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And You Thought You Knew Everything
The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for Blood plasma.
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.
Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.
You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age or older.
The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.
The King of Hearts is the only king WITHOUT A MOUSTACHE
American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive from each salad served in first-class.
Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
Most dust particles in your house are made from DEAD SKIN!
The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did the first "Marlboro Man."
Walt Disney was afraid OF MICE!
PEARLS MELT IN VINEGAR!
The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.
It is possible to lead a cow upstairs... but, not downstairs.
A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6) feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
Turtles can breathe through their butts.
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Your brain weighs around three pounds. All but ten ounces is water.
It takes 200,000 frowns to make a permanent wrinkle.
If you stub your toe, your brain will register pain in 1/50 a second.
[How many times did someone have to stub their toe to figure this out?]
The cartilage in your nose doesn't stop growing. Expect it to grow 1/2 inch longer and wider as you age.
Bone is about four times stronger than steel. It can endure 24,000 pounds of pressure per square inch.
The average adult has about 18 square feet of skin.
To say one word, you use over 70 muscles.
Women have a more developed sense of smell than men do.
There are over 200 taste buds on each of the small bumps on your tongue. |
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Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to their yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternatemeanings for common words.
The winners are:
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained
3. Abdicate (v), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent
6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absent-mindedly answer the door in your nightgown
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp
8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists
13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist
14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there
16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men
The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
9. Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole. |
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"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed
with only the left hand and "lollipop" with
your right. (Bet you tried this out mentally,
didn't you?)
Maine is the only state whose name is just
one syllable. {I'll bet you're going to check
this out.}
No word in the English language rhymes
with month, orange, silver, or purple.
"Dreamt" is the only English word that
ends in the letters "mt". {Are you doubting
this?}
Our eyes are always the same size from
birth, but our nose and ears never stop
growing. {Too bad...}
The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps
over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the
alphabet. {Now, you KNOW you're going
to try this out for accuracy, right?}
The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are
the same whether they are read left to right
or right to left (palindromes). {Yep, I knew
you were going to "do" this one.}
There are only four words in the English
language which end in "dous": tremendous,
horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
{You're not doubting this, are you?}
There are two words in the English language
that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious"
and "facetious." {Yes, admit it, you are going
to say ...... a e i o u}
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can
be made using the letters only on one row
of the keyboard. {All you typing people are
going to test this out}
All 50 states are listed across the top of the
Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
A goldfish has a memory span of three
seconds. {Some days that's about what
my memory span is}
A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th
of a second.
A shark is the only fish that can blink with
both eyes.
A snail can sleep for three years. {I know
some people that could do this too.}
Al Capone's business card said he
was a used furniture dealer. |
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