hi i know what you mean by feeling guilty i do sometimes because i couldn't do anything to save tommy either when we called 911 from my kitchen the said not to do cpr if he was shaking all over because it could do more harm then good all we could do was wait and it seemed like it was taking forever and i live right down the street from the fire hall the problem is that we live at #1 but the blockes are way off because the first block on lake doesn't start at 1 so you tell me what a stupid thing that was to do and it seemed like forever i went out into the street and had to wave them down they were stopping up the street i had so much guilt and was blaming them too but when i taked to the doctor she said when she open tommy up his heart was 3times it;s size that the only thing that could of saved was a new heart but i still feel bad because we all tried to get him to see a doctor long ago but he was a thirt nine year old man but a baby to me.so i feel everyone's pain but we have to belive that one day we all will be together again i have to belive it so much and that's a hard thing for mr to think about.welll  all i have to do now is get stamps for my christmas cards.

 your friend sandy