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Just for a Laugh : Friday Groaners
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 Message 1 of 1 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknamePaleshyone  (Original Message)Sent: 2/13/2009 3:01 PM
  • Why can't you be a non-conformist like everybody else?
  • Always remember, you are unique, just like everybody else.
  • The depressed patient and his therapist were discussing recreational drug use, and the popular image of a frying egg being characterized as a person's brain if he uses drugs. To the therapist the patient said "visualize a raw egg; then visualize it being cracked into a skillet of hot oil. That's my brain on reality!"
  • Did you hear Mary Poppins retired to California and became a really good astrologer? Apparently, she specializes in helping people with bad breath. Her shingle reads: "Super California Mystic - Expert: Halitosis."
  • Did you hear about the girl named ALLISON who got a new boyfriend who was a tractor dealer? She sent her old boyfriend a John Deere letter. He may have a CASE against her for desertion. When she later dumped the tractor salesman, he cried, "while my John Deere was plowing the field, your Dear John was breaking my heart."
  • Jay Leno, doing "Iron Jay" (an intellectually challenged fitness enthusiast, with a big chin), was asked what he had to say about 2% milk. "Well, the 2% milk is ok, I guess; but you have to wonder what the other 93% is."
  • What STD do birds get? ... Chirpies. ... It is a CARDINAL disease; and it is untweetable.
  • If Lisa Presley has Michael Jackson's baby, is it a glove child?
  • Is a pirate ship a thugboat?
  • One Pirate to another, "do you want to come to the corn roast?"
    • "How much?"
    • "A buck an ear."
  • If you want a computer-type to hurry up, do you tell him "fiche or cut byte?" If he wants you to hurry up, you can tell him "ROM wasn't built in a day."
  • Do you know what you get when you cross a pit-bull terrier with a computer? I don't know either, but when it Megabytes it Megahertz.
  • The most frustrating computer error message of all time: "Keyboard not responding. F1 to proceed


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