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| | From:  AwnMinees (Original Message) | Sent: 11/19/2008 3:13 AM |
Hey, Where did everyone go? Geez, its not like the world is that busy this time of year.... Just because we had an election, we're preparing for Thanksgiving and some may already be shopping for Christmas - you could still throw down a quickie. Come on, you can all spare at least 5 minutes blowing off some steam here. lol Personally, I think Thanksgiving and Christmas should be kind of a combo celebration. Giving thanks for what we do have and keeping humble and grateful. As for Christmas, I'm so sick of all the commercialization. People forget what this day is meant to celebrate. Where I live, we have had some incredibly horrible fires and so many homes lost and people homeless. I'm planning on volunteering at a shelter or evacuation center. I know the holidays are so hard for so many of us and I'm already in a bad state of depression and these events make it that much tougher to get through but I will do my best to show my gratitude for what I do have going for me. I think being of service will do my outlook on life better. At least I hope so. I hope everyone is doing ok and post on what's going on with you. I need something positive to focus on. God Bless, Jack |
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Hey Jack, I hope all is well with you I have! decided to crawl out of the preverbial cavern. My heads not as clear as I would like but I have achieved a bit of clarity. Maybe I'll get into the he details of my spirit walk another time. On the lighter side the commercialization has begun, the kids have the I wants while I have the how can I make it all happen for them scenario. Voluteering is a really solid thing to do, so many people are in a worse situation than others but they take there position for granted or have an attitude of entitlement. I know for me a tent by the river is only one bad run away (I almost got there this time). I love the holidays,I just think of what they were like when I saw my kids in there holiday best through glass. I used to think it was all fake and plastic until I could'nt decorate the tree with Gabe and Sabrina. It's what you make of it whether you make the man who would'nt have had turkey unless you showed up at seven a.m. to make it happen or my kids smile due to the fact I'm actually there to make sticky buns at seven a.m. I've missed this outlet-I just lost my way for a while, I often thought of what an unhealthy decision it was to block out everything because of my guilt issues but I'm breathing again. I am thankful people who understand the fucked up balancing act it is to be an addict are strong enough to put their baggage out there so we are not alone. You are so right Jack when you say it's a rough time of year for some of us but we are not alone. |
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Hi guys. I think everyone is scared this holiday season. Its very true we need to concentrate on the meaning of each holiday and not the commercialization but we all have pressures. The kids want gifts, we need food and both my kids have birthdays during November and December as well. My kids are both young adults now and understand there is not that extra this year. they have seen the rise in gas costs that were sickening over the summer and know what rent and food costs. I think this is a good year to go back to basics and celebrate thanksgiving with a turkey and be thankful for our friends and loved ones. We need to do the same for Chrsitmas. We may feel more spiritual and set a good example for our children. Nite all. Lori  |
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I also despice the commercialism of Christmas. What i dont understand is i hear everyone saying this but NO one makes changes. Such a crazy crazy world. Jack, try to pretend Christmas is just another day instead of thinking about the false sense we are suppose to be feeling. Love Karen  |
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Hey Justin,
Its so odd that I find so much of myself in how you describe yourself, uncertainty, feeling lost and trying to live up to so many expectations when we can't even control our own.
I think you nailed it when you said that Christmas is what you make it and if decorating the tree with your kids brings you that spirit, you know you're doing it right. I love to see the excitement in kids eyes and how they get so into the simple things.
I'm going to hang with a buddy of mine and his family and his kids are dying to make Christmas cookies, do the stockings, the tree. I think its those seemingly insignificant things are what kids really remember as they get older. Just being there with them is a gift.
Those are the values I wish people would take the time to enjoy with their families. I'm not especially looking forward to the parties and stuff - having to keep my guard up is exhausting. But helping these folks who lost everything in these fires will make me feel apart of something positive and keep my ass busy enough (hopefully) to keep my mind off my own shit.
Interested in hearing about your spirit walk - fire away. Sounds intriguing. Hang in there and maybe now's a great time to share the simple (and do-able) traditions of the holiday. Just having their Mom and Dad is a great gift in itself.
God Bless, Jack |
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hey jack when i read you even i can not believe how much you and justin are on the same page. And we have been together for little over 15 years so i guess you could say i'm an expert on justinism's maybe you are some long lost brother sent to the west coast cuz the east coast knew it could not handle 2 . any how i find some sort of comfort in your posts can't tell you why but it does. i only really bother with this computer thing when jus is not acting "normal" so maybe thats why. ???????????? hope all is well amber |
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Hey Amber,
You don't know how much I would have loved to have had a brother. Justin would be a cool bro to have. I get where he's coming from when he posts and it always kind of throw's me. How he comes across, all I can say is I just get him. Only thing about him that totally piss's me off is he has a woman who loves him and kids. Its cool though cause I know he knows how lucky he is and that's why he tortures himself because he feels he's not enough for you and your kids. (Justin, you are more than enough. Look at what you've been blessed with? I'd give my right arm.)
We addicts do a great job of kicking our own ass's when we're down, don't need any help from other people pointing out the obvious. You tell Justin to hold down the east coast and I'll do my best here on the west coast. No pressure though......(Was that a joke from the depressed dude of the west? There's a holiday miracle right there).
Take care Amber and I'm glad my ramblings give you some kind of comfort. Maybe I'm good for something other then a lonely jealous junkie. (Insert encouraging response here) lol.
God Bless, Jack |
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