are these?"
Little boy says, "They are Conservatives!"
Obama is confused, and says, "But, last week you said they were Liberals...!"
 
Little boy:   "But Now they have their eyes opened!"
 
 


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 Message 14 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamemari67151Sent: 11/14/2008 8:52 AM

 

Why should Obama have choosen Evan Bayh for VP?

The name Birch Evans Bayh III makes Barack Hussein Obama sound almost normal.

Bayh is married to a former Miss Southern California beauty queen. Obama is married to a woman who wants to be queen.

Bayh doesn't use drugs so Barack's stash will be safe.

Bayh was born with a tiny silver spoon in his mouth. Obama had a tiny silver spoon on his neckchain.

They both have secret pasts. Obama's past is secret because he shredded the records. Bayh's is secret because nobody cares.

*********************

Barack Obama's Fake Birth Certificate

Q. Why won't Obama release his real birth certificate?

A. He's deciding which of his names (Barack Barry Hussein Obama Soetoro) to put on it.

***

Q. Why won't Obama release his real birth certificate?

A. The ink isn't dry yet.

***

Q. Why won't Obama release his real birth certificate?

A. Hillary Clinton won't give it back to him.

***

Q. Why won't Obama release his real birth certificate?

A. He wants to surprise us at his swearing in.

***

Q. Why won't Obama release his real birth certificate?

A. He accidently smoked it.

***

Q. Why won't Obama Messiah release his real birth certificate?

A. It shows that he didn't have a virgin birth.

***

Q. Why won't Obama Messiah release his real birth certificate?

A. It got mixed in with his Rezko mortgage records and shredded.


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 Message 15 of 16 in Discussion 
From: TajSent: 11/14/2008 5:53 PM
Obama rap:
 
 
 

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 Message 16 of 16 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameDunjuz_WrongSent: 11/23/2008 11:13 PM
What do you get when you cross an Obama with a banana?
 
 
 
A politician with a peel.
 
 
 
How many poiticians does it take to change a light bulb?
 
 
 
 
 
 
Who needs light when you've got your head that far up each others butt?

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