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Do you ever get those time spans in your sexual life when you don't feel like giving oral sex to your partner??? I'm going thru a spell of this myself right now. I used to always give fettucini oral sex, but for well over 2 mos now I haven't done it not even once. He doesn't complain at all, but I know I used to enjoy this so much because he did and well .... I do it well!!! LOL!! And now... I don't even think about it. I wonder if Fettucini will one day ask me if I can perform this for him? I asked him in the beginning never to ask me because I would know when the time was right for me to do this and he never has. Yet I don't want to punish him from something I used to do constantly for him.
Oh well I don't know why this is so hard for me to do now, but it is and I just wanna know if anybody else gets bouts of this ever?
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Don't feel bad...if you don't want to, then don't. There are other ways to be intimate, that are just as good. That's where the love part comes in. There's sex, and then there's sex with someone you love. Big difference. As long as that love is strong and right, then you'll both find a common ground. It's kind of like a (lol) puppy or dog...you know how they'll go to their favorite blanket, scratch it a bit, turn around a few times, and finally settle in, comfortably? The pguy and I have been together eight years now. You just settle in, and get comfortable, together. It will always change...as you grow older, together, sure it will. It's all good! If you have that love first!  |
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Oh, yes, I missed something! You wouldn't be punishing him if you didn't do that for him. If he truly loves you, anything you do willingly, and with a giving spirit, will be more than enough. You can call me polly-anna lol..........I'm such a sop hehehe! |
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No you're not a polly-anna. You're just a good woman w/morals and scruples. I dig this about you a lot. I know he won't ever be angry w/me for not performing this and he's so good about just loving me and holding me and not having to have the actual act of sex in order to fulfill him. He's good w/snuggling, kissing, touching and talking. I got a great man I'll tell you this. A lot of men I have been w/in my past automatically assumed that because I did it once that this meant I'd always have do it! HELL NO! When I want to is when you'll recieve it and that's if you even do bastard! lol |
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You know what just "screamed" at me? In your words? Those other men. They're past. History. Live today, and look forward to tomorrow. I did that a lot, too, with past relationships. Sometimes they're hard to shake out of your head...but you just gotta try. Not to get into too much detail, but there are certain men I have known and dated that I think about each and every day. I choose to only think of the good relationships. The ones with the goofballs, eh.....I put them out of my mind eons ago! You sound like you have a wonderful man. Yes, you do. Look to tomorrow, kick the past "dust" off your jeans, and...... Thank you for that nice compliment. It gave me little fuzzies  |
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I asked him in the beginning never to ask me because I would know when the time was right for me to do this and he never has. Yet I don't want to punish him from something I used to do constantly for him. Sorry, but I think that is wrong. You've shut off an important topic of discussion and now you wonder how he feels? You've asked him not to bring up the subject, so now I think it is your responsibility. Trust me....if you are wondering whether he feels punished, you have a very good chance of being right. You used to do something that he clearly enjoyed. Now you don't and you have told him that he can't even tell you how he feels about it. The topic is taboo. He may respect your wishes about this, but I would not be a bit surprised if he doesn't feel resentful. This may fester, so because you've forgidden him to bring up the topic, I think that you should do so. Ask him. Open up the topic. He may be reluctant to talk about it because of what you said before, but I think you should make it clear that you now want to discuss it. Silence is never a good solution. |
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I think you misunderstood what I typed SD. I asked him from the beginning not to ever ask me to perform oral sex on him or to make gestures suggesting he wanted this. Men who have done this in the past to me terribly turned me off and I never wanted to perform oral sex after this for sure. So this is not like I was performing this act on him and then I went cold turkey and said I didn't no longer want to discuss why I no longer had the urge to fulfill his needs this way. We have discussed what's going on right now in our sex life and besides this one thing, everything else is wonderful He says he doesn't mind the fact he's not recvng oral sex right now because he knows I'm going thru a difficult time right now and will one day be back to my same "old tricks" again and this makes me feel reassured that he's not resentful. We discuss things a lot and I made sure this is one of the things I bought up last week. But, I, too, Sour Dough feel like you. Here I started this man up on something so great to him and now I'm not into right now like I used to be and I'm wondering if he think's it was all a big act. I think we're ok in this dept for now, but I really need to find the source of the prblm and get back to my normal sexual deviant-self again. LOL! |
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SD hit it on good communication lines always should be open between "lovers" otherwise whats the sense I couldnt enjoy a relationship without oral sex, giving or receiving its such an integral part of our relationship now whether we end up having sex or not.....its like kissing to us |
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It's all pretty much an intregral part for me too, but I'm just not up to my hot seductive ways right now. *giggle giggle* The other evening though we made love and it's was very nice. He was gentle w/me because my body aches so bad now when it's over. I just wanted to end it w/a big bang and because I'm like this we had to have a "normal" finish. LOL! |
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