A week had almost passed by and Rebecca wasn’t seen around the BUD arena for quite some time now. Perhaps she had other important needs to tend to like, you know, fucking Sparrow’s brains out. On a more serious note, Rebecca headed down to her home of California to take care of some business for that week. However, she was back and ready to tackle whatever insults Jade threw at her, if you could call them that.
Rebecca was currently in the same vicinity as Jade Jiles, the BUD arena, and was currently backstage in her locker room. She was pretending to rearrange the place when Sparrow came a-knocking. Calling him baby, she rushes towards him and wraps her legs around his waist only to give him one of the most passionate kisses and then turns to wink at the camera, or better yet Jiles who is probably watching.
“Roxy should really hire someone with taste.�?/FONT> complains the princess wearing such a sour look on her face. “Whoever painted these walls must have hung themselves in this room.�?/FONT>
“Then we’d have ghosts at night!�?/FONT> Sparrow exclaims causing Rebecca to giggle.
“Speaking of ghosts, I think the ghost of the relationship’s past is here.�?pointing to the muted TV, she lets our audience gets a glimpse of Jade Jiles running her mouth in the ring. “Should we sit down and watch?�?/FONT>
“Sure.�?mumbles Sparrow with less enthusiasm than before. “It’ll be like watching Gigli only with more herpes.�?/FONT>
The Aryan couple sit down and watched as Jade Jiles entered the BUD ring to cut a WWE style promo. They are only able to tolerate a small amount of screeching before Rebecca slams the remote into the television and it goes off with an explosion. All is quite for a moment before both Sparrow and his version of Angelina Jolie burst out laughing. She pouts for a second before climbing on top of him and hugging him.
“Oh baby.�?says the beautiful blonde running her fingers over Sparrow’s cheeks repeatedly. “What will we ever do with your annoying ex wife?�?/FONT>
Just then, a Dr. Jack Shepard stumbles into the room without bothering to knock. He has a drunken swagger when he speaks to the Aryans.
“I’m Jack Shepard and I’m here to conduct an interview with THE miss Rebecca Rancid of Bytches Ultimate Domain.�?says BUD’s very own doctor turned interviewer.
“Jack Shephard?�?Rebecca whispers, obviously shocked to see the main character on one of her favorite shows asking for her. “What in the pink hell are you doing here?�?/FONT>
The man known as Jack Shepard looks behind him for a minute unsure if the bombshell was speaking to him or not. But he quickly acts before she can call him out on his obvious phoniness and takes a seat in front of her.
“I was previously seen in the ring with Mark Hellion giving him a blow job/speaking with him about your feud with Jade Jiles and the woman came into the ring to run her mouth about you. Therefore, I thought since you just arrived in the arena, I would come all the way to your locker room to conduct an interview with you. Well, that and because I think you’re so fucking sexy.�?
He cocks his head to the side in a desperate attempt to check out her ass before Sparrow shoves his hand in Shepard’s face.
“What do you want from her?�?questions Sparrow angrily, and obviously annoyed with Shepard’s antics.
“Chill dude!�?says Jack Shepard in his natural California surfer dude accent before hesitating. “I mean, I am here only to ask her a few questions about her rival and your ex wife.�?
“Shoot!�?shouts Rebecca fully expecting Jack to pull out a gun and blow someone’s brains out, like he did on Lost, but instead, he simply pulls out a crumbled paper from his back pocket and begins to go over it before opening his big yapper.
“Unprepared as usual.�?/FONT> says Sparrow while rolling his eyes. “Roxy needs to hire better staff not from a Versace add."
“Chill, dude.�?Rebecca mirrors Jack Shepard’s request. “This is Jack Shephard from Lost, he’s fantastic.�?/FONT>
“Well I just wanted to know what you thought of Jade’s recent shenanigans.�?says Dr. Shepard.
Rebecca eyes him like she would pull his hair and make out with him if Sparrow wasn’t here to stop here but tries to restrain herself.
“During my absence, Jade was caught on camera performing fellatio on her significant other after speaking of me. I guess I have clearly enraged the Queen Feline to the point that she couldn’t stop talking about me, even while fucking her new play thing, and quite badly I might add.�?It was true. Although Jade had been in bed with most HIV ridden men, she learned nothing from them. “I mean, it’s obvious Kevin was faking an orgasm. What man, unless he’s really pussy whipped, talks about his girlfriend’s rival while making love to her? Perhaps I shall steal Kevin away from her since he seemingly enjoys talking about me while violating that cunt. I wouldn’t be surprised if he called her Rebecca or made her wear a picture of my playboy covers on her face while making her squeal like a pig.�?
Suddenly realizing that Sparrow was sitting right next to her, Rebecca covers her lips and her cheeks turn beat red.
