A woman is driving down the read and is speeding. She reaches a tall bridge and on the way down gets pulled over by a cop with a radar gun at the base of the bridge.
officer: Can you tell me why you were speeding??
woman: Officer, Im sorry, but I'm really late to work and in my line of work I can't be late. It's very important I get there on time..
officer: Really?? What is your line of work?
woman: I'm a rectum stretcher...
officer: Really?? What exactly does a rectum stretcher do??
woman: Well, first I put 1 finger in the rectum, then 2 fingers, then my hand....then I insert a machine that slowly makes it 6 feet big!
officer: (with a puzzled face) looks at the woman and says, "What do you do with a 6 foot asshole"?
woman: You give him a radar gun and stand him on the other side of a bridge!