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| | From: PoppyG1945 (Original Message) | Sent: 10/5/2008 12:21 PM |
my space is sacred bread a cloistered place unbound, the warmth of simple fire deep silence my attire, if only bordered in my head. blessed be the soul that dreams who sails beyond the daily noise, unscathed by time's annoying power, content with just the beauty of each hour, who sails alone upon life's stream./ poppyg |
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| | From: gypsy | Sent: 10/6/2008 4:39 AM |
The Vagabond Give to me the life I love, Let the lave go by me, Give the jolly heaven above And the byway nigh me. Bed in the bush with stars to see, Bread I dip in the river - There's the life for a man like me, There's the life for ever. Let the blow fall soon or late, Let what will be o'er me; Give the face of earth around And the road before me. Wealth I seek not, hope nor love, Nor a friend to know me; All I seek, the heaven above And the road below me. Or let autumn fall on me Where afield I linger, Silencing the bird on tree, Biting the blue finger. White as meal the frosty field - Warm the fireside haven - Not to autumn will I yield, Not to winter even! Let the blow fall soon or late, Let what will be o'er me; Give the face of earth around, And the road before me. Wealth I ask not, hope nor love, Nor a friend to know me; All I ask, the heaven above And the road below me. Robert Louis Stevenson
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Oh to have the pen of RLS...Thanks for sharing |
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This was lovely & soothing to read here in the early hours of the morning. my space is sacred bread a cloistered place unbound, the warmth of simple fire deep silence my attire, if only bordered in my head. blessed be the soul that dreams who sails beyond the daily noise, unscathed by time's annoying power, content with just the beauty of each hour, who sails alone upon life's stream. I found the last line of the first stanza a little difficult to get my head round though. But it might just be me. Maybe it's the word bordered I stumbled on. I shall come back & read again in the daylight and see how it gels then. Enjoyed this, Poppy |
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thank you i suspect i am one of those who really enjoy retreating to my "cerebal cell".. my inner hermitage. |
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i wasn't tripped by 'bordered', it was 'annoying' that made me twitch. and i wanted the last line to be stronger. it's the only one that feels like it rhymes for rhyming's sake. the rest i liked a lot, flowed despite the form. i'm interested in more. g |
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sorry, that wasn't specific enough. by "annoying" making me twitch, i mean that the rest of the poems uses a certain tone/voice. "annoying" seemed out of step with that. like everything has these nice rounded tones and that word struck nasal and buzz-like. there, that's what i meant to say. g |
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| | From: _susan_ | Sent: 10/9/2008 12:36 AM |
good meter, good rhyme scheme. s. |
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| | From: gypsy | Sent: 10/9/2008 7:07 PM |
Solitude: a curving comma slowly slipping into period. |
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| | From: ^~JustL | Sent: 10/11/2008 4:29 AM |
i may be going solo with this proverbial idea that the last stanza would do quite well standing alone.
cheers
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Perhaps, it does summarize what I am trying to say. The wonder of words is the infinite variety of possibility in combination, hopefully mediated by the creative breath. Thanks for your comments. G |
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This message has been deleted by the author. |
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