Old Preacher Brown shunned automobiles and preferred riding his ass
every Sunday to church. Once there, he would tie the old donkey to a
tree, next to an old, dry, boarded up well. The small town made do with
one building for conducting school during the week, and church services
were held on the second floor of this building. The preachers pulpit was
right in front of a large glass window, overlooking the old well and the
tree he tied his ass to while preaching. Well, one Sunday, some kids in
the back pews were bored with the old preacher's sermon, and began
playing with matches... As luck would have it, they set fire to a couple
of old hymn books. The fire quickly spread; and in their haste to get
downstairs and escape to safety, several churchgoers were being
trampled. The preacher took one look out the window behind him, saw his
ass still standing there tied to that tree, and decided to jump thru the
window, land on his ass, and ride for help. The preacher jumped, but
instead of landing on his ass, he hit the old well and fell to his
death. They buried him and his tombstone read: Here lies the body of
Preacher Brown. He couldn't tell his ass from a hole in the ground.