A Moment

    Dedicated to:  the memory of Teresa...my old
                                                             friend....as
she goes
                                                             to be with God.
                                   in honor of Becky...my new friend...
                                                             who let herself
be open
                                                             to listen to
God...and
                                                             helped me
through a
                                                             lonely time
when I needed
                                                             someone.
                                   in honor of ALL friends......EVERYWHERE

I'm waiting forever...
the clock loudly ticking...
wishing for this  to end...
yet, hanging onto each moment...
and wanting it to last...forever.

All the times...
through all the years...
happy, sad, laughter, tears...
all come down to now...
just one unwanted moment...in time.

Your chest rises...
another breath keeps you here...
for another moment...
wondering if each will be the last...
and I will have to say......goodbye.

Just a while ago...
you squeezed my hand tightly...
and you smiled...
you told me, "Don't worry...
I'm going on a wonderful trip....don't cry."

There are no more words...
they've all been said...
Yet it seems there are many more....
and always will be...
I comb your hair...your favorite way.

I hold your hands...I study them...
now so still...and think...
that once they held my babies tenderly...
they hugged and comforted me...
rescued tiny animals...and they loved.

I lay down beside you...my friend...
I hold you and remember...
when we were young...
and many years that now seem as one...
bringing us to this moment...we never imagined.

"Oh God!  Please God, no!"
I don't want her to go.
I feel her going...I hear her going...
I know it is so....but, I don't believe it.
Then everything stops...except my tears and the clock.

The quietness is loud...tick tock...
You lay so still...
Looking peaceful.....I fold your hands...
I hold them...and we pray...
I make calls...for them to take you away.

I sit and I wait...
The room seems so small...
but, I can't leave you...not yet...
Tears fall....gentle and silent...
very sad...yet, treasuring this time.

Tick tock...tick tock...
very soon...a knock on the door will come...
I'll watch them take you away...from me...
I've never done that before...
and then I'll be alone...in this room...by myself.

I'm lost in my thoughts...
and in my grief...
I begin to write words...not wanting to talk...
but wanting to share this pain inside...
because you are gone.

Then God sends a new friend...
unexpectedly she comes to me...
"Ive missed talking to you" ...she says
"How is your friend doing?"
Not here from reading my words...here, for God sent her.

My tears flow more...in sadness...yes...
but also in awe of the plans God has...
I sit here in the middle of an unreal place...
my old friend lies next to me...my past...
A new frind  bringing comfort ...of life and living.

God IS taking care of me...
Yes.....He is...
and I can now say...
"Goodbye, my dear friend...Be at peace...
I will be just fine..........."

By   Cindy Carey