“What?�?she asks regaining composure. “It’ll make a great threesome. Two men that I “wooed�?so easily, directly from the death grip of Jade Jile’s thighs. I’m just yanking your chains.�?FONT color=#999999> she winks and slightly pushes Sparrow with her elbow. “I‘m complete out of Kevin‘s league anyway. He looks like a tattooed, slimmer version of Rosie O’Donnell. Now I see what Jade sees in him, he brings both sexes to the table. And I won’t be shocked if the visions were shared as Jade has a hint of a penis herself.�?/FONT>
The three of them burst out laughing at the same moment but Rebecca is the first to shake it off.
“C’mon, she was asking for it with all that public display of affection!�?exclaims the pyro princess. “Jade really needs to swab Kevin’s cum out of her ears though. If she didn’t hear me clearly, I’ve already had Sean Hunter in the sack long before he even knew such an AIDs whore like her existed. I even called him the other day to ask him about her and he said she was as bad in bed as Taylor Lynn. He even recalled seeing blood stains on the sheets later that day assuming she let him pop her cherry. I think with two big red Xs on Jiles’s sex record, she’s nothing but a washed up has been, both in and out of bed. What exactly has she done in the past year?�?/FONT>
Jack pauses for a few seconds trying to recollect his thoughts.
“Well, she has trained some tard named Louise Horton, or something to that extent who went out to become the biggest loser wrestling has seen today.�?/FONT>
“You mean Louise Houghton who MY protégé beat with such ease?�?inquires the very cocky Rebecca. “Then I concur, Jade has done absolutely nothing, she most certainly hasn’t done anything in BUD that’s worth mentioning either. Aside from that stint of her having a threesome with Drew Stevenson and Jade to prove that she‘s not afraid to be a bisexual, she hasn’t captured any titles since stepping in and out of BUD in her whole career. Where as someone like myself wouldn’t even have to mention my title victories to compare with her. In the past year, I single handedly orchestrated the kidnapping of Mandy Manson’s son Damien. I doubt someone like Jiles could pull that off without making a complete ass of herself. I mean, Mandy Manson only aligned herself with that slut because she had a similar distaste for Midnight or some other jobber Jade was facing that night. Other than that, I doubt anyone would want to have any sort of relation to that woman and I sometimes pity Kevin Sane.�?says Rebecca, softly sighing after.
“Hey, I’m just glad I don’t have to fuck that frigid bitch anymore.�?Sparrows says placing both his arms around Rebecca and placing a kiss on her cheek. “Now that I have this blonde bombshell sex pot on my side, Jiles can run off with her tattooed version of Rosie O’Donnell.�?/FONT>
“Do you think it would be hard to get the two of them in a room together so we can do a compare and contrast?�?asks the barely convincing Jack Shepard.
At this point both Rebecca and Sparrow look at Jack funny but it is only Rebecca who slowly zooms towards his chest reading his name tag.
“Why is your name spelt J-a-c-k S-h-e-p-a-r-d?�?questions Rebecca with a rather harsh tone.
The man known as Jack Shepard looks from side to side before deciding to dart right out of the locker room but before he can go, Sparrow grabs onto him and slams him into the wall. Rebecca follows and quickly examines the man pretending to be Jack Shephard from Lost.
“I knew you were a fake! The real Dr. Jack Shephard has a PhD and is Lost on an island. Why on earth would he be working in BUD? Is this some kind of late April Fool’s joke?�?
So many questions, barely any time to answer any of them. Jack Shepard was like a mole on the ass of BUD, too small of a problem to care about.
“We have to go back, Kate!�?shouts the Jack impersonator as he is taken away by security. “We have to go back!�?And that’s just about the last we’d ever hear from the mole on BUD’s ass.
As for the wart on its ass, it currently awaits for some kind of rebuttal in the ring.
“I think Jade is out there like she was on Jerry Springer calling her cheating husband and his mistress out which always ends up in the favor of the ugly, frigid wife but since you’re such a smart man, it won’t be the same this time.�?/FONT>
“Well if it’s a Jerry Springer show she wants, it’s a Jerry Springer show she’s going to get.�?says Sparrow as he reaches out with an open palm.
Rebecca places hers over it and they are both just seconds away from coming face to face with the woman they both betrayed. The arena goes completely dark as Jade Jiles waits in the ring unaware of who has taken her up on her offer. A pyro blasts right over the stage area as "Just don't give a fuck" by Eminem rips through the speakers. A shooting star hits the top of the BUDvision as red and orange lights start to flash throughout the arena. White smoke completely fills the stage, ring and ramp area making the scene look like heaven. Through the fog, the silhouette of a luscious female is made visible. After it clears out the audience and Jiles get a glimpse of the lovely Rebecca Rancid who continues to walk towards the ramp with Sparrow, Jade‘s ex husband following behind. They both head towards the ring, she slides in through the bottom rope as he gets in through the top rope. Neither of them hesitate to walk straight towards Jade Jiles who stands still in the middle of the ring without moving an inch for these two. Rebecca yanks the microphone away from her and brings it to her lips.
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