(((((Dear Andrea)))))
There is no need to appologize...we are here for you, to listen and cry with you...you are not alone.
No, dear, you are not going mad...but, I know it does seem like it sometimes.....it is good that you had your parents and were able to stay there..but, I can tell you from experience that two weeks is not nearly enough time to even begin to 'get back on track'. Healing takes time.....lots of time....
As for the medium thing....I don't put much faith in things like that. I do believe that your precious Jacob is in a wonderful place. And, he is in no pain and his little body is whole and healthy....and he is happy.....I believe this of all small children when they die. God takes care of the little children. He will take care of us.....if we obey him and allow him to take care of us. If it were not for my faith....I don't know what I would have done.....God got me through it...and, I believe that if you do take your own life....you will not go where Jacob is...and you would not want that......
It is good that you said you want to make Jacob proud of you....I know he already is......as long as you go on and do the best you can and be the best you can be.
(((Annie)))
Your reply was very powerful and full of emotion....and exactly right.......I can almost feel your pain as you fell to the floor......(and I don't blame you for giving Tim the coke...I would have done the same thing)
Neither of you dear ladies really want to die.....you just want the pain to stop......we all do.....and pray for peace and gentle healing for you both.
Love and hugs....Rean