Bobby,... I know it isn't a special day or anything, but I wanted you to know how much I miss you. I would gladly take your place if I could only have a minute to tell you how much I love you. I know you are happy now and will never feel pain again. Now it is me that feels the pain. The pain of losing you. The pain of knowing I can't look into your face and tell you that I love you. I know you don't want me to be sad and I know that you don't want me to cry. There are somethings I have no control over. Loving and missing you are only two of those things. I only wish I could have told you one last time how much I loved you before you left. Not being able to tell you that or to say goodbye, and not being able to do anything to help you when I found you lying there, have been what hurts the most. I want you to know that when you left you took a big part of me with you. There is a big hole in my heart that will never be filled until we can walk sisde by side once again. Dad and I so miss your weekly visits and being able to sit and talk with you. Although I know you are with me in spirit, oh, how I wish you were with me in body. My heart aches for you and the tears are never ending. As you look down on me while I cry don't feel bad for me. Know that my tears are a part of my love for you and just as my love is never ending so are the tears. I would give anything just to be able to hug you and tell you that I love you. We will be together again someday. But only God knows when that day will be. But I want you to know that until God calls me home my heart will always be with you. Just as I know your heart is with me now as I sit here writting this through tears that are freely flowing. My tears will never be wasted because they will always be a part of you and everything you mean to me.
Please, if you can ever find a way to come and talk with me it would be wonderful. To hear your voice even though it was coming from heaven would help to ease my heart. I will always hold you in my heart and the love I have for you will be never ending. I know there is no way I can ever bring you back but you will always know that you are loved here on earth just as you are in heaven.
Take care and never forget how much I love you.
Loving you with the last beat of my broken heart
Mom
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