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Pet Truths

Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.

Dog's have owners. Cat's have staff.

Dogs shed, cats shred.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.

Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.

I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

People that hate cats will come back as dogs in their next life.

We wonder why the dogs always drink out of our toilets, but look at it from their point of view: Why do humans keep peeing into their water bowls?

Women and cats will do as they please... men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.

Here's a list of odd cat truths 'n stuff...

CAT - (kat') n. Dog with an attitude problem.
CAT (n): 1. Furry keyboard cover 2. Alarm clock
CAT (n): A walking ego with fur.
Cat Game #1: Hah - made you look!
Cat quote: "Doesn't take much to entertain a human!"
An aquarium is interactive television for cats.
A cat is easier to train than a man.
A cat is just a bundle of purr.
A cat is nobody's fool.
Cat: Ethereal music wreathed in mystery.
Cats can eat tuna that has not been mixed with Miracle Whip.
Cats must climb into their Daddy's dropped briefs while he is sitting on the toilet.
A cat, the only self-cleaning appliance in the house.
A cat's courage is as strong as a dog's chain.
Cat Game #3: Take up the most room on bed.
Cats must tear into the bag of cat food just to see if it the same as what is in their dish.
The four cat food groups: Dry, Canned, Natural, Yours.
You're not a real person until you're ignored by a cat.
Cat Game #10: Hide and go puke.
A happy cat means a happy household.
A home without a cat is only a house.
As anyone who owns a cat knows: no one can own a cat.

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