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• Willowdale, Ore.: Illegal for a husband to talk dirty during sex.

• Alabama: A man can't seduce "a chaste woman by means of temptation, deception, arts, flattery or a promise of marriage."

• Newcastle, Wyo.: Couples are prohibited from having sex in a butcher's walk-in freezer.

• Cleveland: Women are not allowed to wear patent-leather shoes because they might reflect up her dress.

• Mississsippi: S & M is against the law. Specifically: "The depiction or description of flagellation or torture by or upon a person who is nude ore in undergarments or in a bizarre ore revealing costume for the purpose of sexual gratification."  

• Ames, Iowa: A husband is not allowed to take more than three swallows of beer while in bed after having sex.

• Connorsville, Wis.: It's illegal for a man to shoot a gun when his female partner has an orgasm.

• Harrisburg, Pennsylvania: There is a law against having sex with a truck driver in a toll booth.

• Clinton, Oklahoma: It is illegal to masturbate while watching two people have sex in a car.

• state of Washington: There is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances (including the wedding night).

• Tremonton, Utah: You cannot have sex in an ambulance.

• Alexandria, Minnesota: A man cannot have sex with his wife with the stink of onions, sardines, or garlic on his breath.

• Kingsville, Texas: Two pigs cannot have sex on Kingsville airport property.

• Washington, D.C.: There is a law against having sex in any position other than face-to-face.