Well...my night was really long because I'm by myself..... again. Claude is gone hunting with Dale for a week. So I'll be alone for seven whole days. I'm already finding it a little hard being here by myself  for two reasons. One, when I'm alone I have a had time sleeping because I can hear every sound, and two, because tomorrow is Andy's heaven day and I'm not crazy on being alone because I'm the type that thinks a lot. I can feel it coming because my nerves are getting the best of me and I've started cleaning again and getting rid of all kinds of stuff. I want to go downstairs and get rid of a bunch of stuff but most of it has been piled in the room where Andy died so I have a few mixed feelings about cleaning the room right now. I want to because now is a good time for me because I'm alone and won't be distracted so I could get a lot done, but it's also the room where Andy died and once I get in there I know for sure I'll start thinking about him and the day he died and I'm not sure if I want to do that. I am not afraid of his spirit or anything like that, because I know he would never hurt me, it's more that it will bring back memories of the day I saw Andy for the last time.

 

So far my day has been really quiet. I don't have very much to do because all my laundry is done and the kitchen is all nice and clean. I think I'm going to have a long week because I won't have anything to do unless I start creating extra work.

 

 I tried calling my family members and low and belold every one of them is doing something. Dale's in the bush with his Dad and June is working. Dave is in Iroquois Falls and Anna is working, Derek and Sue are gone to North Bay and I'm babysitting their dog, and Dawn is sleeping because she just got off a night shift. So I'm by myself with two dogs, a crazy cat and two birds. I guess I'm the zoo-keeper this week. Good thing I have them though because the house already feels really empty and I've got seven days of this.

 

Right now I'm thinking that I should go downstairs and clean the room today... that way I won't have to go in it tomorrow unless I want to. I could wait, and do it at another time,  but it's getting colder and we had some snow today so I don't want to wait to long before I get to it.

 

My appetite has been pretty crappy lately because I don't generally eat much when I'm alone. I haven't seen anybody because they're all doing their own thing, and I haven't talk to anybody because they are all either working or sleeping.

 

My outting basically consist of letting the two dogs outside so they can do their business......how wonderful!

 

So far my day has been quiet. The dogs are both sleeping on the floor and the cat is sleeping on a chair in the livingroom. I'm sitting here at my computer in a night gown at 11:30 in the morning writing down my thoughts and feeling. As you can see my day is not very exciting....is it?