We had broken-in our new quarterdeck watchstanders on how to handle and be safe with the .45 pistol.  What everyone forgot was that we had not allowed them to practice with the ship's communication system (called the 1MC circuit).  The 1MC is a general broadcast circuit that allows the user to make general announcements throughout the ship.  It is part of the ship's internal communications system of phones and annunciators.  The quarterdeck had one of these: a telephone with a push-to-talk button and an array of switches that allowed the speaker to speak to all or to only certain parts of the ship.  The same thing applies to the Bosun's Mate of the Watch (BOOW) on the ship's bridge.

 

Life aboard a ship has a certain rhythm.  There are announcements that come over the 1MC at various times during the day: call to breakfast, lunch, and dinner; call to quarters; call for morning, noon, and evening reports; call for clean-up; and call for light's out (or taps).  All of these calls are memorized -- if by no other means than osmosis -- because they become part of one's daily routine.  When someone deviates from the script, your ears perk up.  And so it was this evening.

 

This was the first watch that this petty officer had stood where he was to pass the word to the crew over the 1MC circuit.  He was a second class storekeeper (SK2) and a Filippino.  Combine the newness of the watch and his a natural insecurity, and it's no wonder that he got stage fright.  The result was history.

 

At 2130 (9:30 pm) the quarterdeck watch (at anchor) or BOOW (underway) passes the word for "sweepers" over the 1MC.  Sweepers are designated people in the different compartments that sweep down the area, and pickup debris and trash for dumping later.  The script goes something like this: "Sweepers. Sweepers, man your brooms.  Give the ship a clean sweep down fore and aft.  Sweep down all ladders and passageways.  Dump trash and garbage over the fantail.  Now, Sweepers."

 

So at 2130, SK2 Jamie Arroyo (not real name) raised the phone of the 1MC and pushed the button: "Sweepers.  Ah, Sweepers.  Sweep down the ship fore and aft.  Hit the passageways, do the ladders, and dump the shitcans over the fantail."

 

Everything sort of stopped in our berthing compartment.  We all looked at each other with the "I didn't hear what I thought I heard" looks.  There were a few snickers and we then continued to finish up what we were doing before turning in for the night.

 

Lights out (or Taps) goes down at 2200 (10:00 pm).  The normal script is: "Now, Taps, Taps.  All hands turn-in to your own bunks.  Maintain silence about the decks.  The smoking lamp is out in all berthing spaces.  Taps."

 

A half hour after his first performance, SK2 Arroyo pushed the button on the 1MC again:  (Burst of static) Now, Taps, Taps.  Turn out de lights.  No smoking, god dammit!  (Burst of static).  After a pause for it to sink in, this was followed by hysterical laughter thoughout our berthing compartment.

 

To this day, I don't know of our nervous, tongue-tied SK2 flipped the switches and broadcast to Officer's Country.  If they heard his announcements, they said nothing the next day.  The rest of the crew remembered his performance for a long time to come.