I felt compelled to respond to this query and I rarely reply to posts. This is such an honest question that all submissives face and often face time and again throughout their journey. In the post blossom answered her own question, she feels it in her heart.
Life and experience often casts doubts and shadows on what you feel deep inside and it can become muddled and confused until you can't remember up from down. This is all very normal of course and a part of the journey but it takes a long time to get from the "feeling" to the "knowing". For myself I was so set on finding my One that I oftentimes did not fully revel in the experiences I had. Now I have learned to appreciate fully "the one for now" and it has been a blessing in ways I could never have imagined. I can look back at every experience, both good and bad, vanilla and D/s and see how they have helped shape me into who I am today and be thankful for that.
What each person needs in life is different and while for some the sexual is up front, for others it takes a backseat. There is nothing wrong with anyones needs, they are just that, their needs. I do believe that many times we supress some of our needs or compromise in order to maintain a relationship. For myself that does not work for long and I have worked hard to learn to communicate my needs and be responsible for getting those needs met. The relationship I have now is healthier and happier because I don't deny those needs any longer or expect just one person to meet everything I need. It helped that I chose to be with someone that is comfortable enough in His own skin that he doesn't feel threatened by my needs being met in many different ways.
Many blessings to you blossom and may your journey be as enlightening and fulfilling as mine has been to this point and I look forward to the future.
teaz
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