I was asked about my near death experience. To tell you the truth, I did not get very far because I believe it was a "premature" experience. I was having several medical problems at the time as the result of a flu virus and I become very ill.
One night while lying in bed, I awoke from a sudden realization that I can only describe as the sudden sensation of "no sound." I opened my eyes, and my arm fell off the bed. Everything slowly faded so that I could not see, although I tried hard to focus. I tried desperately to move my arm or cry for help. Nothing happened.
Suddenly I jumped up and ran over to the light switch in my bedroom and tried to turn it on. I was in shock as my hand passed through it and then, as I turned back towards the bed, I could see myself lying there on the edge of it. I tried over and over again believing somehow that my heart would restart if I could only turn the darn light switch on. I suppose it is some sort of combination of panic and symbolism. The connection between the light switch and the heart required no thought at all but just seemed to be at the time.
I became distracted from my light switch task when I heard sounds that were like a huge, full auditorium of voices. I was going to pass through my doorway of my room and move towards the voices although I felt anxious about them. The spirit of my Mother, who is still alive, blocked the doorway and did not allow me to pass towards the voices. (That part is very surprising to everyone, and something no one has heard before.) Suddenly, I was zapped back into my body and it was full of adrenalin! I was able to move again, amazingly enough. Needless to say, I went to the physicians office shortly after that and really felt more than rotten.
Luckily this was the experience just preceding my healing dream which I have mentioned in another chat. I have since been able to recover from the whole flu virus problem right after experiencing the healing dream where I traveled to a very high place. In the very high place I could not see what was happening, but it was a very nice experience. In traveling back down, I was given "water" to pour "on the fishes," which I have always taken as a direction to heal.
As you can see, I never got past the very shocking part of the realization or denial of what was happening, and into the more peaceful part of the experience that you often read about. However, the next experience of the healing dream was one of the most beautiful experiences I have ever had. (I have a friend that had a very shocking, non-peaceful after death experience that is also non-traditional. It is nice he came back for a chance at a better one.)
This is not an experience I ponder too much anymore. Perhaps I should. The funny thing is, when I try to astral travel even today, I still have the experience of getting zapped back!
I ended up at the physician 15 pounds lighter but now recovered from the fever with what seemed to be a problem heart. They decided not to go in and to see if I would get better, since I lived and appeared to be slowly improving. It was a great sign to be able to recover.
I did get better (obviously), but my quality of life was not great at the beginning. However, I did not notice. I went to school every morning, and worked every afternoon until evening. Evenings were set aside for homework and study. I usually retired to bed in the evening not having much energy left. It was hard just to carry my school books from the car to the building for awhile. Things just were so heavy. I probably looked sick, losing so much weight too. I had been skinny before the illness. Then something very special happened.
One night I had an extremely vivid dream that I was living in a war torn place and ended up without a home. I wandered and wandered, looking for a home with many other people who were also displaced. I came upon a place where I could see a citadel in the valley and I considered it as a possible shelter. (What a strange place for a citadel!) It looked like a castle and a thriving place.
Standing outside the citadel was a woman who could only see out of one eye. She had a daughter which she was looking to sell into a wealthy marriage to secure her own future. Because of this woman's harsh view, I chose not to enter the city of these people and continued to the mountains.
I climbed up the beautiful mountains. Climbing and climbing, it seemed to go up forever. My perception changed until I could see nothing at all, but it felt so wonderful I kept on going up somehow. The journey just continued with very little effort on my part. I flowed to the top of the mountain. At the top of this place, I was transmitted healing somehow. It was beautiful although I do not recally any scenery at all.
I was sent back down flying easily, feet up and head down, looking down with a water jug and the idea to heal. The first thing I came upon was a fountain with no water and fish suffering from deprivation still moving slightly. I poured the water on the fountain and the fish sprang to life in a multitude of vivid colors.
This is a very special dream to me because I woke up healed. My strength and stamina returned. Books were no longer heavy. From this I carry the connection of joyfulness with me always. My earthly journey continued by learning therapeutic touch and Reiki and a completely different view and total belief.
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