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: The Road To "Happiness..." |
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I read a Calvin and Hobbes comic once where Calvin asks Hobbes what he wishes for and is outraged when Hobbes answers he wishes for a tuna sandwich. He goes into a rant about using his imagination and wishing for money, power, prestige, and all kinds of things. The next scene has Hobbes contentedly eating a tuna sandwich going, "I got my wish," while Calvin just glares. :-D
I used to push myself hard. I think it was a mix of trying to prove to myself and others that I wasn't messed up as some said I was and the hubris that I could personally change the world through inspiration & action. But as I got older, I came to relax and enjoy the moment a lot more. Sure I prepare for the future, try to shape what my own future will be like and all, but I try putting more of my energy into the now. And I'm much happier for it.
A little over 2 years ago was when I really started to enjoy life more after a major epiphany for me. I was fighting off the flu and a low grade depression when a friend called and invited us to go surfing with them. Given that it was cloudy, lightly raining, and the way I felt, I was wanting to turn them down but my roomie wanted us to go, so we went.
And I'm so glad I did.
Not only was just getting out good, but they had me try windsurfing for the first time. I had to hold my feet differently and use the harness and that took me a few minutes, but WHOOSH! And then the sun came real close to coming out while the wind made me go really fast and the ocean turned from gray to aqua and I shouted in ecstasy, I felt so fused to the entire scene--mist, ocean, LIFE. I knew then that every pain and horror in my life had been worth enduring just to experience this one utterly beautiful and ineffable moment, and should my life flash before my eyes before I die, I know I'll recall that morning, and if it effects my body, I'll smile one last time.
My depression was utterly gone. For the time, so was my lowgrade flu, and though it came back after a few hours, I was completely over the next day (when it had been lingering). It really put zest in my step. I think if more people took time off to do something like that, psychiatry would be an endangered profession.
I'd learned it before and forgot. But this time, I remembered. And I've been happier ever since.
Btw, hunting can have a similar effect. And even target shooting can make the world melt away for awhile.
One last thing: Being agnostic, I don't even have any definitive beliefs on an afterlife and simply assume that there won't be any (or if there is, that I'll be so transformed as to "not be me" anymore), so the way I see it, my life is all I have. And I can either enjoy it as best I can, or I can make myself miserable. I choose the former.
Of course, there's some balance there. I'm happy, but that's not the same as being fully content. I do have plans, ambitions, and the like, and I do prepare and work for them. But I also work to keep things in perspective, and realize that right now is about all I'm truly guaranteed to ever have and act accordingly. |
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| | From:  444Hal | Sent: 2/24/2008 3:00 PM |
I’ve walked and sometimes dragged (kicking & screaming) into positions of more authority & responsibility and always found it really wasn’t worth the money and aggravation. I’ve learned it’s better to live within my means than sucking down a lot of Paxel. |
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| | | From: 444Hal | Sent: 2/24/2008 3:51 PM |
I should have added that one of my core believes is.... Work is time you take out of your life (that you’ll never get back) that you give to your employer in exchange for money to pay your bills and buy things. You can’t avoid bills but ya gotta think if that next possession is worth that many hours out of your life. A while ago I made a comment one Monday morning at work at how we we’re all sucking down coffee and trying to get rid of that miserable Monday morning work blase  while my (welfare case) neighbors are sitting on their porches all cheerful & waving at passerbys and enjoying life while we’re here trying to keep from biting each others head off. Maybe they have the right idea . |
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| | | From: Sarge | Sent: 3/9/2008 1:26 AM |
Well this move to Alaska has made me look at my life differently. Sometimes I was at odds with my family. I was putting the things I wanted to do first and my family last. Well when you are sitting in a lonely apartment all by yourself your family is in your mind an awful lot. However in this case I was up there getting us out of debt and preparing for our future, but it still was darn lonely. Now that I am home I treasure their voices and want to be close to them all the time. I made the decision to quit teaching Hunter Safety classes. I have taught over 5000 kids and taken years of time away from my family. I was teaching 35 to 40 classes a year, almost every week I was gone. So when I got home I told Lt. Linda that I was not teaching Hunter Safety classes any more. Such a beautiful smile I got from her. It almost made me want to stop teaching something else just to see it again. As far as health goes, I am very healthy so I look forward to a long and productive life. I made the decision at the age of 15 yrs old to never drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes. And I have stuck to that promise to myself. My long term goal is.....To outlive all my enemies. And I am well along on my goal. I have outlived two wives and a whole lot of ex-inlaws. And some bad people that wanted to shoot me and my squad,They lost their goals when we shot first and more accurately. Sarge |
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oh but Sarge, you're missing out on a whole lot of wonderful Irish whisky... in moderation of course.... |
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