The Cheating Game
I just learned my daughter fudged on a homework assignment. What should I do?
By Jim Burns

I just learned my daughter fudged on a homework assignment. What should I do?

A. If you've caught your child cheating, sadly, you're not alone. Recent studies reveal that cheating is widespread among teens in North America. Some studies even suggest as many as seven out of ten kids have cheated on an exam or homework.

Why the Upswing?
Cheating's always been around. But it's more prevalent today because it's never been easier. The Internet's opened up a whole new world for students to cheat. One high-school teacher recently told me he'd received three English essays that were exactly the same. As he investigated what happened, the three students involved admitted they'd downloaded the paper from the same website. In previous generations, students copied material from the encyclopedia—but at least they had to read the stuff! Today, all sorts of information is available at the click of the mouse.

Another reason for the increase in cheating is that too many adults are providing poor role models. Look at all the government officials caught cheating, or the spiritual leaders, rock stars, Enron bigwigs, or celebrities such as Martha Stewart. The list goes on and on, and it doesn't encourage our young people make wise decisions.

Not Only the Unchurched
But what could be behind this trend when Christian teens are involved? One high-school junior I know, Jennifer, was caught cheating on her history final. Jennifer's a church youth-group leader and her parents have a vibrant faith in Jesus Christ. After Jennifer was caught, she was asked why she cheated. Her response? "I felt so much pressure to keep my GPA up for college scholarships," she revealed. "I knew cheating was wrong, but everyone does it. I guess I just succumbed to peer pressure."

Jennifer received an F on the exam. But when Jennifer's mother talked to the teacher afterwards, she complained, "It's not a criminal offense." The mother then asked Jennifer's teacher if her daughter could take another exam to avoid flunking the final.

Authorities note that like Jennifer, students today feel much more pressure to perform at school. Competition for a spot at a good university and for scholarship money to pay for the school is fierce. The pressure kids and their parents feel has never been tougher—and this causes some to choose to cheat.

What's a Parent to Do?
With a second daughter entering college, I feel Jennifer's mother's pain. But it was still wrong of Jennifer and her mom to try to wiggle out of the consequences of cheating. Jennifer's getting caught may be one of the best opportunities she'll experience to learn a valuable lesson. The Bible says, "The man (or woman) of integrity walks securely" (Proverbs 10:9). When a parent lives out a life of integrity, her children will feel more secure as well.

Since easy web access, grade pressure, and poor role models aren't going away, parents must take an active role to:

. Teach values—it's wrong to cheat. An honest C is better than a dishonest A.
. Dial down the pressure a notch. The teenage years are still supposed to be fun! So celebrate your child's victories and remember there'll be some failures along the way.

. Provide positive role models. Remind your teen that there are positive consequences for not cheating.
By the way, Jennifer's parents "saw the light" and went back to her teacher and apologized. Even good parents can get caught up in the pressure to achieve.

Jim Burns is an author, speaker, and the president of YouthBuilders (youthbuilders.com).
Copyright © 2004 by the author or Christianity Today International/Christian Parenting Today magazine.
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Winter 2004, Vol. 17, No. 2, Page 52